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Can a relationship be doomed from the start?


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Posted

I've been dating this guy for two months now, and he is an incredible person. He always treats me great and I feel loved and appreciated whenever we're together. But the problem is that we seem doomed. Everytime we try to make plans, something happens that prevents one of us from making it. And these events are things that I can't really hold against him- like his friend getting killed. Is there such a thing as bad luck? Are two people just not meant to be together, even when they care about each other very deeply? How long should I stick it out before my efforts become futile? Help!

Posted

Is your glass half empty?

 

If you look at the relationship as 'doomed' because there are struggles to overcome, then yeah, it's not going to work out. If, on the other hand, you look at it as surviving these things, and being supportive through it all, and making it out of it toghether, it could create a much stronger bond.

Posted

The best relationships I've had are the ones that started out with the most obsticles to overcome. It really seemed to prove that each of us wanted to be there, and were willing to work for it. There was a trust built from the very beginning, that we knew we could count on each other in hard times.

 

Relationships that started off easily seemed to fall apart at the earliest signs of trouble.

Posted

Your relationship doesn't appear to be doomed from what you have written. However, if something always comes up to prevent you from being together, you might want to consider sharing those things instead of allowing them to sperate you.

 

For instance, his friend got killed. You could still be there to support him, emotionally. I don't know what the other reasons are, but just try to adapt to the obstacles.

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