lilmisskim Posted March 13, 2006 Posted March 13, 2006 hi im not gonna go into a long story but, i was with my partner for for years it wasnt very positive it was quite abusive, unfaithfull but something kept me there i was no angel i must say!!! cut a long story short we split up because it was getting rediculas no trust he was well insucure, so was i it was a mess. we split up end of 2004, didnt hear or see him for eight months then i saw him one day and we ended up going home together and everything was going really well, i was happy he was happy we were doing our own thing not as such couse we were togerther everyday then the abbusive behaviour started again because i would go out and he didnt want me to.. so i left again didnt see or speak to him for 6 months then i saw him again 3 weeks ago and the same thing spent everyday with him... i love him i cant leave him were not good for eachother, he shouted at me the other day and i was so scared that he would never see me again i just cried i cant leave him how do you get over him he is no good for me he's violent aggressive what do i do? i feel like i need him.. i dont want to spend the rest of my life in this its been 5 years now..
tikigods Posted March 13, 2006 Posted March 13, 2006 you don't need him and you need to make sure you avoid him in any and all ways. He isn't going to change, he is always going to be abusive towards you, he doesn't love you and how can you possibly love anyone that treats you with such disrespect. I say find a counslor so you can get help for your feeling that you aren't good enough and have to be in these types of situations
Just Visiting Posted March 13, 2006 Posted March 13, 2006 He is the drug and you are the addict. Get away from this man before it becomes more violent and scary. No one deserves to be treated this way.
sexyLMC Posted March 13, 2006 Posted March 13, 2006 first of all ive got to say * big hugs * aww hunny this is really terrible.. every break up is hard but its even harder when you feel the other person wont share the pain you have, wont cry the nights you cry e.c.t and i can probably guess that thats how your feelings at the moment. because he doesnt repsect you.. go and look at your self in a mirrow and look at how actually beautiful you are.. i believe you only get one life hunny so spend it what ever way you want to. i wouldnt be able to spend my life feelings unhappy and frightened hunny.. and you dont have to.. just get up and walk away.. you've done it before you can do it again.. be a stronger person hun.. by the sounds of it you can do so much better.. i dont mean to sonds nasty hun ok i really dont but if you walk away ok your heart will heal.. i swear it will, but what if one day the violence gets worse. maybe one of them scars wont heal hunny.. i really hope your ok and leave him for good.. hugs. lisa x
penkitten Posted March 14, 2006 Posted March 14, 2006 yes, you really can get over him, if you want to. if there were something to give you persuasion to do so. obvisously, most of us really want to feel needed and we really want to feel loved. sometimes after we are in a relationship for a while, we begin to like the drive that it gives us , even if it is bad and yes, sometimes we like the drama. its perfectally normal even if no one likes to admit it. however, if there was someone of the other sex, who had a fondness for you, and was trying to persuade you to leave the relationship you are in, and you liked them and the attention you were getting from them, you would listen to their advise and follow thru with breaking up with this person and away from the absusive relationship. but since there is no one helping you transition into the breakup, and make it a little smoother on you, you will have to listen to yourself. you are saying that although you love this person, the relationship is not right and you are not right for each other and you want out. do it and do it now. no person is a drug, you do not need them to survive. you lived your life before they were in it, and you can certainly do so without them in it. sure breakups are hard, but just listen to that one song over and over " i will survive"!!
lilmisskim Posted March 14, 2006 Posted March 14, 2006 first of all ive got to say * big hugs * aww hunny this is really terrible.. every break up is hard but its even harder when you feel the other person wont share the pain you have, wont cry the nights you cry e.c.t and i can probably guess that thats how your feelings at the moment. because he doesnt repsect you.. go and look at your self in a mirrow and look at how actually beautiful you are.. i believe you only get one life hunny so spend it what ever way you want to. i wouldnt be able to spend my life feelings unhappy and frightened hunny.. and you dont have to.. just get up and walk away.. you've done it before you can do it again.. be a stronger person hun.. by the sounds of it you can do so much better.. i dont mean to sonds nasty hun ok i really dont but if you walk away ok your heart will heal.. i swear it will, but what if one day the violence gets worse. maybe one of them scars wont heal hunny.. i really hope your ok and leave him for good.. hugs. lisa x Thanks lisa i know exactly what you saying i do wake up crying.. i actually go to sleep crying i feel like i have a stomach ache if i feel he dont want to see me..... its crazy and hard i have never felt like this and i never want to feel like this again, i woke up with him this morning and i thought what am i doing here i walked out without giving him a kiss thats not normal for me. i know i will get over him its just how long x
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