hurtbeyondwords Posted February 6, 2006 Share Posted February 6, 2006 First off I want to thank everyone for sharing their bests as well as hardships with everyone. Ive been reading all the posts and feel better, no longer alone. My girlfriend of 2 years recently broke up with me just after New Years. This has been the hardest thing Ive ever had to deal with. Ive been in a few serious relationships but have never felt this bad before. Ok, here is my story. I noticed about a week before the breakup that she was growing distant. Before that everything was good. We would fight and bicker but nothing that wasnt worked out. At christmas I had given her a promise ring and I had never seen her happier. My mom even commented that she's never seen anyone look at me like that before. She recently purchased her very first house and moves in very soon. She told me initially that she just needs space, that she wasnt happy and didnt know why. she said to me that she wanted me to be myself and if I needed to show affection or tell her anything to not hesitate. we have seen eachother still once a weekend and we seemed to even be getting better. She seemed happier and said that we love eachother, she kissed me on 2 different occasions. to sum up how I feel now... Last night I went to her house and I mentioned how it seemed that she was scared, with the ring, new house... she responded by saying that she had afraid to tell me before that she loves my but is no longer "in love", that shes known for a while... I take that as BS! noone can turn off love. why would she say all those things before then? why kiss me? why still talk to me? To me I think she is confused and does not know how else to explain it. I dont know.. I have never loved someone like this... pls offer your advice sorry for the long post:) Link to post Share on other sites
Author hurtbeyondwords Posted February 6, 2006 Author Share Posted February 6, 2006 Im gonna try NC but with only a month in do I take any chance that may arise to get back together. I know NC can help people but when do we give it another chance? surely someone has done so with success. anyone? Link to post Share on other sites
Lonely and confused Posted February 7, 2006 Share Posted February 7, 2006 Take it from me. I dont know if you know my story to well. But it truelly seems like you are implementing no contact as a way to get back your ex girlfriend. This is 100% WRONG. You used the word "WE" when you say when do we give it another chance? My ex, who was more like my best friend to be honest, dumped me out of the blue like you a week after my birthday and completely changed, and cut me out of her life. This was someone who was my friend for over 8 years also. I didnt do NC to get her back. I did NC not even so I could get over her. I did NC so I could stop hurting myself with hope. Its not that hope is a terrible thing, but it will hold you back from finding happiness in other areas of your life. You have only been broken up for about a month, and that is probably the MOST vulnerable stage. You really cant look at NC as a way to get over someone. I think it should be seen as a way to put life in perspective, but not a tool to get over them. People tend to think that the first days after the breakup are the worst. I think they arent because there is that idea that you still may get together, but when that first month goes by you truelly start to get the full effect of what has happened. Don't sit around waiting for her, if she contacts you explain to her that in order for you to move on, it is best that we dont contact each other anymore. Dont let her know how hurt you are, how sad you are. It doesnt do anything, it really doesnt. Want to know my success story? My ex who i thought ild never get over, and would never come back. Has. Only now I live 500 miles away. But i have grown up so much, to be honest im glad im not with her, not because of who she is, but because how suffocating relationships can be when they are handeled immaturely. Link to post Share on other sites
Author hurtbeyondwords Posted February 7, 2006 Author Share Posted February 7, 2006 thank you for your reponse. I have realized now that no matter what happens, right now I have to take this as the end of the relationship. I know how damaging hope can be. If she wants another chance she knows how to reach me. Im moving on though for my sake and bettering myself. Link to post Share on other sites
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