noclobber Posted March 17, 2006 Posted March 17, 2006 I just came back from lunch with my 2 Indian colleagues (females) at work. We happened to talk about dating and marriage and I was surprised to no end when one of them said "I will not even consider dating a guy if he is earning less than $100,000 per year". I was curious and asked why does money have to come into the picture and she said that is very very important for love. I have to say that I was slightly attracted to this woman and thought about asking her out. But I have already lost whatever attraction I had for her.. I don't know whether I am wrong but I find this to be ridiculous... I just got a new job (yesterday) that is going to pay me $90,000 per year... but its still 10grand less I would like to know women's opinion about this. How important is money for you?
Art_Critic Posted March 17, 2006 Posted March 17, 2006 Simple.. Money = Security Some women just move the bar around depending on the kind of security they are looking for or need.
monkey00 Posted March 17, 2006 Posted March 17, 2006 Simple.. Money = Security Some women just move the bar around depending on the kind of security they are looking for or need. Money also = Power. that's how it was in the past and still is today. exactly...that's how it is nowadays. Most women are looking for the provider figure. But the expectations of each woman varies vastly, culturally or individually. Thats why many are willing to compromise just to date/marry an older man because of his status in society.
fraidycat Posted March 17, 2006 Posted March 17, 2006 Well, maybe that woman was just plain a golddigger! However, money is important to women for reasons of security.We want to know that if we end up in a marriage and raising a family with a man that he can support us! I never have and never will narrowed down my scope of men by how much money they make, those specifics don't really matter to me as long as it's practical for raising a family and taking care of them. I guess of course different values play a part in it..some beleive that the wife should stay home and take care of the kids and some women feel that same way..so money is going to be an issue of..do you make enough to support me and the kids and pay for this and that and this and that? In situations where both parties are ok with the wife working, money will still be an issue because women like to feel taken care of! It's just our nature. I'm a free spirited little miss indepedent by nature that's just how I am..but I don't want to feel like i'm wearing the pants in the family! We like to be strong and think for ourselves but we love the idea of having a man who protects us and takes care of us. If a woman feels that security need cannot be met by a man chances are she won't find him suitable for marriage..and if you're not looking for marriage why are you dating? so you can throw X amount of days,weeks, years, or months down the tubes eventually? I suppose it's some peoples logic but I don't get it? ANyhow! That's a whole other issue..hopefully I could provide some insight for you!
Author noclobber Posted March 17, 2006 Author Posted March 17, 2006 Okay, but I do hope that I made the correct decision of killing my interest in this woman. Whatever be their need I just can't put up with this...
BlahBlahQueen Posted March 17, 2006 Posted March 17, 2006 Money is a total nonfactor for me. Most of my past SO's have been dirt poor - or unemployed. But you know what a gypsy I am. A 9-to-5 doesn't really coincide with my view of life. And money doesn't buy the things that make me giddy.
alphamale Posted March 17, 2006 Posted March 17, 2006 . I don't know whether I am wrong but I find this to be ridiculous... yes NOCLOBBER....its about as rediculous as you being attracted to her becasue of her beautiful face or nice body. men go for youth and beauty and women go for money. end of story.
fraidycat Posted March 17, 2006 Posted March 17, 2006 LoL- Noclobber I think you did the right thing..I don't deny money is a security factor but the whole 100K standard thing...she a golddigger!..but 90K..hmm where do you live? How old are you? You can transfer your interest onto me if we're anywhere close- HAHAHA
monkey00 Posted March 17, 2006 Posted March 17, 2006 Okay, but I do hope that I made the correct decision of killing my interest in this woman. Whatever be their need I just can't put up with this... If you start dating and a woman's expectations of you are broad or unrealistic, she isnt for you. The last relationship i was in ended because she was simply into older men who already had the stable job/house/car..and this guy was 10 years older..Something i couldnt offer her at the present. as much as i'd hate to say yes she secretly was a gold digger at heart. But hey, there's always somebody out there for someone who'll accept you as you are or more.
prfrogkisser Posted March 17, 2006 Posted March 17, 2006 I agree with Jennifer Lopez "Love wont Cost a Thing" and Destiny Child "Independent Women". True money can guarantee security. But like Kayne West states.... Im not saying she is a golddigger but she wont date a broke, broke lol. Back to a serious note. If women want to a secure confortable life dont depend on a husband for it. There is no better feeling that working hard to get those things you always wanted. I have friends who say things like i need to see his credit score or he has to have an american express gold card. That is so superficial. There is always the possibility he might leave you for someone else or loose all his money. Someone should like you for you not because you have Cd's or a huge saving account. When you grow old together the only thing not has no possibility of changing is how you will both feel about each other. Material things cant last forever. I would be very careful if you decide to date her. Because of your current income you might measure up to all her expectations. Look for someone you likes you for you not what you can provide for them. this type of woman will be more reliable to stay with you during the good and the bad times.
whichwayisup Posted March 17, 2006 Posted March 17, 2006 Was she serious or just messing around? How well do you know her? Cuz I would come right out and ask her if she was kidding or not. Ask her to be really honest about answering that question. She could have just said it or maybe she meant it. If were a guy and some girl I really liked said that to me, it definately would make stop and think...But if I really DID like her, I'd atleast try to see if the good outweighed the bad before deciding to not ask her out.
