joshua1983 Posted March 2, 2006 Posted March 2, 2006 Ok will summarise my story really quickly. I've been seeing this girl for about 9 months now. Getting her was damn hard & there were times when I thought I could not get her. She is my first love. We've had issues with my ex coming back, which she seemed alright with. And to make matters worse, her ex came back, said he loved her, and tried to kiss her. Obviously I was really upset, but we got through that. I've been in love with her for more than a year now. But just over the past few weeks something has felt weird. I still love her and want to be with her. But there was a period of a few days, where I thought other girls were attractive, I DO NOT want to get with them. I am sure that this is the girl I want to marry. But something feels weird, maybe it is because the honeymoon period is finally over. But I really really love this girl, and if I'm going to fall out of love with her, I would just rather end it now. It would kill me to break her heart. But sometimes I can't help wondering if this is the be all of end all, or not. I have had this feeling once before, but it disappeared. For brief moments I think I might be over her, but then I realise I love her again (normally I think about what it would be like 2 be without her, and it really hurts, and I realise I love her again). But i certainly DO NOT want to be over her. And it feels so wrong to feel I have no feelings, even if it is for a second. Maybe its because before nothing was stable, and I was incontrollably in love with her. Now everything is stable, and I'm in a comfort zone (which is good don't get me wrong). What do you think guys? What is this weirdness I have been feeling over the past month or so? My friends always say love is a decision, is that true? Thanks in advance
Walk Posted March 3, 2006 Posted March 3, 2006 My 2 cents... I think I kind of run between the two feelings you're talking about. Partly because I do get too comfortable, and start to take my partner for granted. I think it's fairly normal to have periods of less or more emotional connection. It doesn't sound like you are falling out of love with her to me. More that the "thrill of the chase" is gone now, and so is the intensity of the emotions that came from that. Love will go away if it's not continually re-filled. So do things that create that emotional connection with her.
Author joshua1983 Posted March 4, 2006 Author Posted March 4, 2006 Hey thanks for the advice. Its just very hard at the moment, as she is busy with university exams, and I am inundated with work. We're both really busy, and its just hard atm to go out and do special things. I guess I'm also just really bored with life atm...I mean I can't complain, but yea maybe thats the issue. Random questions: is finding other women attractive normal if u are in a relationship? I mean ppl look at porno whilst in a relationship, so is it wrong to think other girls are hot (in a sexual way). If u do, duz it mean you're not in love? I mean after all fantasies are fantasies right?
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