Forever Searching Posted March 29, 2006 Posted March 29, 2006 The good news is I met a new guy and we've been seeing each other for almost two months and things are progressing for the most part very nice. I haven't met anyone in a long time that I feel this comfortable with and he seems to be feeling the same and we have been able to have "the talk" initiated by him and he's already been making plans for future outings together such as weddings this summer and stuff that he would like me to go to with him so I"m pretty sure he likes me. Here is the problem. When we first started dating we kissed all the time and it was extremely passionate then he got a piercing on his lip and wasn't able to really kiss me for about a week. Well since it's healed he has given me pecks on the lips but hasn't "really" kissed me even during sex. It's starting to bug me a bit and I'm not sure what to do. I brought it up once in a non threating way and that's why I'm getting pecks at least. I don't know what else to do besides just taking the reins myself. Any ideas??? I'm the type of person that likes to kiss a lot and it's just weird for me because I've never been with a guy that won't even kiss me during foreplay. Another note.. I don't know if this has anything to do with it but he did get out of a bad breakup/relationship about 3 months before we started dating. Could it be an emotional thing? Not wanting to be emotionally involved too much yet?
TheTallOne Posted March 29, 2006 Posted March 29, 2006 Sit down with him.. and talk to him as a mature adult. Explain your situation, and see if you can get him to open. Don't yell, or scream... and don't be judgemental. See what happens.
brightskies Posted March 29, 2006 Posted March 29, 2006 Here is the problem. When we first started dating we kissed all the time and it was extremely passionate then he got a piercing on his lip and wasn't able to really kiss me for about a week. Well since it's healed he has given me pecks on the lips but hasn't "really" kissed me even during sex. The piercing might've healed but his lip might still feel tender and sore especially with deep kissing. Or, maybe kissing feels weird with the new jewelry on so he still needs to adjust. Did he mention any reason why he's kissing less when you brought it up?
brightskies Posted March 29, 2006 Posted March 29, 2006 It could be still painful. I just looked up healing time frames, and found this: Lip and labret piercing usually take between 6-8 weeks to fully heal. Swelling usually occurs 2-3 days after the piercing, this swelling can last 7-10 days. A longer labret stud must be worn till the initial swelling has gone down; it can then be replaced by a shorter one. Lip and labret piercings have a tendency to move position on the inside of the lip, this process is called nesting. Rings have a greater tendency to do this than labrets because they tend to move around more, which puts stress on the wound. When the lip is pierced the membrane of thin skin inside the mouth is cut, this skin can then move back over the labret stud. Eventually this skin will die off and a depression will form where the stud sits, this can take weeks though and in the meantime the back of the stud can become embedded in the wound. Don't be alarmed if this happens, this is quite common, but in time the wound usually settles down.
Author Forever Searching Posted March 29, 2006 Author Posted March 29, 2006 Thank you Tall one and Brightskies for replying!! I have great news!!! When he got home last night he completely grabbed me and made out with me. How ironic is that? Guess my problem is solved
brightskies Posted March 29, 2006 Posted March 29, 2006 That's great news! Did he explain why he was different by any chance? Like you, I tend to "overanalyze," so until I get a straight answer about something, I keep wondering.
Author Forever Searching Posted March 29, 2006 Author Posted March 29, 2006 That's great news! Did he explain why he was different by any chance? Like you, I tend to "overanalyze," so until I get a straight answer about something, I keep wondering. No, he didn't explain anything but I was too happy to care
RecordProducer Posted March 29, 2006 Posted March 29, 2006 Your story reminded me of the period when my twin boys were little babies, probably about one month old. I was kissing them a lot and then I got a cold sore on my lip. I asked the doctor if I should restrain from kissing them and she said "Well, yes, while you have that cold sore." It was gone in about a week, but I kept NOT kissing them. I just didn't. Then I started feeling guilty about it and, although I was crazy about my babies, I somehow accused myself of being a cold mother and not wanting to kiss my babies. It wasn't like that, but I was very emotional at the time and it hurt me that I didn't start kissing them right after the cold sore was gone. So I just decided to kiss them again and since then I haven't stopped for the following 7.5 years. :love: I would say, insist on kisses. Kiss him and ask him to give you long, wet kisses. After a while, he'll probably go back to kissing you as before.
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