KillaPetehog Posted May 26, 2006 Posted May 26, 2006 Rejection being an off-chance occurence is one thing. What does one do if it's almost all the experience one has? If it's got to the point where one (however subconsciously) expects to be rejected (both directly and indirectly) in trying to find dates, how does one get past this, short of cheap psych-up tricks that crumble to nothingness the moment one gets distracted or is off-guard or is in the heat of the moment? The most direct solution I could come up with would be to arrange a massive array of real successes that would outweigh the previous experiences. Unfortunately I haven't any idea how to do that, and the mindset is working against me even if I knew what would work to create the successes. It's gotten to the point where sometimes I think "Why waste my time and remaining emotional resources? I don't need to keep banging my head on a wall." What are good ways to cause oneself to start expecting success, even if one's previous experience was nearly decades of almost nothing but rejection? I think you just got to look at rejection kind of like an exercise. There were many times where I got rejected and I used to be down on myself. But i learned that the pain goes away with time. Sometimes it'll take you months...but keep going at it and eventually the pain goes away. It's the same way with exercise. Each time you work out, you feel some pain. Your muscles are stretching and you aren't used to this new pain. But after some time, you realize that you are getting stronger. It's the same way with rejection. You want to keep going at it until you don't feel the pain. It will take time, but that pain of rejection will go away. Men who are successful with women get rejected too. The only thing is that they let it fall behind them. They keep going. I won't lie. The pain will always be there. The tears will always be there but those tears make you stronger and stronger. My friends and I can go and approach women...but we get rejected a lot...but we also get a lot of numbers too. Increase your attempts without reducing quality and you'll be set. Good luck, man.
Author Lights Posted June 3, 2006 Author Posted June 3, 2006 My friends and I can go and approach women...but we get rejected a lot...but we also get a lot of numbers too. The emphasis there is mine. But that is the difference between your experience and mine--you also get a lot of "numbers" too. Without that, it's all just banging my head on a wall, as I mentioned before. How do I start making it more high-percentage so I do start getting a lot of numbers, and so this doesn't remain an unrewarding ordeal? Increase your attempts without reducing quality and you'll be set. I don't understand what this means. What is increasing an attempt and what is reducing quality?
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