pistol Posted February 27, 2006 Posted February 27, 2006 I have posted here before and have received some great advice, I find my emotions so torn between what I should do, remain with no contact or try to become a friend even though I want more. My ex girlfriend and I of three years split up about four months ago, after a two month period of no contact immediately after she bombarded me with texts, completely to my surprise. I agreed to meet her and we spent time ( two weeks) in close contact again and everything was fantastic. But I knew deep down that I wanted more than friendship, which from her text messages I gathered she wanted as well. Later she stated that with all her problems, bulimia, anorexia, manic depression she needed to sort out all her problems before she could even contemplate entering a relationship. I knew that I couldn't just be friends and it would mess my head up again, which contact was doing. I had to break free, half hoping that she would reconsider, it has now been three weeks and we haven't spoken in anyway, and I do feel better, but I still really miss her, part of me wants to help her and be her friend, but I know that it would be with the wrong motives. I know I would be her friend and secretly wanting her to want to get back together. In which case I'm not really her friend. But I'm also worried that by walking away I will lose her forever. I'm sure many of us have been through this situationof no contact, would anyone be kind enough to give me some advice. I'm so confused.
zarathustra Posted February 27, 2006 Posted February 27, 2006 I think you should try hard to let go. She is responsible for her disorders (I am a recovering bulimic). She's the one who is choosing to deal with them on her own. She's made the choice simple for you. She needs to know that each choice she makes has consequences. If she chooses to not be with you in a relationship, she need to recognize that the consequence is to lose you as a friend too. That's just my humble opinion.
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