orangechair4488 Posted April 6, 2006 Posted April 6, 2006 I didnt know he was married till after I got envolved with him emotionaly, he was unhappy and has decided to leave his wife to be with me. I guess he told her about us, cause she called me and started threatening to murder me, and drag me through court/take me for all I have. She has some of my personal info. She has been physicaly abusive to her hubbie, and I am scared for both of us..Does anyone know what she can legaly do to me? I have not slept with him or even met him in person. He lives 3 hrs away, we have not been with in distance of eachother ever.. Can she do anything to us at this point? thanks OC
mopar crazy Posted April 6, 2006 Posted April 6, 2006 Her threatening to murder you is called terrostic threats and it's illegal. I would call the police. Who knows what she is capable of, especially since she is going through such a traumatic time in life (H cheating). As a BS myself I know the pain she is dealing w/ but I never once threatened to hurt the exOW, I just told her to stay away from my H and I wasn't so nice about it. What she is doing is wrong, and illegal. As for her H, if she is beating on him the only thing he can really do is call the police and have her arressted. Even though you have never slept with him, or even met him you are still involved in an EA (emotional affair) and that can hurt worse than a PA (physical affair). My H had both so I can't say which pain is worse. Legally, I don't think there is really anything she can do to you. What she is doing now is illegal.
Sassy Posted April 6, 2006 Posted April 6, 2006 She can get you for alienation of affection. She can take you to court and get everything you got . She could say you ruined their marriage by persuing him emotionally . Threatening to kill you leave that man alone before she hurts you. Women can be brutal when someone messes with their man . Run and don't look back with this MM!!! His marriage may not be that way he was just telling you that. Some MM will tell you what you want to hear. He probably lied to get with you . Emotional or Physical still is wrong he is married. JMO
CeeJayXX Posted April 6, 2006 Posted April 6, 2006 She can get you for alienation of affection. She can take you to court and get everything you got . She could say you ruined their marriage by persuing him emotionally . Threatening to kill you leave that man alone before she hurts you. Women can be brutal when someone messes with their man . Run and don't look back with this MM!!! His marriage may not be that way he was just telling you that. Some MM will tell you what you want to hear. He probably lied to get with you . Emotional or Physical still is wrong he is married. JMO You beat me to it, Sassy. Sassy is absolutely correct. She can get you good in court for disrupting her marriage. Remember, marriage is legally binding. If your MM has children with her, she can get you with that as well. If she has any kind of proof at all and follows through with anything, you will have some nasty days ahead of you. Don't send emails, don't call. Don't even admit any wrong doing..... For your own safety and everything you have worked for, do not contact him and do not accept any contact from him.
Sassy Posted April 6, 2006 Posted April 6, 2006 You beat me to it, Sassy. Sassy is absolutely correct. She can get you good in court for disrupting her marriage. Remember, marriage is legally binding. If your MM has children with her, she can get you with that as well. If she has any kind of proof at all and follows through with anything, you will have some nasty days ahead of you. Don't send emails, don't call. Don't even admit any wrong doing..... For your own safety and everything you have worked for, do not contact him and do not accept any contact from him. Exactly know of this type of thing happen alot in our hometown and it is always is in the paper. My sister also was going to do it but never did . If she would have been alot of court crap and she didn't want to deal with it . Some women will but she had been put through enough with him bringing the women to her house and sleeping in her bed!! Cheating has made my sister a bitter women and still to this day won't trust a man as far she can throw him . Cee is right lose his number ,email whatever that tails you to him. She can make your life a living hell!!
Blind Illusion Posted April 6, 2006 Posted April 6, 2006 Actually, alienation laws have been struck down in over 40 states. Hopefully, you don't live in Hawaii, Illinois, NM, Mississippi, Utah, Illinois, South Dakota and North Carolina. These states still allow such archaic measures that are often used as leverage in divorce proceedings. Personally, I think such statutes are ridiculous. If the man I married is more interested in looking at porn online & this caused an alienation of affection for me, can I sure Bill Gates and Mircrosoft for being the catalyst for this to happen? If my spouse seems to love the bottle more than me, can I have some stock options from Anheuser-Busch to compensate for my mental pain too? What else can I have in this overly litigatious society? Gimme, gimme.
blind_otter Posted April 6, 2006 Posted April 6, 2006 Personally, I think such statutes are ridiculous. If the man I married is more interested in looking at porn online & this caused an alienation of affection for me, can I sure Bill Gates and Mircrosoft for being the catalyst for this to happen? If my spouse seems to love the bottle more than me, can I have some stock options from Anheuser-Busch to compensate for my mental pain too? What else can I have in this overly litigatious society? Gimme, gimme. This is flawed logic because pornography and alcohol cannot actively elicit the man's attention. It's a passive form of infidelity; by definition alienation of affection is something that occurs actively with actions that originate AND focus on a point of interest outside the legally binding relationship. I agree that we live in an overly litigious society, however these law existed prior to the trend that you are referring to. So, you know. I'm just saying.
