MM gives ring for V day...not impressed.

[9Lives]

It must really suck living like this. Having to wait until 5 am to get a VD lay and a gift b/c your screwing a MM and that is the only convienant time he could come spend w/ you. I would hate to live like this.

 

And as for the diamond if you really cared and loved your MM you wouldn't care how small the diamond is. My last serious relationship (b4 I met H) I was dating a guy. He bought me a diamond ring and OMGOSH this thing was extremely small, and even the gold band was small. He paid $150 (he gave me the paper work on it). Did I bitch and complain how small the diamond was, even to myself? NO, b/c it was from him and that was all that mattered to me.

 

Sorry if that sounds harsh.

 

oh please! It is nothing wrong with not liking a gift from someone no matter who it is. He doesn't even know how I feel. It happens.

[9Lives]

I think what bothers you is the consolation-reward message of the small ring. The "big ring" is for the wife, a small one for you. An hour for you, a life for his wife. Routine love-making for you, Valentine celebration for her.

 

What bothers you also is that you're supposed to feel grateful for the ring (his love) and you actually feel that you're getting very little. He is trying to drag you into commitment with a stupid little ring. The ring says: you're mine now forever as a mistress, I got you a ring.

 

So your feeling of ungratitude is normal.

 

For your information, the wife did not get S/HIT. I know that from a close friend of hers. So kick rock smarty pants. Again, I am not in competition with her. I ask for what I want from him and the most of the time, he does it or gives it to me. I could get a bigger ring but that is not necessary.

[mopar crazy]

oh please! It is nothing wrong with not liking a gift from someone no matter who it is. He doesn't even know how I feel. It happens.

I never said there was nothing wrong w/ not liking the gift, that happens all the time. What are you going to do when he continues to ask you why you aren't wearing it? Do you plan on wearing it?

[9Lives]

We agree. The size of the ring is NOT the issue. It's the fact that she's accepting scraps in more important ways. As far as I'm concerned the ring is meaningless. The size of it though IS sort of symbolic of what she's getting from him where it truly counts.

 

My mm treats me good so talk to the hand. I dont get scraps. this man has done alot for me so I amnnot trying to hear it.

[9Lives]

We agree. The size of the ring is NOT the issue. It's the fact that she's accepting scraps in more important ways. As far as I'm concerned the ring is meaningless. The size of it though IS sort of symbolic of what she's getting from him where it truly counts.

 

The ring is not meaningless. It is a gift. It doesnt mean what YOU GUYS feel like it means. What it meant is he wanted me to have a ring for this particular holiday and some of you did not get NOTHING AT ALL.

 

It does not mean this is how he feels about me. You are over reacting.

[9Lives]

Let's all read this post again. She is not complaining that she is just getting scraps from him and she is not complaining about the inherent symbolism of the ring. She is complaining that the diamonds on the ring are too small. In response to this I think she is ungrateful.

 

why am I ungrateful? Explain that. I did not tell him I did not like it. So if he gave me a bone...I should have said...thank you so much.

[whichwayisup]

What so funny? He gave me 2500.00 to clean up my credit.....I really like that.

 

You can't figure that out on your own? Well, I won't burst your little bubble.

 

My mm treats me good so talk to the hand. I dont get scraps. this man has done alot for me so I amnnot trying to hear it.

 

Again, I won't burst your bubble.

 

Enjoy the ride while it lasts.

[9Lives]

You're reading it YOUR way, and I'm reading it my way. I don't think it's so black and white. I think deep down the size of the ring is NOT at issue with her. That's why I responded the way I did.

 

I guess some of us take things more literally than others when we read a post.

 

So what am I trying to say? If the diamonds was bigger....it would still be just a gift.....it is just a gift.

[9Lives]

She should be thinking what that ring REPRESENTS and the strings attached rather than the size. It means he HAS her. Another broken promise, filled with hope, but no happy ending...it's his way of making sure he can keep her and his wife to feed his ego and all his needs. Boy, what a generous MM!! Sheesh...

 

It dont mean he has me. It is a gift. GET REAL

[Art_Critic]

It dont mean he has me. It is a gift. GET REAL

 

I think that what is more important is that you don't have him..

 

The ring was a gift.. but it does come with strings..

[9Lives]

Uhmm, my comment wasn't supposed to be mushy. I'm meaning it in a more negative way rather than what SHE thinks it could mean, but obviously she's not seeing that side of it at all.

 

It is just a gift. He was showing love on V day.

[whichwayisup]

It dont mean he has me. It is a gift. GET REAL

 

Again, I won't burst your bubble. Believe whatever you whatever you want, it's YOUR life.

[9Lives]

I never said there was nothing wrong w/ not liking the gift, that happens all the time. What are you going to do when he continues to ask you why you aren't wearing it? Do you plan on wearing it?

 

Yes, I am going to wear it but not everyday like a wedding ring or anything. I will wear it when I want to put it on to match my outfit or something. It is just like the other rings in my jewelry box.

[whichwayisup]

It is just a gift. He was showing love on V day.

 

I have to say, if he loves you SO much, why then won't he get a divorce and leave his wife then be with "just" you? You're settling to be number 2. Don't you feel you deserve to be number ONE in a man's heart and life?

