headinclouds Posted March 5, 2006 Posted March 5, 2006 Quick question: How long did it take you all to say "I love you" to your significant other? My boyfriend and I have gone 10 months without saying it.... is this healthy for a relationship if we hold back? Cuz I am so happy to be with him..... and sometimes I doubt that he is with me because I haven't been given any sort of "i love you" clues.... and- honestly-it hurts.
bluechocolate Posted March 5, 2006 Posted March 5, 2006 If he's holding back, so are you. Is there some rule here about who is supposed to go first? Why haven't you told him? (if you love him, that is)
I Luv the Chariot OH Posted March 5, 2006 Posted March 5, 2006 The theory of "i love yous" states that both patries must exchange the phrase after the number of months constituting their ages, added togethers and the total squared, plus the number of relationships both of them have had, and the final answer is divided by two.
AmItheOne Posted March 5, 2006 Posted March 5, 2006 going on 2 years...no I love you yet, gettin kinda worried myself.
jerbear Posted March 5, 2006 Posted March 5, 2006 Now that formula, I plugged my information in and the calculator gave me a 10 months... it seems reasonable. Everyone has their own pace. I didn't say a thing till 1 year later and once I said it after 3 months. Some people it is said with actions. Actions like he calls you and says hi during the day for instance.
BlahBlahQueen Posted March 5, 2006 Posted March 5, 2006 lol... OK, I'm humoring the "formula", but I don't think I got it right. So you add your ages together, take the sum and square it, take the product and add the number of relationships to it, and then divide the sum by 2? That gives me... ages 22 + 22 = 44, square 44 to get 1936, add about 15 total relationships to get 1951, and divide it by 2 to get 975.5 months? That's a long-ass time!
I Luv the Chariot OH Posted March 5, 2006 Posted March 5, 2006 Did I say squared? I meant the square root of. Sorry, it's been a while since high school.
BlahBlahQueen Posted March 5, 2006 Posted March 5, 2006 Ahh, that's more like it. I got 10.8 months. Still too long, in my opinion. Experience tells me that if I haven't fallen in love within a couple of months, I never will.
AmItheOne Posted March 5, 2006 Posted March 5, 2006 ok...I got 11 months so should I ditch him, haha. Guess its my fault too, as I haven't said it either but he has dealt with a bad divorce, I haven't, so I want it to be him that says it first. He has said there is a certain "point" he is not ready to cross...but damn, almost 2 years its like cross it already
Elisa_Boo Posted March 5, 2006 Posted March 5, 2006 We have been 2gether for almost 2 yrs. and at 1st he said "it" then took it back and didn't say it for about a year and then on Valentines day he wrote me the sweetiest letter tellin me he loved me and was sorry for not sayin' it
Madeleine Posted March 5, 2006 Posted March 5, 2006 I've posted before about my boyfriend's lack of those words so i was naturally intruiged about Chariot's theory. Just one question though - how do you define the beginning of a relationship? Here's why i ask - * We first started talking (online) in May 2004. * We first met in person in Nov 2004 and dated on a weekly basis. * We became officially boyfriend/girlfriend in June 2005 (told the world, met each others' families etc.) Ok, so the relevant number of months Chariot's theory produces for us is 19. * 19 months from when we became official takes us to Jan 2007. * 19 months from when we first met in person takes us to June 2006. * 19 months from when we first "met" online took us to Dec 2005. In Dec 2005 he called me up and said "i love you" a number of times, (although he was drunk!) BUT, it was exactly 19 months from when we first "met" online. How spooky!!
brightskies Posted March 14, 2006 Posted March 14, 2006 My bf and I have known each other since Dec., started dating in Jan., and have been officially exclusive since last week. He said "I think I'm falling in love with you," and, "I love you," last week, the very day I agreed to be his gf. Then I said "I've been falling for you for a long time." But I haven't said "I love you" -- they seem like stronger words. Not sure why I'm hesitant since I don't want anyone else. Just nervous, I guess. Lately, I can tell that he wants to say it but is holding back because I won't say it yet. Don't give up hope. Does he tend to be reserved with his emotions and words? Are you mutually affectionate? Do you "feel" that he loves you? Sometimes, you can tell a lot more from how he behaves towards you than from what he says. Although it's definitely nice to hear those sweet words now and again.
basscatcher Posted March 14, 2006 Posted March 14, 2006 Now that formula, I plugged my information in and the calculator gave me a 10 months... it seems reasonable. Everyone has their own pace. I didn't say a thing till 1 year later and once I said it after 3 months. Some people it is said with actions. Actions like he calls you and says hi during the day for instance. This is sooooo my Charlie Bear.....for 5 months we have been seeing each other 3-6 days a week- he calls me every day sometimes mulitiple times a day and he says 'Hi, whatcha doin? I just wanted to touch base with you." or 'Hi, whatcha doin later?" I think he loves me but I pray for the day when I hear those words pass his lips to my ears and I can hug him, kiss him and say "I love you too thank you." (He already knows I love him. I remind him of it at least once a week. When the moment is right.)
Delectable Posted March 15, 2006 Posted March 15, 2006 I say it ... but Mr Wonderful doesn't and it's about 8 months for me. I guess sometimes it is more uncomfortable for me not to say it than for me to say it and be met with a kiss...squeeze...but ultimately silence. If you feel it...say it. Love is not a game
kitkat826 Posted March 15, 2006 Posted March 15, 2006 If you feel it...say it. Love is not a game Ditto. I have shared "I love you"s with three men in the past. They were the ones who said it first, and all within three weeks to two months. Of course, I also think that love grows and develops over time in a way that can't even be predicted at two months. But its my hunch that you should feel the desire to say it withing a couple of months.
brightskies Posted March 16, 2006 Posted March 16, 2006 Haha, scratch my previous post. I ended up saying "I love you" late last night/very early this morning because I couldn't help myself and I wanted to let him know
ddnnee Posted March 16, 2006 Posted March 16, 2006 "The theory of "i love yous" states that both patries must exchange the phrase after the number of months constituting their ages, added togethers and the total squared, plus the number of relationships both of them have had, and the final answer is divided by two." ok so, lets check out this math formula: [sQRT(Age1 + Age2) + (# relationship had)]/2 Say a guy 20 yo with 1 relationship and girl 18 yo with 12 relationships: [sQRT(38) + 13]/2 = 10 months. Say a guy 10 yo with 0 relationship and a girl 8 yo with 8 relationships: [sQRT(18) + 8]/2 = 6 months. Say a guy 40 yo with 2 relationship and a 38 yo with 50 relationships: [sQRT(78) + 52]/2 = 31 months. DIZZAM! did you get this out of a seventeen's rule book for girls?
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