starr3546 Posted February 6, 2006 Posted February 6, 2006 ok guys!! my x has been calling me lately, he started talking to me about a week ago again...we went out for coffee, he kept calling it a date, kept telling me he needs to keep that there aren't any amazing girls out there, and when you find one amazing you need to keep um close...all this crap...he im's me on the computer almost everyday and we talk....he makes comments, like i used to love to do this with you..blah blah blah...then today we are talking and he started....asking me about myspace.com...and if i have everr dated someone from there...i told him no i don't know how i feel about online dating...and asked him if he ever would you, and he is like...well i have been thinking about it, which y i asked you to get some feed back...i am like WHAT THE #$%^ so anyway i was like...look u know how i feel about you still...i am still in love with u i don't wanna talk about this...i don't wanna hear about you with other girls...i wanna be left in the dark then he goes i thought you were ok with us talking again, i said i am but it hurts to hear that you wanna be with otherr people, and he is like i never said that...i am thinking what you just said that!!! what should i do, i love him, and i don't get what he is doing...where are his intentions, come on now...he knows we just can't be friends....especially since he knows i still love him....what should i do...and what do you think he is thinking i feel like i am being put on the back burner here!!!
Kengne Posted February 7, 2006 Posted February 7, 2006 ok guys!! my x has been calling me lately, he started talking to me about a week ago again...we went out for coffee, he kept calling it a date, kept telling me he needs to keep that there aren't any amazing girls out there, and when you find one amazing you need to keep um close...all this crap...he im's me on the computer almost everyday and we talk....he makes comments, like i used to love to do this with you..blah blah blah...then today we are talking and he started....asking me about myspace.com...and if i have everr dated someone from there...i told him no i don't know how i feel about online dating...and asked him if he ever would you, and he is like...well i have been thinking about it, which y i asked you to get some feed back...i am like WHAT THE #$%^ so anyway i was like...look u know how i feel about you still...i am still in love with u i don't wanna talk about this...i don't wanna hear about you with other girls...i wanna be left in the dark then he goes i thought you were ok with us talking again, i said i am but it hurts to hear that you wanna be with otherr people, and he is like i never said that...i am thinking what you just said that!!! what should i do, i love him, and i don't get what he is doing...where are his intentions, come on now...he knows we just can't be friends....especially since he knows i still love him....what should i do...and what do you think he is thinking i feel like i am being put on the back burner here!!! You are giving him too much. Of your time. And more importantly... of your emotions. He had the nerve to ask you what you tht abt dating online, after you poured out your guts to him a mth ago abt how crazy in love you are with him? He's REALLY trying to bring this 'let's be friends' talk to you? *shakes head* He's still confused. He wants to have his cake... "let's be friends"... and eat it too while still keeping you there on the sidelines "I can't find any amazing girls out there...I loved doing this with you...". I don't think he's doing it intentionally... but he's clearly confused and feeling lonely and falling back on you. And you're giving him even more power by showing him that you STILL.. STILL are in love with him, and can't 'just be friends'. He knows he has you - HE KNOWS! UGH. Starr... I think you're gonna have to let him go for a while, and go back into NC. This is not a good situation for you. If you cannot stand to hear his possibly dating adventures, and you are STILL in love with him, and you KNOW you cannot 'just be friends' ... THEN WHY THE HELL ARE YOU CONTINUING TO TALK TO HIM? Is he telling you anything? REALLY? WHAT is he saying? Not. A. Damn. Thing. He isn't saying "Let's start over from scratch" or "I want us to work things out". No one is talking about you guys jumping back into the relationship right away or anything like that. But a step forward in the right direction, feel me? For WHATEVER reason *it really doesn't matter* he's just not making, or not ready to make those steps... RIGHT NOW. So for your sanity and peace of mind I think you need to walk away from the situation - RIGHT NOW. Yes - I understand you love him. BUT you have to love yourself more, because no one else will do that (except God IMO). Love is not the end all be all. And sometimes love, though wonderful, will make us put up with shyt that we normally would not tolerate. Please do not put up with his current wishy-washyness. You must be a patient person. Because I - with my absolute lack of patience for ANYTHING - really CANNOT stand feeling frustrated or negative or crazy like how you feel now. I can't do it! I'd have to walk away. Now... no one is saying you guys will NEVER get back together... but I think RIGHT now being in contact with him is doing you more harm than good. And it's painful for me to watch, because it reminded me of my situation w my ex R *remember my posts?*. It's taken a good few weeks for me to get my shyt together and my headspace to a point where moving forward - I will ALWAYS do what is RIGHT FOR ME - EVEN if it hurts me in the process. Hopefully.. you will follow suit and do what's right for you. Because I think you know too... that what he is saying is messing you up... and you don't need that. K.
Author starr3546 Posted February 7, 2006 Author Posted February 7, 2006 your a doll!! i just needed someone to tell me exactly what you did!! i am going to break contact tonight...
Recommended Posts