Blind Illusion Posted April 6, 2006 Posted April 6, 2006 On another thought: While this is none of my business, nor did you ask for advice but don't you think it might have been a wiser move to have met you in person, at least once, before he told his wife about you both and caused all this DRAMA.
Sami_D Posted April 6, 2006 Posted April 6, 2006 Just wondering how far an OW can be blamed for alienation of affection (or whatever) if she's never even MET the man. She sounds like she has something of a screw loose to go threatening people her H has talked to online. I would have thought that of the two of you (W and OW), SHE is the one breaking laws here.
Sassy Posted April 6, 2006 Posted April 6, 2006 Actually, alienation laws have been struck down in over 40 states. Hopefully, you don't live in Hawaii, Illinois, NM, Mississippi, Utah, Illinois, South Dakota and North Carolina. These states still allow such archaic measures that are often used as leverage in divorce proceedings. Personally, I think such statutes are ridiculous. If the man I married is more interested in looking at porn online & this caused an alienation of affection for me, can I sure Bill Gates and Mircrosoft for being the catalyst for this to happen? If my spouse seems to love the bottle more than me, can I have some stock options from Anheuser-Busch to compensate for my mental pain too? What else can I have in this overly litigatious society? Gimme, gimme. I don't know where in North Carolina you are talking about cause i live in north carolina and it has happened quit a few times here. I went to school with the guy that did it against his friend sleeping with his wife and he was a cop and so was the guy ! This was only a few yrs ago.
Blind Illusion Posted April 6, 2006 Posted April 6, 2006 This is flawed logic because pornography and alcohol cannot actively elicit the man's attention. It's a passive form of infidelity; by definition alienation of affection is something that occurs actively with actions that originate AND focus on a point of interest outside the legally binding relationship. I agree that we live in an overly litigious society, however these law existed prior to the trend that you are referring to. So, you know. I'm just saying. Good points. Yes, that is true that most of these statutes originated in times where the frivilous lawsuit was not a common thing. Perhaps not with alcohol, but I do think that pornography can be used as a focal point outside the legally binding relationship when its used to the exclusion of the outside relationship. While the emotional component can and is missing with frequent use of porn , the end result can very well be a deprivation of physical affection by the wife. Why couldn't this be said to occur actively with actions (repeaded sexual release by the man ) that originates and focuses on a point of interest (pornography) outside the legally binding relationship (marital contract) [FONT=arial, verdana, helvetica, sans-serif][sIZE=2][/sIZE][/FONT]
Blind Illusion Posted April 6, 2006 Posted April 6, 2006 I don't know where in North Carolina you are talking about cause i live in north carolina and it has happened quit a few times here. I went to school with the guy that did it against his friend sleeping with his wife and he was a cop and so was the guy ! This was only a few yrs ago. Yes, that is precisely my point, Sassy. NC is one of the few states that allows this sort of thing. While repeal has been introduced in the NC House of Representatives, I think it was stuck in the state senate and died there.
Guest Posted April 6, 2006 Posted April 6, 2006 I didnt know he was married till after I got envolved with him emotionaly, he was unhappy and has decided to leave his wife to be with me. I guess he told her about us, cause she called me and started threatening to murder me, and drag me through court/take me for all I have. She has some of my personal info. She has been physicaly abusive to her hubbie, and I am scared for both of us..Does anyone know what she can legaly do to me? I have not slept with him or even met him in person. He lives 3 hrs away, we have not been with in distance of eachother ever.. Can she do anything to us at this point? thanks OC everyone has made great posts in this thread..I really didn't half of that stuff with the legal side and all. but I can say this..there was absolutely no reason what so ever for her husband to tell her anything about you or your newly found EA. I'm telling you thee only reason he told he was to hurt her was to hurt her..period. if he was leaving then what was the reason to cause her unnecessary pain? there isn't a good enough reason..he was leaving why tell her that? no only to spare her pain but if the are divorcing she can use it against him court..well that just doesn't make sense. do you really want to be with someone who could be this venomous? also did he give her your number and personal info?? again what was point of that? drop this guy like a old hat...fast!
lovernotafighter Posted April 6, 2006 Posted April 6, 2006 eveyone has made great posts in this thread..I really didn't know half of that stuff with the legal side and all. but I can say this..there was apsolutly no reason what so ever for her husband to tell her anything about you or your knewly found EA. I'm telling you thee only reason he told he was to hurt her was to hurt her..period. if he was leaving then what was the reason to cause her unnessary pain? there isn't a good enough reason..he was leaving why tell her that? no only to spare her pain but if the are divorcing she can use it against him court..well that just doesn't make sense. do you really want to be with someone who could be this venomous? also did he give her your number aand personal info?? again what was point of that? drop this guy like a old hat...fast!
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