justhavetoletgo Posted March 11, 2006 Posted March 11, 2006 Well I just want to say never break NC its the worst thing you can do............I absolutely hate myself I am in so much pain again and all because I have no smarts upstairs! after she sent me the final txt message wednesday she called me 16 yes 16 times i never answered then she sends me a txt message...."this is extremely important you need to pick up your phone or answer my txts............I replied and said whats wrong she then said please please pick up your phone like a stupid dumb moron next time she called I did and what does she say????????? why won't you talk to me I just wanted to die...........now that I have time to think about it I don't even know what I expected her to say I guess I was hoping that she would well but she didn't and I am such a mess right now she was contacting me everyday its been 2 days ad i suspect she won't try for awhile............she said if I didn't talk to her how .........would we know if we could ever get back.........judging by the phone conversation she was just saying that so in case she needs me I am there thats why I am so mad so please people when they try and contact you do not break NC,.................I assume in a while this will happen again as she said well I won't bother you for awhile near the end of the phone call..........what is the best thing to do next time? obviously i am not going to break nc but is there anything that makes it easier..............oh yah i tried the phone off.....she just called the house..............please advice
tikigods Posted March 11, 2006 Posted March 11, 2006 change your number! SEriously, if this girl is going to call you this much, call up the phone company and get your number changed. Problem solved
In Sync Posted March 11, 2006 Posted March 11, 2006 ............I absolutely hate myself I am in so much pain again and all because I have no smarts upstairs! ..............please advice Don't make something more complicated than it is. If you CHOSE to break NC..and it is your choice...then in the future try being direct? Try this: "What do YOU want...to break my balls here?" OR "STOP harassing me with all these calls. It's boring and and immature." OR "STOP calling me!" (but then with this later version you don't need to break NC to get this point across) Take responsibilty for what drama you want or don't in your life...leaving it in her hands to decide for you is a victim position aka "I have no smarts upstairs!"
qnmc Posted March 11, 2006 Posted March 11, 2006 Great point, InSync... Take back the power. The best way to take back your power is to do something about it. Before changing your number, can have her calls blocked, both on your cell and home? I know you can have emails and IMs blocked. If she does contact you again, or she goes out of her way to just "happen" to run into you... try explaining to her that you are moving on with your life and you can't do it with her in it. I'd tell her that if it's a friendship wants, she should check back with you in a couple years. "how .........would we know if we could ever get back" You're right, this is a cheap shot on her part meant to keep you hanging.
clynn Posted March 11, 2006 Posted March 11, 2006 "how .........would we know if we could ever get back" We??? We???? Was the break up decision mutual? OR just her? Why is she saying we? Geeeeeze, this must be very hard for you. It sounds as though she is still entertainining ideas of you guys getting back together. I guess it really is up to you ultimately, if you can handle waiting around while she tries to figure things out, then you may want to stay in contact. But for now it sounds too difficult for you to do that, so I guess you'll have to be strong and ignore her altogether.
qnmc Posted March 11, 2006 Posted March 11, 2006 on the chance that she does want you back, for now you're better off maintaining NC. it's human nature want what we can't have. if you were to jump back into her life it would more than likely lower your interest as you would become "too available." regardless, i would mentally just move on. sounds like you're better off without her and you'll realize this in time. NC will help you heal faster in the long run.
In Sync Posted March 12, 2006 Posted March 12, 2006 P.S. Don't get any illusions that her calling excessively is real "wanting to get back" together...even the ones who break it off feel withdrawals pains from those they cut loose. They are quite shock when confronted with NC. Don't be deceived...she'll say and play with words that will leave you guessing but it's her ego that is operating now. The only advantage she has in her withdrawal is the knowledge she ended it. You respond anymore things won't change, she's the same girl that decided before that she didn't want to be with you...You respond anymore you'll continue to feel like a putz.
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