Guest Posted March 7, 2006 Posted March 7, 2006 I'm a single woman and I can date around. But I'm so totally confused by two men. Tell me what you would do- I'm in love with G, we've been in an LDR for one year. He wants to live together in the future, but because of circumstances too long to explain, it has to be a year from now at the very least. He's the best all around person I've ever met, very sweet, gentleman, handsome, good dresser, good job, I love his kids, my son loves him......he treats me so well. But I'm so lonely, and we only see each other on average a couple nights per month. He had my son and I at his house for almost a week with his kids, and took us on a florida vacation with them. I know that he's serious, but the wait is so long and lonely. The phone is all I have with him most nights and days. And my son needs a man in his every day life. I'm deeply in love with this man and he loves me as much. So because I'm so lonely, I decided to see what else was out there and found K on an internet dating site. We've known each other three months, and have never met in person, email/phone only. He's also very nice and funny and we get along very well so far. The difference is, he isn't as successful, but he doesn't want an LDR. His goals are marriage and family(so are mine). He wants to take my son as his own if we were to get married. We could build a better financial life together. We wouldn't be rich like G, but we'd be together and not in an LDR situation. I'm not in love with him like I am with G. He isn't as much of a gentleman as G and he isn't as refined. I'm not as impressed with him, frankly. But I really LIKE talking with him, and we have a lot in common. I could learn to love him. We would have to meet in person first and see. I don't know if I should take the risk. I don't want to hurt or betray G. He doesn't mean to string me along, but he can't give all I really need right now. And yet I am so in love with him. It isn't all about me, my son needs a father figure, and K would be that. As well as we really do get along well. Would you wait for your true love to become totally available, or would you try meeting someone else and see what happened? (I'm not talking about sex) Just to see how things would be with K... is it even fair to anyone involved? I've been literally in tears on and off all week at the thought of letting G go, but I'm sooooo lonely and want companionship.
whichwayisup Posted March 7, 2006 Posted March 7, 2006 If you love G, the first guy, then wait for him. Don't go with someone else cuz you're lonely. That isn't fair to the other guy, and chances are, if you DO love G more - Eventually you'll want to be with him again if circumstances change. Live with how things are, be lucky you have someone who loves you as much as you love him. Plus, each of you seem to mesh with eachother's kids.
Skeered Posted March 7, 2006 Posted March 7, 2006 Good things come to those who wait..if you love someone you don't just drop them because you are lonely...absence makes the heart grow fonder also...you do what you can to keep the energy alive in your relationship until you can be together.. Don't settle for what you feel might be 2nd best just so that you aren't alone. That's no way to make anything last.
Curmudgeon Posted March 7, 2006 Posted March 7, 2006 I'm in love with G I'm not in love with him like I am with G. That should be your answer right there.
Sassy Posted March 7, 2006 Posted March 7, 2006 Don't settle for less than go for the one that you love. Don't choose the other one just because you don't want to be alone. Wait till you can be with C . I think you already answered your question .
MWC_LifeBeginsAt40 Posted March 8, 2006 Posted March 8, 2006 patience.... I want it and I want it right now! Twice a month isn't bad for a LDR. I only wish I could meet someone who had two days a month to spend iwth me. It almost sounds like the guy #2 is in too much of a rush to find what HE wants and not interested in what you want. Guy #1 sounds very genuine and worth the wait.
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