justpeachy Posted March 14, 2006 Posted March 14, 2006 I'll try to make this short. My husband and I are young, married less than a year, and we have a son. He has a spending problem. He blows money on various electronic equipment, but most of these electronics are very expensive. I've threatened to leave once before because he spent the last of our money on something of that nature, and my son ran out of diapers, so we had to get family to wire us money until the next paycheck. He will lie straight to my face unless i catch him red-handed. I feel no trust in my marriage and i find myself questioning all of his actions and it is driving us both crazy. I recently questioned him about a particular purchase, and denied it but i found the receipt (the 333$ receipt) and i'm outraged. I am currently a stay-at-home mom, so he is our only source of income. It's obvious he is taking advantage of the fact that i am not working because he thinks i need his money so i will just put up with it, but i am so fed up and destroyed over his lies and sneakiness. I've thought about a trial separation but i don't know if that would do any good. I need someone else's advice.
amaysngrace Posted March 14, 2006 Posted March 14, 2006 I am currently a stay-at-home mom, so he is our only source of income. It's obvious he is taking advantage of the fact that i am not working because he thinks i need his money so i will just put up with it, but i am so fed up and destroyed over his lies and sneakiness. OMG....this sounds like de ja vu of my life! i so know what you mean!! it's horrible how some people can treat others so badly, i know. if you suggest a trial separation, my guess is he'll either get pissed and storm off, leaving you and the baby penniless, or he will cry worse than your son does and promise he will change. it's about control...he has it and you don't. OMG...this is awful. do yourself a favor and look up narcissist on the internet and see if that doesn't ring a bell, okay? i'm here from time to time...i will try to look for you
CaliGuy Posted March 15, 2006 Posted March 15, 2006 Yeesh. His priorities are screwed up. This is why getting married young isn't such a great idea. But, what's done is done. I would suggest you sit him down and explain that he has a duty to make his family first, not his electronic expenses and that if he continues to spend money on toys instead of making sure his family is taken care of, you will walk. And be prepared to follow through on your threat.
tikigods Posted March 15, 2006 Posted March 15, 2006 I agree your baby is the important thing in this, and if he can't realise that and stop spending money then its time to take care of the child and walk. Be sure that he knows this and that its important to you though. My concern would be if he is lying about buying stuff like that then what else would he be willing to lie about
Guest Posted March 15, 2006 Posted March 15, 2006 Be sure that he knows this and that its important to you though. My concern would be if he is lying about buying stuff like that then what else would he be willing to lie about I agree with that and that is also one of my concerns. It makes me feel like i dont even know who my husband is anymore, like i married a stranger. It's such a horrible feeling.
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