lolax Posted February 24, 2006 Posted February 24, 2006 why is it that the sex i have with mm, is so damn good, i mean the earth does move!! fireworks go off even if he touches my leg...and when he kisses me i melt!! i hate giving blow jobs..yuk!!! but with mm i could do them all day long. i go as far to say i could even swallow . i hated sex before i met him ..truth really wasnt bothered if i ever did it again!!! but then boom ,here i am talking this way, what on earth has happened to me ? hes coming over later cant waitto sahg the life out of him !! does your married man have this affect on you?? and the positions........never knew they exsisted.....wow and the orgasms...un real
Lishy Posted February 24, 2006 Posted February 24, 2006 It is probably because he is forbidden fruit and you are in competition to keep him! Lets hope that someone does not talk about YOUR husband like that one day!
Yamaha Posted February 24, 2006 Posted February 24, 2006 It's so much better when your relstionship is based on passion. All you think about is pleasing each other. Life does not get in the way. If you had to be with him on a constant basis the spice would not be as sweet. Also, what Lishy said.
mopar crazy Posted February 24, 2006 Posted February 24, 2006 I have to agree w/ the above replies and it also could be it's just the way you feel about him. I felt the very same way when H and I started dating. He was (and still is) the best sex I ever had. I couldn't wait to be w/ him. Any touch and I would just melt. But now that we have been 2gether 15 years it's not as intense b/c of every day life (bills, children, housework, ect) We are just so exhausted we don't have that passion anymore. Him and the exOW didn't have all those worries or stress. To them it was just about being together and the sex. He didn't have to stress how she paid her bills, how she kept her house, how she raised her own children, b/c they didn't have that relationship. Sex is a lot more wild and fun when you don't have those things to share. I work w/ several women in their 40's and they all agree that sex is just not what it use to be when they first dated their H and got M. One said that she was looking at the ceiling and wondering "Hmmm, I wonder if I should repaint the ceiling?" while her and her H were having sex, lol. The newness of a relationship is what is so exciting. There are so many things to learn and experience w/ your new partner that it's exciting.
Sami_D Posted February 24, 2006 Posted February 24, 2006 I think sex with my MM is the best I've had because we're both in our 40s, both know what we want and how to ask for it, and (without going into details) we're very compatible. I won't say it's NEVER been so good with someone else, but for me, this is time and again the best... and it keeps getting better. I can't speak for all the other 'MM sex is great' stories, because I'm not everyone else. No idea why other people feel they can comment on situations they're not in.
scarletletter Posted February 24, 2006 Posted February 24, 2006 It is mind-blowing for me because I am in love with this man. I realize now that I have never been in love before him...its amazing the difference that it makes.
Sami_D Posted February 24, 2006 Posted February 24, 2006 LOVE..???? oh yeah... that tooo I take that for granted, I suppose (j/k)... Just the closeness that such intimacy with someone brings. Something I've always looked for, and then found. While he lives in a totally different city now, and we met online, we grew up just miles from each other, 8 months in age apart, same cultural references, and in addition all our other political, social, intellectual interests... it was so amazing when we first started chatting... like he was my long lost best mate or something. And he's Married. Life really pulls some stunts sometimes.
Lishy Posted February 24, 2006 Posted February 24, 2006 And he's Married. Life really pulls some stunts sometimes. I must say....... That isn't life pulling stunts, it's a decision you are both making with your eyes wide open!
Sami_D Posted February 24, 2006 Posted February 24, 2006 Oh yes, that true Lishy, for certain. I am definitely making this decision all on my own. I met him, I knew how I felt about him, and I've decided to commit to it.
Lishy Posted February 24, 2006 Posted February 24, 2006 It must be so hard to be in love with someone else's man. I would hate that feeling! It is hard enough when the guy is single at times! Love sucks!
Sami_D Posted February 24, 2006 Posted February 24, 2006 It must be so hard to be in love with someone else's man. I would hate that feeling! It is hard enough when the guy is single at times! Love sucks! Well I don't know what it's like to be in love with someone else's man. Slavery isn't something that's legal in my country. So I guess he's his own man.
blind_otter Posted February 24, 2006 Posted February 24, 2006 Well I don't know what it's like to be in love with someone else's man. Slavery isn't something that's legal in my country. So I guess he's his own man. Nice arguing semantics like that. Translation: It must be difficult to be involved with someone who is in a committed relationship with multiple individuals.
