blueberry Posted March 25, 2006 Posted March 25, 2006 Hi there Ive been married for 2.5 years and its always been a rocky road - we've had huge fights and I must say most of them have been a result of me drinking. On the odd occasion when I do come home drunk he chooses that time to fight with me - and I get really argumentative. The thing is he has taken to hitting me now and the other night after a wallop around the head and some kickings on the floor - I called the Police. They came and arrested him. I so ashamed of what I had done that I purposefully got myself arrested so that I could go with him. He spent the night in seperate cells and were both let off with cautions. My husband is also a foreigner here and I nearly ruined his chances of having his visa extended as we were lcoked up at the very unfortunate timing of our Home Office interview. Had I not been so drunk I would not have called the Police - but I was cery frightened. We are currently in the same house as I slowly but surely search for a new place to live. The thing is I can feel my resolve starting to waver as I really do love my husband. I am away from my home country and from my family and friends and I do not really want to enlighten them on the whole situ. I have my first AA meeting tomorrow night - not only because of him but because when I look back on my life (I'm 30) I realise that all my stupid mistakes were fuelled by alcohol - so I am really quite keen to give it up. I don't drink regularly, I binge. Thing is - whilst I can see the problems my drinking has done to my marriage - is that an excuse for him to hit me like that? For the most part, and when treated right, he really is a wonderful caring man who will always go the extra mile - but it seems he never has time for me but I do know that he loves me underneath it all. Right now he is moping quietly around the house encouraging my plans to move which hurts me more. It feels like a vicious circle. any advice or is that a stupid question? upset and well confused mx
Shyguy86 Posted March 25, 2006 Posted March 25, 2006 There is absolutely no reason for him to ever hit you! He has no right to lay a finger on you in rage. Is it your alcohol abuse that bothers him? Try talking to him about it. I'm a non-drinker and I am very dissapointed when someone who I'm attracted to drinks. The best thing to do is to talk it out. You did the right thing by calling the police. Many people are actually killed by domestic violence. Talk to him and if you can't resolve your issues consider leaving him. What's the point of being married to someone who doesn't love you? You can't live out your life like this!!!
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