elisabeth160 Posted March 12, 2006 Posted March 12, 2006 Why do people play games? I hate them. They make things so much more complicated and add drama. Yet I've founf myself unknowingly doing the same... ill give the back story quickly. I became friends with this guy. We got close, I developed feelings. He started going back out with his ex girlfriend. I was hurt so I told him I had feelings for him. We remained friends but then started hooking up secretly. We've slept together a few times. We also work at the same place. Things started getting akward because I was becoming too sensative with the relationship. And he noticed, and began to back off. I'd want to hang out and he never could, supposedly. So seeing this I felt the need to back off from him. Its hard because we work @ the same place. I use to go over and visit his dept when I was off for hours and just joke, say hi as I walked by, take our breaks and lunches together. But that all started to stop. So I pulled back and only visited him rarely because when I did he seemed distant... But once I start backing off he comes on stronger, and asks me why I don't come say hi anymore. He asked me again yesterday. Why was I ignoring him, iwhy don't I come over and talk to him like I use to, or am not being the same. I told him because he doesn't talk to me when I do and he denied it. What should I do? I want to be myself and be around him, but when I do I fel like I'm pushing it on him, and he becomes distant. When I don't he complains. Why do people play games like this??? Why can't u just show someone u like being around them without playing hard to get? Help! Some advice and opinions would help a lot! Thanku!!!
whichwayisup Posted March 12, 2006 Posted March 12, 2006 Just tell him it's very unfair to YOU to be friendly with him after what happened between you two, and that you can't handle 'just' being friends with him. He's an idiot and trust me, he KNOWS why you've backed off. All I can tell you, he is NOT your friend. If he was, and if he any respect for you, he would have taken the time to explain to you that what you two had was over, that he is with his girlfriend now. He seems to be enjoying the extra attention you give him, as long as it's by HIS rules. If you pursue him in any way now, he'll snub you and the walls will go up again...Then you back, he'll come find you. Stop allowing him to do this to you. Realize that what you had with him is over and leave him alone. Ofcourse it hurts, but you have to do this for yourself. Find a single man who will love just you.
magda Posted March 12, 2006 Posted March 12, 2006 People play games for that very reason.. because when they don't they do not get the results they want. He's only interested in you when you're not as interested, plain and simple - he wants the chase, he wants what he "can't have". As soon as you need something from him, he backs away because it's not fun and games anymore. When people find someone they can see themselves having a relationship with they usually don't pull away, come back, and go back and forth about it.
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