 

A_C is right...He has you, but you really don't have him.

 

I bet your MM has his own idea of what that ring represents. Not to you, but to him. Just like the money he 'gave' you...

[9Lives]

You can't figure that out on your own? Well, I won't burst your little bubble.

 

 

 

Again, I won't burst your bubble.

 

Enjoy the ride while it lasts.

 

 

Thank you for your permission and the ride has been very nice and sweet.

I know my man treats me well.

[9Lives]

I think that what is more important is that you don't have him..

 

The ring was a gift.. but it does come with strings..

 

Why is it more important that I dont have him. Does his wife have him...really? Yeah she got a certificate but does she REALLY have him.

 

No strings because I have brought him things too so......

[9Lives]

Again, I won't burst your bubble. Believe whatever you whatever you want, it's YOUR life.

 

That is right and I love him very much. He has been good to me and my children. Done more for me than any man I have met. I have had alot of positive happen. You cant touch this. He makes me happy i would say

85% of the time.

[9Lives]

I have to say, if he loves you SO much, why then won't he get a divorce and leave his wife then be with "just" you? You're settling to be number 2. Don't you feel you deserve to be number ONE in a man's heart and life?

 

A_C is right...He has you, but you really don't have him.

 

I bet your MM has his own idea of what that ring represents. Not to you, but to him. Just like the money he 'gave' you...

 

Well he cant control me no more than I can control him. Let the good times keep rolling. I aint complaining.

[whichwayisup]

Thank you for your permission and the ride has been very nice and sweet.

I know my man treats me well.

 

Nice and sweet until his wife finds out and your affair comes to a crashing end...Guess you haven't read many posts in this section.

Yeah she got a certificate but does she REALLY have him.

 

Are you friends with HIS friends? Family, his parents? DO you spend holidays, Christmas, birthday's and vacations with him? Go to outings and parties? Neighbourhood BBQ's and other functions? Does he come to you when he's sick? Does he confide his soul and everything in his head to you?

 

You don't want to see the fact you're not number one. He is your number one though. Yet, he has another FULL life without you. A wife, a house, a history, a marriage with someone else.

 

If you want to live your life like this and you're happy, good for you. I guess I just don't understand why you would settle for this crap.

[Art_Critic]

I aint complaining.

 

Here is your original post.. the Bold areas make it sound to me like you are complaining..

MM gives ring for V day...not impressed.

 

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

My mm came over on Valentines day at 5am for a hour. We did our lovemaking routine and then he gave me a little diamond ring. I acted like I really liked it but it was not all that to me. It was small and I really did not like it. He asked me a couple of days ago why I did not have it on....I said I need to get it sized. I know the ring was not a commitment ring or anything but I guess I should have been more grateful. I DONT LIKE LITTLE DIAMONDS. ......I know I am a mess

[whichwayisup]

He makes me happy i would say

85% of the time.

 

See, that is my whole point. Your MM makes you happy 85% of the time. His wife gets the full 100%.

 

Don't you think you deserve more? From a guy who will love 'just' you and noone else? Why share? Yeah yeah yeah, you love him...

 

One day not only are you going to be hurt, but your kids too. If he is part of their lives too, your MM is living a bigger lie than just having an affair with you. He's living TWO complete separate lives.

[9Lives]

Nice and sweet until his wife finds out and your affair comes to a crashing end...Guess you haven't read many posts in this section.

 

 

Are you friends with HIS friends? Family, his parents? DO you spend holidays, Christmas, birthday's and vacations with him? Go to outings and parties? Neighbourhood BBQ's and other functions? Does he come to you when he's sick? Does he confide his soul and everything in his head to you?

 

You don't want to see the fact you're not number one. He is your number one though. Yet, he has another FULL life without you. A wife, a house, a history, a marriage with someone else.

 

If you want to live your life like this and you're happy, good for you. I guess I just don't understand why you would settle for this crap.

 

Yes I have met his MOTHER AND FATHER...in fact we went out of town together for the weekend to see his little brother play basketball.

 

His best friend came and picked me up to go out of town for my birthday AS A SURPISE to me. We all went out of town for the weekend. His best friend and girlfriend was like I heard so much about you.

 

When his friends from California flew in, he brought them over to my house to me.

 

He brings his kids over to hang out and play. They like being with me.

 

Christmas and Thanksgiving,,,my man was there. He brought me and the kids gifts and came over.

 

Thanksgiving he came over and hung out with me and my family for a while.

 

When he is sick...he stays in the bed so that is that but he calls me and tells me how he is doing.

 

What else do you want to know?

[9Lives]

Here is your original post.. the Bold areas make it sound to me like you are complaining..

 

 

I did not complain about the ring. I said I did not like it. he does not know.

[9Lives]

See, that is my whole point. Your MM makes you happy 85% of the time. His wife gets the full 100%.

 

.

 

She is not getting full 100%. I know she is not.

[My_Other_I]

Wow, one rant about a ring and look where it's got you!

There is a saying, it's something about not looking at given horse's teeth.

 

Just my opinion - people who truly believe in what they say don't feel the need to defend themselves.