thisisarandomperson Posted February 25, 2006 Posted February 25, 2006 Just wondering what do you people think? How important is intelligence in your partner? Is your partner a bit ditsy, has stupid moments, or is super intelligence? Just curious to know
My_Other_I Posted February 25, 2006 Posted February 25, 2006 Stupid moments are fun. We all have those, overall. I prefer my partners to be quite intelligent.
Guest Posted February 25, 2006 Posted February 25, 2006 For me it is the most important quality in a women to have, for most young people in the age bracket of 16-25 it's not that important. Most extremely intelligent people are rarely in a relationship when they are young. Society and young women in general tend to care more about looks and the outgoing nature of a person(i.e the movie celebrity lifestyle) when they are young. Good character is not that much of an issue. However, after women get older (in their late 30s and above) intelligence becomes very important because intelligent guys are better equipped to raise their kids, hold down a job and are much more honest and trustworthy.
littlepiggy1 Posted February 25, 2006 Posted February 25, 2006 I prefer intelligence, but also a willingness to get stupid from time to time.
Curmudgeon Posted February 25, 2006 Posted February 25, 2006 Extremely important. I wanted a wife who was my educational, intellectional, professional equal and that's who and what I was fortunate enough to marry (the second time around). It's wonderful being able to carry on an intelligent, adult conversation; challenging and fun. She may be a bit clutzy at times but that merely part of her charm. I can be silly enough for both of us and she gives as good as she gets.
Outcast Posted February 25, 2006 Posted February 25, 2006 Actually, it may not so much be 'intelligence' as 'intellectual aptitude and interest'. Good conversation is one of the great delights of life and that can only be had with someone who is not just bright, but open-minded and interested in life and the world. You can have some exceedingly narrow-minded intelligent people just as you can have intelligent people who are interested in exactly two topics of conversation. So intellect is important but there's much more to it than just intellect.
cal gal Posted February 25, 2006 Posted February 25, 2006 Intelligence is extremely high on the priority list, as well as humor.... which at times go hand in hand....
Art_Critic Posted February 25, 2006 Posted February 25, 2006 Actually, it may not so much be 'intelligence' as 'intellectual aptitude and interest'. Good conversation is one of the great delights of life and that can only be had with someone who is not just bright, but open-minded and interested in life and the world. You can have some exceedingly narrow-minded intelligent people just as you can have intelligent people who are interested in exactly two topics of conversation. So intellect is important but there's much more to it than just intellect. Yeah.. what she said
Curmudgeon Posted February 25, 2006 Posted February 25, 2006 No argument here. My wife is interested, engaged, more open-minded than I am (I'm still a work in progress), centered, grounded and a whole lot of fun. Unfortunately, an awful lot of very smart people have no common sense.
Becoming Posted February 25, 2006 Posted February 25, 2006 On a scale of 1-10, 10. As long as it's accompanied by a great sense of humor.
amerikajin Posted February 25, 2006 Posted February 25, 2006 I think you have to date someone is basically your equal. You can expect that there will be ways in which your partner is your superior, and there will be ways in which you are hers/his. But generally, when you add it all up, it's got to be in the same range. It's simply a matter of respect...if you don't respect your partner on all levels, you will take them for granted. The woman of my dreams doesn't have to be Einstein but she needs to be deep; she must be able to hold a long, thoughtful, reflective conversation once in a while. I've dated down in that department, and it wasn't long before I wanted out. I thought her just being a sweetheart could compensate for that which was missing, but it simply didn't meet my needs. I am not looking for a genius, because I don't consider myself a genius; I consider myself above average on the intel scale, so I suppose that's what I look for in return. Nothing more, nothing less.
jen_jen_heartbroken Posted February 25, 2006 Posted February 25, 2006 Intelligence is just as important in a mate as the quality of their moral fiber. As much as I am attracted to very intelligent men, I have found many of them have focused so much on expanding their education that they have ignored expanding their emotional intelligence. It doesn't do me much good to be with a man who can engineer a power plant, but is an emotional cripple. I've tried my best to nurture both sides of my brain -- but perhaps that's a woman thing.
