future Posted March 22, 2006 Posted March 22, 2006 I've been seeing a woman I met online for a couple of months. We get along okay and things were moving along well until this week. An old flame of hers is in town for some business and asked her to dinner. She told me she was going and I didn't say anything one way or the other. Anyway, to get to the point of my post, I haven't heard a peep out of her since before the dinner, no phone calls, emails, nada. My gut is telling me that this isn't the way things are supposed to work but I don't want to seem paranoid that she's jumping ship at the first opportunity. A friend of mine told me not to call or email her and just wait. So, that's what I've done so far. It's been almost two days since our last conversation so could someone please tell me what to do to squash this sinking feeling inside that I have?
whichwayisup Posted March 22, 2006 Posted March 22, 2006 Don't try to contact her, let her make the effort. Your friend is right. The thing is, she was honest with you and told you, when infact she really didn't have to do that...I would just wait it out and see what happens next. If afew more days go by, then I would definately email her and ask her what is going on, that you don't want to be made a fool of - That if she isn't feeling it for you anymore, she should just come out and say so, because keeping you at arms length for no reason isn't nice. Can I ask? When you found out she was going for dinner with her EX, did you react to that?
Author future Posted March 22, 2006 Author Posted March 22, 2006 Thanks for your advice. To answer your question, I didn't say anything at all when she told me. It was in an email and I just didn't make any comment at all about it.
whats wrong with me Posted March 22, 2006 Posted March 22, 2006 for future reference if something like that happens again...make a comment. If I would have been the women I'd feel a little uninportant to you because you didn't comment about it at all. maybe she doesnt, but I know I would have (felt uninportant). Also I usually agree with wwiu but mot this time...I would want you to contact me (if I was the woman in this situation) also if you got a "gut" feeling about this go with it...our guts are usually right.
Author future Posted March 22, 2006 Author Posted March 22, 2006 Now I'm confused. If I'm supposed to trust my gut why would you expect me to contact her?
l2hvn Posted March 22, 2006 Posted March 22, 2006 I don't know. I personally wouldn't want to be in contact with any of my ex's, unless I have a hidden agenda (not like I've ever done it, but you get my drift). So in your case, if your gut tells you to not contact her, then don't. Did you guys already have a mutual agreement to be exclusive? If not, then in her opinion, it's okay to see her ex over dinner. But if you two are already exclusive, then that's just wrong!
whats wrong with me Posted March 22, 2006 Posted March 22, 2006 I'm sorry I edited it....I just know me personally I would want the contact from you.... but you know "her", not me, so you should trust your gut....sorry for being so confusing!!! sorry editing again.... but it seems to me your paranoia is also you"gut feeling" so I'll rephrase and ask you which "gut feeling" is stronger the one that has you paranoid? or the one that says dont contact her?
Recommended Posts