Guest Posted April 2, 2006 Posted April 2, 2006 When the time has run out on a friendship? I have had this online friend for a very long time. I always assumed we were really close, but over time I have watched her get closer to other people she meets online especially with this one person (in which I've felt that she wouldn't have known if it wasn't for me in the first place and I don't think she realizes that - same with the others). Any way what I'm trying to say is I always put my heart on the line thinking that we are close or I'm close to certain people and it never really ends up being the same for them in return. She's now a mother of two babies in which I'm really happy for her. But I also have realized how different and how our viewpoints on life and culture are really different from each other. Not that it's a big deal because I like being friends with people who have different opinions -- I think it would be insane to have friends who agreed with you all of the time. Course that's just me. However, these days I'm really not liking what she's saying on her blog even though I agree with her to a point for some reason I'm finding myself very angry at what I read. And maybe she's been like that before and I never noticed it because I was friends with her and it didn't matter. So why does it matter now? However, if I let her go I guess to which I already have in a way. I won't have any friends. I KNOW that's not a reason to keep her in my life. I haven't had a friend since like grade school and I'm 27 years old. It's not that I'm not trusting - I'm very trusting. I think mainly me having no friends is a part of me being hugly shy and I was also made fun of up until about High School so it's made me very self concious and I don't know how to talk to people etc. I know I have a lot to work on, but I think for now I'm going to just keep the buddies I love talking with online and to where it's just fun and not so serious and I have to worry about our friendship all of the time. I think I'd want to settle for a real life friendship for those issues. (I mean for those who have online relationships that work good for you! I'm glad they are working out for some people.) I just think online friendships for me are the thing of the past. I always want to meet with them in person and I did meet one, but we aren't friends any more. Other reasons there. But I'm babbling. I guess what I'm also asking is I've tried talking to her about it telling her I think we are drifting apart she is completely understanding and doesn't want the friendship to go...but I think before something happens and it gets worse (not that it has already - it's just strange now) if you were in my shoes how would you end it or would you? Would you just not talk to the person any more? Or would you let them know. What's the more right thing to do here? And what would you expect? Even though I know many people vary. I'm also opening up another blog again just because I like to rant and ramble, but I'm not even sure about letting her know about it, but I know if she found out herself without me telling her I'd hurt her feelings. I think mainly we are going in two different directions. I'm in college part time with a full time job. She's a web designer being a full time mommy. Which is great, but I'm at a lost for what to talk to her about even though I've worked with children myself almost for half of my life. Sighs. I guess I'm at an impass. Help would be great so I thank you upfront! Also sorry for the long babble.
redgreeneyes Posted April 24, 2006 Posted April 24, 2006 When the time has run out on a friendship? I have had this online friend for a very long time. I always assumed we were really close, but over time I have watched her get closer to other people she meets online especially with this one person (in which I've felt that she wouldn't have known if it wasn't for me in the first place and I don't think she realizes that - same with the others). Any way what I'm trying to say is I always put my heart on the line thinking that we are close or I'm close to certain people and it never really ends up being the same for them in return. She's now a mother of two babies in which I'm really happy for her. But I also have realized how different and how our viewpoints on life and culture are really different from each other. Not that it's a big deal because I like being friends with people who have different opinions -- I think it would be insane to have friends who agreed with you all of the time. Course that's just me. However, these days I'm really not liking what she's saying on her blog even though I agree with her to a point for some reason I'm finding myself very angry at what I read. And maybe she's been like that before and I never noticed it because I was friends with her and it didn't matter. So why does it matter now? However, if I let her go I guess to which I already have in a way. I won't have any friends. I KNOW that's not a reason to keep her in my life. I haven't had a friend since like grade school and I'm 27 years old. It's not that I'm not trusting - I'm very trusting. I think mainly me having no friends is a part of me being hugly shy and I was also made fun of up until about High School so it's made me very self concious and I don't know how to talk to people etc. I know I have a lot to work on, but I think for now I'm going to just keep the buddies I love talking with online and to where it's just fun and not so serious and I have to worry about our friendship all of the time. I think I'd want to settle for a real life friendship for those issues. (I mean for those who have online relationships that work good for you! I'm glad they are working out for some people.) I just think online friendships for me are the thing of the past. I always want to meet with them in person and I did meet one, but we aren't friends any more. Other reasons there. But I'm babbling. I guess what I'm also asking is I've tried talking to her about it telling her I think we are drifting apart she is completely understanding and doesn't want the friendship to go...but I think before something happens and it gets worse (not that it has already - it's just strange now) if you were in my shoes how would you end it or would you? Would you just not talk to the person any more? Or would you let them know. What's the more right thing to do here? And what would you expect? Even though I know many people vary. I'm also opening up another blog again just because I like to rant and ramble, but I'm not even sure about letting her know about it, but I know if she found out herself without me telling her I'd hurt her feelings. I think mainly we are going in two different directions. I'm in college part time with a full time job. She's a web designer being a full time mommy. Which is great, but I'm at a lost for what to talk to her about even though I've worked with children myself almost for half of my life. Sighs. I guess I'm at an impass. Help would be great so I thank you upfront! Also sorry for the long babble. Man just give it a chance! Try to make her happy no matter what. And if she's not interested then leave her. There are so many girls out there! Have faith. Peace.
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