matthew_SA Posted March 19, 2006 Posted March 19, 2006 for a little while now my long-term girlfriend and i have stopped making love and all sexual activity completely. i've broached the issue with her numerous times, letting her know my feelings on the matter. she tells me that sex isn't important to her, that it's a desire as a opposed to a need. i explained that sex is a psychological need for me in a relationship, just as signs of affection like hugs and kisses are, the lack of which may indicate a problem between both partners. i've tried several avenues - talking about sex frankly, encouraging her to develop her OWN fantasies and help construct fantasies for eachother, and by focussing on trying to alter her mindset to sex whenever it comes up. all of these have failed, with her claiming that i'm forcing her to do it, to have sex when she really doesn't want it. the truth is, my suspicion is that she's grown bored with me (understandably) but i was hurt most of all by her refusal to try and tackle the situation. her straightforward answer? "i'm happy the way i am." i'm well and truly at my wits end. ANY suggestions will be appreciated.
Aussie65 Posted March 20, 2006 Posted March 20, 2006 Matthew this happened to me in a past relationship however I was the one that was not interested in sex and to be honest with you I realised that I just did not love this person anymore so after 6 months I decided to finally let go. This is only my story although your girlfriends could be different.She could be tired,she may lack labido.Does she kiss you at all or show you any sign of affection?I think you need to look for the signs and see if she is not just with you out of habit or security reasons. You have done the right thing by telling her of your needs and I think you explained it wonderfully If it's libido then she should go get checked out by her Doctor.I do know there are vitamins that you can buy now that are suppose to really work well and you can buy them over the counter.A friend told me about these and said they are fantastic! So anyhow best of luck with it,I hope you get things sorted out soon.
SuperMonk Posted March 20, 2006 Posted March 20, 2006 I noticed that no women responded, because they know this and maybe won't tell the guys online the truth: She doesn't like you that much anymore, and possibly found another dude. ... I know when I don't feel it for a girl, I cut it off and the girl knows right away that I'm not into her anymore. It's the same idea...
babbah Posted March 20, 2006 Posted March 20, 2006 IMO, maybe she got bored with you and wanted to find another man...yknow, for a change. it hurts but its true that a lot of people are not contented with only one guy/girl.
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