normal guy Posted March 20, 2006 Posted March 20, 2006 my gf broke up w/ me in november tell ing me that i didn't do anything wrong and that she didn't want to be in a relationship,i tried to explain my feelings to her and she only $hit on me. she made me feel really bad about myself and i couldn't see what was happening. since mid january Ive been no contact , valentines day and her birthday were difficult but i did it. I ve been working ft and going out with friends and doing fairly well. We have some mutual friends and the other day i went to drop off a friend and i saw her. I didn't know what to do at first and then she came over to my truck and waved to me from the passenger side door. WEIRD... she was joking around and seemed happy i was there ??? we each said a few words to each other about the evening and that sort of thing. I then started to get that sick feeling in my stomach. was shaking a little and then a few minutes later i left unanounced. suprisingly she of all of our friends called me to c why i left. I could't answer the phone and she left a message. The strange part, she called me at 3 in the morning, no message though and i didn't call her back (yet)? nc is the best for me and Ive had a few rough days but i am confused as to what or why i still feel the same hurt that i felt months ago? should i call her back?
Dinnj1 Posted March 20, 2006 Posted March 20, 2006 should i call her back? Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo ! not till that sick feeling in your stomach goes away.... or 2008, which ever comes first. Seriously... your thread doesn't have a WHOLE lotta info... other then she left you cause it wasn't your fault... she didn't cheat... you didn't cheat. Although she hurt you... it doesn't seem like a lot of drama went on..soooo, this is a tough one. personally, I'd wait for her to call again, let her leave a voicemail... maybe she'll offer a little more information about herself, what she's been doing... if she misses you??? *hint hint*... Regardless, she broke it off.... so don't chase her.
CaliGuy Posted March 21, 2006 Posted March 21, 2006 Yep. Don't chase her. Women are not attracted to weak, clingy men who give their power away. Be strong. Show her you are fine without her. Keeping building a life of your own to the point you realize you don't 'need' someone in your life. At that point, women will find you more attractive. Wait and see if she calls again. Calling at 3am might have just been 'drunk dialing.'
Dinnj1 Posted March 21, 2006 Posted March 21, 2006 'drunk dialing.' still workin' on the 'cellphone breathalyzer' gonna mass market it to everyone here on LS!!!! make millions! I got a lil' tipsy the other night myself.... was soooo tempted to send a tipsy txt message.... refrained from doing so... passed out. Slept pretty good too I might add. Woke up the next morning... and sent the 'saved' text from the night before. Go figure??? Did it sober..... ugh! no response... back to square one.
Author normal guy Posted March 21, 2006 Author Posted March 21, 2006 THANKS! 2008 sounds good unless hell freezes over then I'll think about it There was more to it than I could even type as far as feelings go, but I can say I've never felt like this and never want to again. I did chase her for a while and I know that's not what I'm going to do ever again, it definitely dosent work. I've often thought of calling DRUNK OR SOBER and have always found ways not to do it. This site is what has helped me through this, the advise and the ways of looking at things you guys are great. I won't call her unless she makes it clear as to her intentions. Even then i might not. We will be able to talk some day but not till 2008 or so. I am doing far better than I ever thought possible, depression, and lack of self-respect are fading with every passing day. NC4ME
Dinnj1 Posted March 21, 2006 Posted March 21, 2006 Great! Now give me the same advice... cause I can't seem to listen to my own...
CaliGuy Posted March 21, 2006 Posted March 21, 2006 Great! Now give me the same advice... cause I can't seem to listen to my own... It's hard to listen to our own advice, because our heart interfers with the workings of our brains and gut feeling. We'll all be better over time. Sometimes you have to walk through a ton of cow poop to get to the greener pastures on the other side, no?
Dinnj1 Posted March 21, 2006 Posted March 21, 2006 Sometimes you have to walk through a ton of cow poop to get to the greener pastures on the other side, no? OR- go through hell to get to heaven... same difference:p
Author normal guy Posted March 22, 2006 Author Posted March 22, 2006 Funny you say that abuot a year ago my friend went through the similar heart break as I and I gave him advice. he also mentioned that to me when this all started, of course I was in denial. Caliguy is right we can,t always see what's going on cause love and emotions get in the way. Sometimes you step in $hit and come out smelling like a rose GO FIGURE Many thanks again.
Author normal guy Posted March 22, 2006 Author Posted March 22, 2006 More news ... I guess she was actually a little mad at the fact that I left and was wondering the reason. Someone told her in a round about sort of way, it was cause of her and that i was just trying to move on. my reliable source said she acted as though she regretted dumping me and she seemed as though she knew what she lost. there were other things that were said but they're a bit fuzzy my friend couldn't remember all of it. hey it's the way it goes, I'm well on my way to being successful with my healing. let her wonder what could have been, the same as I have. Oh yeah drunk dialing was a really good possibility the other day and that she can only really show me her feelings when she 's a lil tipsy
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