justhavetoletgo Posted March 13, 2006 Posted March 13, 2006 Is it better to get rid of the stuff she gave me or just the things that remind me of her? I have gotten rifdof the pictures and everything like that............all I have left is the gifts she gave me over the relationship and from her parents.............is it best to just part ways with these things? like clothes to salvation army or something? what have yo guys one or what do you think is best? in my case there are a couple significant things she gave me that I think will remind me of her way to much.........1) a golf bag I golf alot and well half the round is deciding what club you are going to use next and that involves looking at the bag 2) a down feather comforter I sleep with the damn thing every night I love it so much its amazing but its always going to be there..............suggestions???????? thanks
KittenMoon Posted March 13, 2006 Posted March 13, 2006 I'm kinda going through this right now. I am appalled at the idea of getting rid of everything that reminds me of him- I'd be emptying out half my apt! Everything has some memory attached to him. So I've decided functional items will have to stay, regardless (your comforter would be an example, unless it's sentimental value truly shadows its functionality). Pictures will probably have to be boxed but I have no intention of getting rid of the chronicles of my life (we were together 6 years including all of college for me). Notes will be hidden away, awaiting their fate, which I will not decide lightly. Sentimental gifts will be kept, although they may need to be out of sight for a while. I kinda think keeping things around will help you heal. Just like you don't want to box up your emotions, by boxing up too many physical memories you will never desensitize to them. And if you just throw them away, I think that's a lot of disrespect to the time you spent with someone, unless of course the experience ended so badly you truly want to remove them from your memory (mine didn't end like that). I asked my ex-bf not to box up or closet one particularly emotional gift ( stuff animal) I gave him. I could when I asked tell he had no intention to. The pain we're experiencing now does not need to be compounded by gettin rid of something that someday may remind of fond memories, better kept.
CaliGuy Posted March 13, 2006 Posted March 13, 2006 Put everything in a box, tape it up and store it somewhere that's not easy for you to find. You shouldn't throw the stuff away but also shouldn't make it easy to reminisce, you know?
Delicaterose00 Posted March 13, 2006 Posted March 13, 2006 I would say that you need to do whatever makes you feel ok. I couldnt keep the things. I threw everything out, even the clothes, I gave him back all the jewlery except one neckless he got me and one his parents got me... I felt the relationship was a lie so I didnt want to see any of it, plus it made me even more depressed. You need to do what makes you feel ok. If your tempted to go in the box or tempted to engulf it in flames but dont really want to knowing in the end youll be fine having the stuff..you can have a fmaily member or friend hold the box for ya. But, its whatever you feel. I have stuff from other ex's, pictures and a few cards.. but I dindt feel as I did with this guy, so I threw it all out.. lmao...
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