Sami_D Posted February 24, 2006 Posted February 24, 2006 Well yes, it is hard. Probably not for the reasons you'd like it to be, however. I KNOW how he feels about me. I KNOW what he wants. And yes, it is difficult to know that in this life most people will look down on him for doing what feels right for him. And yes, it is hard on the children living in a world where parents are condemned for realising their relationship is OVER.
blind_otter Posted February 24, 2006 Posted February 24, 2006 I dunno why you think I have a problem with it. Your personal life is on you. I was just responding to the semantics arguing, which irritates me when the other person's point was obvious. that is all.
Sami_D Posted February 24, 2006 Posted February 24, 2006 I dunno why you think I have a problem with it. Your personal life is on you. I was just responding to the semantics arguing, which irritates me when the other person's point was obvious. that is all. I suppose I can read the subtext.
castle26 Posted February 26, 2006 Posted February 26, 2006 It is probably because he is forbidden fruit and you are in competition to keep him! Lets hope that someone does not talk about YOUR husband like that one day! I have to disagree with this. When the MM is w/his OW, the W already lost this competition you talk about. You probably underestimate the passion that occurs between two people in an A. They both think about each other constantly and have an off-the charts S*X life, at least in my experience. Yeah, he is married to another, at least for now but that does not lessen the love these two can have for each other. W and XW, or BS who don't want to hear about it should not come to the OW/OM threads. And why does it seem that so many "X" W show up here to berate OW and tell them the H will NEVER LEAVE? I want to say "But that's what happened in YOUR M, didn't it?"
Ladylay Posted February 26, 2006 Posted February 26, 2006 why is it that the sex i have with mm, is so damn good, i mean the earth does move!! fireworks go off even if he touches my leg...and when he kisses me i melt!! i hate giving blow jobs..yuk!!! but with mm i could do them all day long. i go as far to say i could even swallow . i hated sex before i met him ..truth really wasnt bothered if i ever did it again!!! but then boom ,here i am talking this way, what on earth has happened to me ? hes coming over later cant waitto sahg the life out of him !! does your married man have this affect on you?? and the positions........never knew they exsisted.....wow and the orgasms...un real Hey its lust enjoy it:eek: .. forbidden fruit yadee yadaa. Everyone is entitled to good sex.
Lishy Posted February 26, 2006 Posted February 26, 2006 Castle let me make a few points 1. The passion shared between people having an affair is so intense because it is off limits and exciting! Any new relationship is exciting and full of lust. But the sneaking around and stealing moments makes it more so! He does not feel that with the wife anymore because they have been together so long and life gets in the way of passion - It is not very passionate talking about the morgage or the kids! 2. I have never had an affir and I have never been cheated on so I am not a bitter BS - I have no malice saying what I say, I am just stating the obvious! 3. If you loved someone so much you would leave your wife! Period! 4. The wife is not the loser in this situation, the OW is the loser all around. All she stands to gain is a lying devious man who cannot stay faithful and a guy who thinks it is fine to just slope off and meet another woman instead of having the balls to just leave his wife who he is seemingly so unhappy with! Who wants a guy like that? And why is so much time spent having a go at someone who does not conform to what you all want to hear?
For You I Will Posted February 26, 2006 Posted February 26, 2006 And why does it seem that so many "X" W show up here to berate OW and tell them the H will NEVER LEAVE? I want to say "But that's what happened in YOUR M, didn't it?" I agree w/you. Being the OW, we are going to deal w/heartache...that is just a known fact. It takes a strong woman to deal w/ these men...even though we want them to leave their Spouses. Every case is different, yet I think many of the MM have similar qualities, in leading 2 different lives, & being deceptive.
Chump64 Posted February 27, 2006 Posted February 27, 2006 During an affair, it's common for sex to be "amazing" for the betrayed spouse as well. Then s/he starts to wonder why. Why is my partner doing this new thing, or that new thing? Where has he practiced that technique? etc. Often a straying spouse tries and enjoys new things, then brings them home to share.
