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Posted

i'm a single woman, met a man on internet dating service, he lives across the country

he will pay my ticket to come see him, and i will stay in his apartment with him- he says he can't leave his job

i want to meet him in my own area, i want him to travel, because i'd feel more safe

am i being paranoid?

i think he could take only a couple days off to meet someone important

 

women- did you travel for the first date or did he?

how far would you travel, under what circumstances would you say no?

Posted

YES, i would say no.

 

this guy could be anyone. if you feel at all unsure (and you should), trust that. never put yourself in a position where you would be far from home in the apartment of a man you don't know.

 

meet him somewhere you feel comfortable with, take friends along, meet in the daytime in a public place and leave if you feel at all uncomfortable (more than just the normal nerves, i mean).

 

if he's worth it and if he really likes you, he shouldn't only not mind all of the above, he should insist on them, for your sake.

 

be careful. there are all sorts of freaks out there. you feel unsure for a reason. please don't override that instinct with 'but if i don't he'll.....'

 

he'll nothing. if he's a good guy, as i said, he won't mind.

Posted

Stay in a hotel. Don't invite him to your room. Don't go to his place. And pay attention to your gut. If it says 'uh-oh; this isn't good' then LISTEN! Don't do anything that makes you the tiniest bit uncomfortable.

Posted

Ask him to come for a weekend. Surely he can do that.

 

If you do travel to see him, don't stay with him. Stay in a motel.

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