kpin124 Posted March 15, 2006 Posted March 15, 2006 ok i am really getting mad ....... i haven't really had any contact with mm in at least a week more like 2 weeks now well the other day he told me emergency no text at all i will call you monday..... well monday came and no call or text from mm well finally today i sent him a message asking him to please talk to me that i was worried and needed him to talk to me well he replys with this..... cant text...... thats it thats all he said i have no clue what is going on and i am so frustrated right now... i am just wondering have any of you ever received a message like this??? i sent him a text back saying you can't text today or you can't text me anymore ??? and i am getting no response..... i just wish i knew what was going on......
whichwayisup Posted March 15, 2006 Posted March 15, 2006 Leave it alone. It's obvious that the 'emergency' has something to do with his wife. She probably has stumbled onto his online account and is tracking what he does on the computer. Try not to worry. And honestly, it isn't your problem, it's his. If he really wanted to get hold of you, he would have by now... His actions are saying alot, you just have to read between the lines...Or shall I say, his silence.
No Stress Lady Posted March 15, 2006 Posted March 15, 2006 ok i am really getting mad ....... i haven't really had any contact with mm in at least a week more like 2 weeks now well the other day he told me emergency no text at all i will call you monday..... well monday came and no call or text from mm well finally today i sent him a message asking him to please talk to me that i was worried and needed him to talk to me well he replys with this..... cant text...... thats it thats all he said i have no clue what is going on and i am so frustrated right now... i am just wondering have any of you ever received a message like this??? i sent him a text back saying you can't text today or you can't text me anymore ??? and i am getting no response..... i just wish i knew what was going on...... Unfortunately, as the OW you're just going to have to get used to this kind of thing - he could have a family crisis - maybe his wife's had a PI on his trail, maybe she's found out about you - he's clearly either unable or unwilling to contact you at the moment so I suggest you just keep yourself busy and try to focus on other stuff. All you can do is wait and see what happens.
Author kpin124 Posted March 15, 2006 Author Posted March 15, 2006 We haven't been talking online for at least 3 months now maybe longer so i know she hasn't found anything on his computer.... also there is no way for here to see what my text messages have said because he deletes them and they aren't printed on the bill all she could of seen was how many he has sent or received..... He has done this 2 times before but it was by email basically he just vanished for several months wouldn't return my emails and then all of a sudden one day there he was back in my life and i wanted him all over again.... both times i told myself i wasn't going to let him hurt me again but i have this time our relationship is alot more in depth we have actually taken to a sexual level ......... i just don't know
justagirliegirl Posted March 15, 2006 Posted March 15, 2006 Wow a married bf who vanishes for months! What a great catch!
No Stress Lady Posted March 15, 2006 Posted March 15, 2006 We haven't been talking online for at least 3 months now maybe longer so i know she hasn't found anything on his computer.... also there is no way for here to see what my text messages have said because he deletes them and they aren't printed on the bill all she could of seen was how many he has sent or received..... He has done this 2 times before but it was by email basically he just vanished for several months wouldn't return my emails and then all of a sudden one day there he was back in my life and i wanted him all over again.... both times i told myself i wasn't going to let him hurt me again but i have this time our relationship is alot more in depth we have actually taken to a sexual level ......... i just don't know Then why are you bothering with him?!!!!!!!!!! He's wasting your time, he's manipulating you. All this drama..........is it really worth it?? Presumably during those several months you were just hanging on waiting for him - do yourself a favour and dump him - he's not worth it!!!!!
erika2610 Posted March 16, 2006 Posted March 16, 2006 He is married! What do you expect? So glad to see ya back Lishy
erika2610 Posted March 16, 2006 Posted March 16, 2006 We haven't been talking online for at least 3 months now maybe longer so i know she hasn't found anything on his computer.... also there is no way for here to see what my text messages have said because he deletes them and they aren't printed on the bill all she could of seen was how many he has sent or received..... He has done this 2 times before but it was by email basically he just vanished for several months wouldn't return my emails and then all of a sudden one day there he was back in my life and i wanted him all over again.... both times i told myself i wasn't going to let him hurt me again but i have this time our relationship is alot more in depth we have actually taken to a sexual level ......... i just don't know So why do you keep letting him do this to you? When my ex-MM stopped contacting me for a while, it's because his W found out. It doesn't matter that she doesn't see your text messages and what not.. a wife has ways of finding out. If I were you, I would just cut my losses and go now. He does this to you because he knows he can. He's done it before.. and he will again. It's a vicious never ending cycle... that it looks like you're going to have ot be the one to break.