lindya Posted February 27, 2006 Posted February 27, 2006 why is it that the sex i have with mm, is so damn good, i mean the earth does move!! fireworks go off even if he touches my leg...and when he kisses me i melt!! i hate giving blow jobs..yuk!!! but with mm i could do them all day long. i go as far to say i could even swallow . i hated sex before i met him ..truth really wasnt bothered if i ever did it again!!! but then boom ,here i am talking this way, what on earth has happened to me ? hes coming over later cant waitto sahg the life out of him !! does your married man have this affect on you?? and the positions........never knew they exsisted.....wow and the orgasms...un real What's the relevance, to you - and your excitement - of him being married? I ask, because you refer to him as "MM" right the way through the post. It comes across, to me anyway, as if the situation and his marital status, rather than the man himself, is what is getting you going. You've mentioned that before you met this guy, you hated sex. Why do you think that was? Do you believe that the issues that caused you to hate sex magically disappeared when "MM" waved his wand ...or is the excitement of this situation temporarily distracting you from whatever deeper issues led to you having negative feelings about sex. Once the excitement wears off, or he decides that he wants to end the relationship, you may find yourself being confronted with those issues again. Not only with them, but potentially with the added emotional trauma of feeling used by this guy. Talking about your willingness to blow him all day might turn you on right now, but how are you going to feel about all that if he suddenly dumps you in order to work on his marriage? You sound like someone who's on a rollercoaster high right now...but various points in your post suggest to me that you might be ill-equipped to deal with the corresponding lows. It might be an idea to arrange some counselling in order to emotionally prepare yourself for the consequences of this relationship.
pisces writer Posted February 28, 2006 Posted February 28, 2006 sound like fun. lolax. we should all be so fortunate
newbby Posted February 28, 2006 Posted February 28, 2006 in answer to the original question, i think the whole relationship feels so addictive, thrilling, dramatic, including the sex, because you have absolutely no control of it. you have no control of this man, and it makes him very attractive. eventually, that loss of control makes itself felt in far more negative ways. you really have no control, you are thus, dependent. you have no control because he is never going to compromise. the whole relationship, suits him, not you. oh maybe for now, but soon as you really need something, that doesnt fit in with him, just watch. you have no control of him, means he has control of you. maybe not in the small ways, but in the most important. even being with him, without asking for exclusivity shows your willingness to please him. eventually, he will lose respect, if he has any for you in the first place.
RecordProducer Posted February 28, 2006 Posted February 28, 2006 Hmm, control, excitement, forbidden fruit... Let's talk about emotional intelligence. If you fell in love with a man and found out that he murdered his parents or children, you'd probably be disgusted and immediately fall out of love with this man. So your brain DOES control your emotions. If you meet a gorgeous guy who seems like the right one, but after a couple dates he tells you that he had raped his sister, would you accept a date #3? I don't think so. So when you know that someone is married, you actually let yourself fall in love with him. You're being tolerant about his status. We've all been emotionally "stupid" at least once or twice in our lives. We've loved someone who did more harm than anything else to our souls. So you could relate emotional "stupidity" to lack of self-respect. Or for some reason women don't see MM as "criminals" enough. I think sleeping with a MM is like going bananas or getting drunk. You don't think of the consequences, you just live for today and want to feel good today. But tomorrow you deal with consequences you didn't count on.
newbby Posted February 28, 2006 Posted February 28, 2006 Hmm, control, excitement, forbidden fruit... Let's talk about emotional intelligence. If you fell in love with a man and found out that he murdered his parents or children, you'd probably be disgusted and immediately fall out of love with this man. So your brain DOES control your emotions. If you meet a gorgeous guy who seems like the right one, but after a couple dates he tells you that he had raped his sister, would you accept a date #3? I don't think so. So when you know that someone is married, you actually let yourself fall in love with him. You're being tolerant about his status. We've all been emotionally "stupid" at least once or twice in our lives. We've loved someone who did more harm than anything else to our souls. So you could relate emotional "stupidity" to lack of self-respect. Or for some reason women don't see MM as "criminals" enough. most ow, for awhile at least, see the mm as a victim of circumstance. trapped in a loveless marriage, and staying because of the children, it would harm his wife to leave, etc. I think sleeping with a MM is like going bananas or getting drunk. You don't think of the consequences, you just live for today and want to feel good today. But tomorrow you deal with consequences you didn't count on. yes, probably, that is part of it. desperate for happiness today, thinking that there could also be a tommorrow. overall though, of course there is nothing wise about falling for a mm or getting involved, and nobody is suggesting that there is. although it could also be argued that its a very brave thing to do. theres either something terribly wrong in that persons life, that they are seeking to alleviate through a relationship. or they have some lessons to learn. or they truly have stumbled upon true love with the right man for them, (it does happen).
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