Guest-Rachel Posted February 6, 2006 Posted February 6, 2006 What is wrong with me? Hi. My name is Rachel and I am 17 years old. I believe there's something wrong with me but I have no clue as to what it is. I attend a public school where they have a system of "if you're late you have to make up the time". Well, I miss school a lot... but not in the usual teenager way. I always ask or tell my mother that I'm going to skip. She usually agrees, but lately I've been getting out of hand. Every morning when I wake up I walk directly to the bathroom to take a shower. I think of random things, most of them not relating to skipping school. Once I get out and go to my room, I sit down on my computer to play music while I get dressed. It usually goes one of these two in the morning: 1) I get 100% completely ready for school, but by the time my mother asks me to go to the car I have already decided that I do not want to go. 2) I put on my robe and tell my mother that I'm going to be staying home. I do not know which one is more regular than the other, but it always concludes the same way and I always feel like I have acomplished nothing. Some days I feel like I have something to do and I find something to do; other days I click around aimlessly on the computer. I've thought of some things that may factor in to what is wrong with me. They include - I do not have many friends at school; the majority are aquaintances. The only person I enjoy being around is my boyfriend, who I have no classes with and can only see in between class. - My teachers are fun to talk with, but their teaching styles are boring and consistent. - I feel like school takes up too much time (I stay there for about 7 1/2 hours). - Since I missed so many days last semester, I have to do "time-for-time" every day after school. It lasts an 1 1/2. - Even though I enjoy wearing certain clothes that I have bought, I usually end up feeling like I'm dirty, greasy, or itchy. - I have acne on my face and chest. I cover up my chest all the time and my face is usually hidden behind my hair. - I feel very happy in generally, but I could almost care less about how well I accomplish things in and out of school. - When I have doctor or dentist appointments, I try to convince my mother to let me stay home so I won't have to go. - I don't go out a lot, but when I do it's usually only with my boyfriend. - One of the thing I enjoy most about life is playing World of Warcraft (PC game - MMORPG), watching movies or LOST on my computer, or going out somewhere with my boyfriend. - When I start things I usually never finish them. Sometimes I finish them but it takes me weeks to months. - I have a hard time remembering things I learn in school. I also have a hard time concentrating sometimes. If anyone could help me have any idea of what could be wrong with me I would be very happy. I have figured it could be depression, but I am starting to think it is something else that I have no knowledge of.
Outcast Posted February 7, 2006 Posted February 7, 2006 You might want to talk to your school counsellor about this. If you catch it early, it will be much more fixable. It sounds like you could be depressed but it could also be one or more of the common personality disorders. Go see your counsellor ASAP and ask for a diagnosis. She should refer you to a psychologist. You can't live this way - you need to go to school, to work, and to live independently one day so you need to be worried about this and to get it fixed.
hurtbeyondwords Posted February 7, 2006 Posted February 7, 2006 I agree with outcast. It never hurts to ask for help, thats why we are all here. I feel the same way sometimes. Ive been dealing with depression my whole life and I know how low you can feel. For the first time in my life Im getting help. There is nothing wrong with getting help in life it's how you respond to it that matters. Look up and know you're not alone.
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