Guinevere04 Posted February 27, 2006 Posted February 27, 2006 My boyfriend and I have been dating for a year and a 1/2. All we have done is argue for the last 6 months. We love each other but we are both SICK of it. We have broken up about once a month for the last 8-10 months and I just cant take any more. We tried to take a romantic vacation this weekend and he seemed to have an attitude on friday, saturday was decent until he wanted to bring up a guy friend of mine that I have explained until I cant anymore and then Sunday we had our usual "last-day-of-the-vacation" blow out. We love each other, no question, but we just cant get along. He keeps saying that he will do whatever it takes when we are broken up and then when we get back together, nothing changes between us. We have tried to figure out our problems but I really think we are just too much alike and dont really compliment each other. I am 6 years older than he is and I didnt really see a difference in the beginning but over time I have found that he is a little immature. I'm not trying to put him down, but it is a difference. I have put up a wall because I know we cant get along. He keeps an attitude too. I am tired of trying to fix this and have the same outcome. What should we do? Do I need to wait until he has had enough? We still love on each other, have great sex, have decent conversations if we dont bring up touchy subjects like exhusbands or exwives, we have fun going out and would both do anything in the world for each other if we needed the other. But I am sick of arguing, life is too short. When I say these things to him, he says I am being mean. I'm not, we just deserve happiness. I wish that we could end on good terms, with love in our hearts, just knowing that it didnt work. Rather than beating a dead horse and end up hating each other.
zarathustra Posted February 27, 2006 Posted February 27, 2006 If you both love each other, then why do you need walls and attitude? I think that if you love each other, then you should exercise all options prior to giving up. Have you considered couples counselling? Its not just for married people anymore. If you can't afford it, buy a book or look up relationship building sites on the internet.
Author Guinevere04 Posted February 27, 2006 Author Posted February 27, 2006 If you both love each other, then why do you need walls and attitude? I think that if you love each other, then you should exercise all options prior to giving up. Have you considered couples counselling? Its not just for married people anymore. If you can't afford it, buy a book or look up relationship building sites on the internet. I have done the book, I have looked up tons of sites, I do my owen counseling for other issues and have talked about this. I just feel like we bring each other down. Neither of us want to be the first to let the other go.
zarathustra Posted February 28, 2006 Posted February 28, 2006 If you feel you've exercised all options and still feel this way, then you two should part ways. Heck, someone always has to do be the bad guy in these situations... you just gotta figure out if beeing free from each other is important enough to you do what needs to be done.
Author Guinevere04 Posted March 1, 2006 Author Posted March 1, 2006 My now ex and I had decided that we would talk about our options Monday night. I tried to call him twice and he never answered. The next morning I got a text message saying that he was sorry he missed my call. Whatever, shows how important it was that he couldnt even call me the next day, had to hide behind a text message. So I called him about lunch time and said, we both know, do we need it spelled out? He said that he did. I said, well considering you didnt have enough interest in it to talk to me last night, I think you know. He said are we breaking up because I am tired of this BS, I said absolutely and hung up. That was yesterday at noon and I havent talked to him since and have no desire. I'm sick and tired of being sick and tired. I just hope that he doesnt try calling me like he always has before. I am really done this time.
clynn Posted March 1, 2006 Posted March 1, 2006 I'm guessing the reason he didn't phone you was because he knew it was a break up talk and he was probably hoping it wouldn't happen. It is too bad it ended on a nasty note.
zarathustra Posted March 2, 2006 Posted March 2, 2006 My now ex and I had decided that we would talk about our options Monday night. I tried to call him twice and he never answered. The next morning I got a text message saying that he was sorry he missed my call. Whatever, shows how important it was that he couldnt even call me the next day, had to hide behind a text message. So I called him about lunch time and said, we both know, do we need it spelled out? He said that he did. I said, well considering you didnt have enough interest in it to talk to me last night, I think you know. He said are we breaking up because I am tired of this BS, I said absolutely and hung up. That was yesterday at noon and I havent talked to him since and have no desire. I'm sick and tired of being sick and tired. I just hope that he doesnt try calling me like he always has before. I am really done this time. Guinevere, with regards to hoping that he doesn't try calling you, that's his choice. However, you have a choice too. You have the choice to not pick up his call. That's the beauty of call display and voice mail. Good luck to you and I wish you all the best. Z
Guest Posted March 2, 2006 Posted March 2, 2006 I think it will get harder as the days go by and then it will get easier. I miss his company already but I dont miss the arguing. He had some awesome qualities and we had some awesome times together. But so many times were ruined with unnecessary fights. It's a relief to know that I can start fresh and hope that he will find someone that makes him happy. I wish, too, that it hadnt ended nasty but unfortunately, I feel like that is the only way we both wouldnt still be holding on.
Recommended Posts