Author noclobber Posted March 17, 2006 Author Posted March 17, 2006 LoL- Noclobber I think you did the right thing..I don't deny money is a security factor but the whole 100K standard thing...she a golddigger!..but 90K..hmm where do you live? How old are you? You can transfer your interest onto me if we're anywhere close- HAHAHA I am 30 years old and live in California. I know its an expensive place but I still find this girl's expectations ridiculous..
justagirliegirl Posted March 17, 2006 Posted March 17, 2006 yes NOCLOBBER....its about as rediculous as you being attracted to her becasue of her beautiful face or nice body. men go for youth and beauty and women go for money. end of story. Yes, it is just that girl's standard and people are poo pooing it because it is "shallow". No different than the guy who wouldn't date anyone over a certain dress size or age. I make a lot more than that and most guys couldn't care less and some are even offended by it. All they care about is what I look like.
justagirliegirl Posted March 17, 2006 Posted March 17, 2006 I am 30 years old and live in California. I know its an expensive place but I still find this girl's expectations ridiculous.. And you'd date the nice 50 year old gal who weighs 300lbs right?
Author noclobber Posted March 17, 2006 Author Posted March 17, 2006 Was she serious or just messing around? How well do you know her? Cuz I would come right out and ask her if she was kidding or not. Ask her to be really honest about answering that question. She could have just said it or maybe she meant it. If were a guy and some girl I really liked said that to me, it definately would make stop and think...But if I really DID like her, I'd atleast try to see if the good outweighed the bad before deciding to not ask her out. She is serious WWIP! I was so surprised and I kept asking her and we both got into a 2 hour discussion. She really means it!
Art_Critic Posted March 17, 2006 Posted March 17, 2006 And you'd date the nice 50 year old gal who weighs 300lbs right? sure .... if she made 200k a year and had a trust fund
fraidycat Posted March 17, 2006 Posted March 17, 2006 Pffffrog I agree and disagree with what you had to say,I agree you shouldn't be totally dependent on someone else for security and that it does feel good to have achieved something yourself. However you want a man who is on par with you in the sense of motivation and hard work, and what not yes? Secondly,it's true material things are just things and it's not the most important thing in the world but I can't tell you how many relationships/marriages I've seen go down the tube over money issues..call it shallow or superficial or anything else but it's also realistic..if you're going to grow old together and lay in bed and cuddle and think of how much you love eachother..someone has to pay that heat bill...lmbo ok now I am being just plain a smarta**...no but really.
fraidycat Posted March 17, 2006 Posted March 17, 2006 Well noclobber..like I said you can always transfer your interest onto me- ahahahaha
Author noclobber Posted March 17, 2006 Author Posted March 17, 2006 And you'd date the nice 50 year old gal who weighs 300lbs right? But atleast I won't issue statements like "I won't even consider dating unless and until you look like Charlize Theron"
Author noclobber Posted March 17, 2006 Author Posted March 17, 2006 Pffffrog I agree and disagree with what you had to say,I agree you shouldn't be totally dependent on someone else for security and that it does feel good to have achieved something yourself. However you want a man who is on par with you in the sense of motivation and hard work, and what not yes? Secondly,it's true material things are just things and it's not the most important thing in the world but I can't tell you how many relationships/marriages I've seen go down the tube over money issues..call it shallow or superficial or anything else but it's also realistic..if you're going to grow old together and lay in bed and cuddle and think of how much you love eachother..someone has to pay that heat bill...lmbo ok now I am being just plain a smarta**...no but really. I get your point. But there is a difference between "I want a financially responsible man" and "I want a man that makes 100k or more".
Author noclobber Posted March 17, 2006 Author Posted March 17, 2006 Well noclobber..like I said you can always transfer your interest onto me- ahahahaha You are welcome to San Francisco anytime baby :love:
fraidycat Posted March 17, 2006 Posted March 17, 2006 Babe- I know it. It's just like you said..it would be like you saying I won't consider dating someone unless they look like Charlize Theron. Like I've said all along..she's a golddigger,you did the right thing, you can do better..and I'm right here...wow I'm hitting on a guy via message board posting..ahh well I always did like to try new things
BlahBlahQueen Posted March 17, 2006 Posted March 17, 2006 Gawd, what is it, mating season or something?!
Author noclobber Posted March 17, 2006 Author Posted March 17, 2006 Babe- I know it. It's just like you said..it would be like you saying I won't consider dating someone unless they look like Charlize Theron. Like I've said all along..she's a golddigger,you did the right thing, you can do better..and I'm right here...wow I'm hitting on a guy via message board posting..ahh well I always did like to try new things Yup, that one is a gold digger for sure. Is that you in your avatar fraidycat? You look hot
fraidycat Posted March 17, 2006 Posted March 17, 2006 Is it mating season? Yeah I think so..it is spring and all..lmbo...yeah it is me noclobber..you got email an address or what?
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