the_alchemyst Posted March 23, 2006 Posted March 23, 2006 I've been thinking of going to my exbf's house to get my things, but I'm not sure if I should. I haven't seen him in a week. Well, I haven't heard anything from him in a week. The last time I saw him he seemed to be in great urge for me to leave. That good-bye just felt too cheap, given the length of the time we had been together. I have so many things he has given me. They're all around my room, and needless to say, looking at them makes me kinda sad. I was thinking of simply putting them away, but at the same time, I will still know they are there, and in a way, that will hurt just the same as seeing them. My biggest concern is: Should I go get my things from him? I have many things there that I just left because I would take them off over there (hats, jewelry, scarves, etc) and then forgot to bring them home with me. I don't need any of them, although I some things I would like back. But to be honest, I kind of just want to go get everything, including the things I gave him. I just don't want him to have any memory of me is this is how he/it is going to be. What for? But doing things really makes it feel final, and I still hope to be with him again. At the same time, if I just want to make my presence disappear from there, entirely. Should I go get them?
whats wrong with me Posted March 23, 2006 Posted March 23, 2006 Should I go get them?[/QUOTE] yes, but not for him for you. that way you dont have any reason to go back there and he doesnt have any reason to bring them to you...ie "oh, I just found your scarf and decided to return it while your at the restaraunt with your new boyfriend..." its better to get it final now than later!
KittenMoon Posted March 23, 2006 Posted March 23, 2006 Go get your stuff if you want it- ask him to not be there if you can't handle seeing him. Don't use this as an excuse to back him into a corner about what happened. Don't take back the things you gave him, or he really will forget you. I asked my ex to keep the scuba diving monkey I made him at Build-a-Bear and not stuff him in a closet. He said he never would have, so I know good memories will be at hand. Take the stuff you have from him, gifts, pictures, etc, pack it away, put it someplace you don't normally go. This may have been the HARDEST thing for me, seeing that all again. I just did it this past monday. My mom called me right after I had done it, and I just whimpered wordlessly into the phone. She was like "I guess I don't have to ask you how you feel today..." Haha. Then I just sobbed and sobbed. It's so hard, but they all represent happy memories and I don;t believe in tossing those away callously.
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