blah1234 Posted February 23, 2006 Posted February 23, 2006 So, I and my ex girlfriend (we dated for two years) have been broken up for about a month and a half (she broke up with me). We started hanging out with eachother on a regular basis only a couple weeks after the breakup. And well, a few weeks ago we started this friends with benefits type thing. I have no idea where we stand. Sometimes she acts like we are still dating (tells me she loves me, wants to snuggle, tells me that she might eventually want to get back together)... Other times she talks about how the friends with benifits thing is going to end eventually and she wants me to be ok with that, and tells me about cute guys she meets and **** like that. I think she is as confused about everything as I am. The really messed up thing is that she tells me that she wants to have sex with me even though we are both still virgins. I always say no because she used to have this strict "no sex before marraige policy" when we were dating and I don't want to do it and then have her regret it. I also know that sex would just **** things even more up. Any advice?
OPTIPESSIMISTIC Posted February 23, 2006 Posted February 23, 2006 Honey, I am sorry to say it, but I think you are being used. I am a firm believer that once broken up, you can never be just f buddies. There will always be some emotional attachment because there was one before. And as for her being all hot and then cold, well it sounds to me like she is just having her cake and eating it too. Be strong and cut it off!
salmagundi Posted February 23, 2006 Posted February 23, 2006 Ok, let me get this straight. You guys broke up but now you're f**kbuddies, but you dont have sex. Hmmm... F*ck it. Leave. You're obviously young, she's not the one. You're gonna find someone new. This scenario of yours is going nowhere and you are only gonna get your head done in if you stick around. She is, deliberately or not, toying with you and you are not even getting laid in the deal. So that means that you are sticking around hoping she will take you back and in a few years you will get married and then, finally, have sex with her. Stop the insanity, just bail. It beats playing fool for love for an emotionally immature primadonna who doesnt know what she wants. in my opinion, anyway, salmagundi
UT_longhorn Posted February 24, 2006 Posted February 24, 2006 agree with bost previous posters. shes using you as a springboard to move on to the next guy. shes not ready to face the big waves alone yet..so shes using you as an emotional floatation device until the next boat comes to pick her up. and where are you left? in the high tides by yourself....feeling like a chump. can't believe your sweet one that used to love you so much could think so deviously? shes probably doesn't even know that its causing you so much grief. you need to tell her how much it hurts and tell her to leave you be.
Author blah1234 Posted February 24, 2006 Author Posted February 24, 2006 It doesn't hurt. It's just confusing. I'm not really sure where we stand because right now it feels like we are a couple... it's almost like we have an open relationship, but neither of us uses the "open" part.
UT_longhorn Posted February 24, 2006 Posted February 24, 2006 how are you gonna feel if she does? prolly not so swell.
Author blah1234 Posted February 24, 2006 Author Posted February 24, 2006 No, but maybe this way I can either realize that I don't want to be with her or work things out with her. Even if we weren't doing anything and I found out that she found another guy, I'd feel like crap. So, how will this hurt any worse?
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