whichwayisup Posted March 16, 2006 Posted March 16, 2006 And I hate to say this, but you need to hear it. IF his wife infact found out, you don't exist in his life anymore. Sorry to make it sound harsh, but he will be making it up to her, and one of her requests will be NO CONTACT with you anymore. She is his first priority if he wants to save his marriage. Yes, I'm sure this hurts you, but he is hurting you in so many other ways, so it's best to shield your heart, distrust him more now than ever, and walk away, with self respect. Don't contact him again..If you do, that is setting yourself up for an even bigger hurt.
erika2610 Posted March 16, 2006 Posted March 16, 2006 WWIU is right. Plus if she finds out, he'll turn it all around to be YOUR fault. You're the one that seduced him.. yadda yadda yadda. When my MM wife found out, he stopped all contact with me. Blamed me for her finding out. A coupled months later, he came back to me, but not for long. She threw him into marriage counseling.. I never heard from him again.
skiing Posted March 16, 2006 Posted March 16, 2006 WWIU is right. Plus if she finds out, he'll turn it all around to be YOUR fault. You're the one that seduced him.. yadda yadda yadda. When my MM wife found out, he stopped all contact with me. Blamed me for her finding out. A coupled months later, he came back to me, but not for long. She threw him into marriage counseling.. I never heard from him again. Hi. I just wanted to say that when I read this post, I thought of my Husband. When I found out about his affair, he took all the blame for it. She was at no fault. To this day, he still wont admit she was just as wrong. I wonder, he must have loved her, or maybe still does to be so protective. God bless.
Ladylay Posted March 16, 2006 Posted March 16, 2006 ok i am really getting mad ....... i haven't really had any contact with mm in at least a week more like 2 weeks now well the other day he told me emergency no text at all i will call you monday..... well monday came and no call or text from mm well finally today i sent him a message asking him to please talk to me that i was worried and needed him to talk to me well he replys with this..... cant text...... thats it thats all he said i have no clue what is going on and i am so frustrated right now... i am just wondering have any of you ever received a message like this??? i sent him a text back saying you can't text today or you can't text me anymore ??? and i am getting no response..... i just wish i knew what was going on...... He cant text " means " he cant text. Dont waste time on this guy, find someone who can text. You are worth it!
Author kpin124 Posted March 16, 2006 Author Posted March 16, 2006 wow... thanks for the replies everyone..... The thing is i know he is controlling me and for some reason i guess maybe i like it... does that make since???? My H doesn't try to controll me i can do what ever i want when ever i want so i think that may be the reason why i let him controll me... also the times that he has vanished for several months i have went on with my life i would sometimes think about him but i was starting to forget him but this time i just don't know how that is going to be possible i need closure on this i need him to say leave me alone i need something does that make since to anyone?? it is just hard
MsColorado Posted March 16, 2006 Posted March 16, 2006 wow... i need closure on this i need him to say leave me alone i need something does that make since to anyone?? it is just hard The needing closure part does make sense to me kpin and probably to every woman on these posts...but when you are talking about the antics of a cheating, married man...very few things make sense. And when it comes to breaking up or stopping contact with a woman, most married men and quite a few single men, tend to be real wimpy. They want to try to escape quietly rather than just be honest and upfront -- they don't want to deal with the questions and the tears. You need to pay attention to his actions - and his actions are telling you all you need to know. You're not important in his life - and he treats you in that manner. Break it off with the jerk, invest time and energy into your marriage. I wish you all the happiness in the world and I truly am sorry for your hurt -- it will pass and you will one day shake your head in disbelief how you could have ever let that weasel make you feel so bad.
whichwayisup Posted March 16, 2006 Posted March 16, 2006 wow... thanks for the replies everyone..... The thing is i know he is controlling me and for some reason i guess maybe i like it... does that make since???? My H doesn't try to controll me i can do what ever i want when ever i want so i think that may be the reason why i let him controll me... also the times that he has vanished for several months i have went on with my life i would sometimes think about him but i was starting to forget him but this time i just don't know how that is going to be possible i need closure on this i need him to say leave me alone i need something does that make since to anyone?? it is just hard If you want to continue on this rollercoaster, keep doing what you're doing, and allowing him to treat you like crap and control you...OR, take the power back and STOP letting him DO this to you! Send him an email saying you no longer wish to see/talk to him, and say goodbye. No explanation is necessary...You don't owe him ANYTHING. You have to make your own closure and make peace with this situation. Don't rely on him to do that for you. And ofcourse it will be hard, but it's better to do this NOW rather than another 6 months from now when you're even more attached to this MM. Renew those feelings for your husband, forget the MM. You only need one man in your life, so please work on your marriage. Your husband should be your main focus.
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