Sand&Water Posted February 25, 2006 Posted February 25, 2006 I agree with Outcast, and Becoming. Intelligence is at the top of my list. Almost always intelligence goes hand-in-hand with humour, and that's what I expect in the guy I choose to be with; definately brings a big chunk of spark in a relationship. Being able to actively participate in deep, thoughtful, meaningful and intellectual conversations is what keeps a relationship alive. Sometimes, I have noticed in the past, intelligent people tend to be arrogant. All in all, its rare to find an intelligent good hearted man.
johan Posted February 25, 2006 Posted February 25, 2006 Dumb chicks are easier to deal with. Smart ones think of too much stuff to argue about all the time.
sazzya1987 Posted February 25, 2006 Posted February 25, 2006 My boyfriend is intelligent, especially on computers! Thats what I need in a relationship because I love going on computers and if it goes wrong I'm a little bit stuck
Woggle Posted February 25, 2006 Posted February 25, 2006 It is a must. I can't be with an idiot no matter how good she looks.
witabix Posted February 25, 2006 Posted February 25, 2006 How dumb am I? Physicists discovered that electrons have mass, and I didn't even know they were Catholic.
BlahBlahQueen Posted February 25, 2006 Posted February 25, 2006 Dumb chicks are easier to deal with. Smart ones think of too much stuff to argue about all the time. LMAO! But seriously, though, that's not true in my experience. Dumb chicks are just as prone to drama, except they dig up drama about dumb s*** and back it up with dumb arguments.
Woggle Posted February 25, 2006 Posted February 25, 2006 LMAO! But seriously, though, that's not true in my experience. Dumb chicks are just as prone to drama, except they dig up drama about dumb s*** and back it up with dumb arguments. Nothing worse than a dumb chick trying to rationalize herself.
kitkat826 Posted February 25, 2006 Posted February 25, 2006 For me, intellectual curiosity and open-mindedness are more important than our traditional sense of "intelligence". I don't care if you've read a thousand books or scored perfect on the SAT's...are you curious about the world and can hold a stimulating conversation with me on a topic of mutual interest? Formal education is nice, but a career to which you are dedicated and are exceling in is more important. I plan on continuing my education to get my Ed.D....but the guy I'm dating has his associate's degree and I don't think is planning on going past a bachelor's. However he is an air traffic controler, was trained by the military for six years, has plans to get to the top of his field, and makes more money than I ever will. Plus, I like that his intellectual capabilities are in an area completely different than mine....I could never work in aviation because I suck in everything math, engineering and physics related. Third, and JUST as important is common sense. All the above goes out of the window without it.
Becoming Posted February 25, 2006 Posted February 25, 2006 This is an interesting thread because we've managed to name different kinds of intelligences. I agree with jen about emotional intelligence; that's an important part of the mix. Open-mindedness, definitely. Intelligence without some kind of moral character is scary to me. And ya gotta love those Catholic electrons!
jen_jen_heartbroken Posted February 25, 2006 Posted February 25, 2006 Formal education is nice, but a career to which you are dedicated and are exceling in is more important. That is important, so long as it doesn't cross that fine line into workaholism. Workaholics by definition usually put everything else, including their primary relationships, second to their job.
TheSwordfish Posted February 25, 2006 Posted February 25, 2006 My girl needs to be intellegent, absolutely. Intelligence turn's me on. I don't mean just being smart. But having a brain, and style. Intelligent girls will actually think about relationships. I need someone who can relativate. If a girl isn't intelligent, I will run.
MrsHellFire Posted February 26, 2006 Posted February 26, 2006 I think character is the most important. Everyone has all these high standards when they are looking for the ONE to marry, but somehow that doesn't stop them from getting bored and cheating the next year. Not going to keep a marriage together. True love + character, which are really the most hard to come by.
bab Posted February 26, 2006 Posted February 26, 2006 I think all in all it's about intelligence compatability for me. I gotta have intelligence, but I also can't have someone who is drastically more intelligent than I am. I'm pretty geeky, and I a guy has to be okay with that for us to be in a comfortable relationship. I've got a good guy friend who is quite the philosopher and general deep thinker, his wife's intelligence falls within the business arena, and she could care less about deep questions. Although I don't think he'd ever physically cheat, I think given the chance, he'd jump at an EA.
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