Timbero Posted February 5, 2006 Posted February 5, 2006 Hey whats up guys. Ill give you a basic run down about this girl. I met her in school a few years ago. We would always say hello to each other. This summer we got to know this girl pretty well. And we hit it off perfectly. But it turns out she has a boy friend. The boy friend is a 36 year old junkie. she is 20. I dont this guy is right for her. I think i have fallen for her, and i think it would work great if i had her. I know she likes me she is constatly flirting and making passes when her boy friend is not arround. I have been trying to talk to her but her boy friend is always arround so i really cant. I have been thinking of letting them be. But i really like this girl and i think she is the one for me. I have no clue what to do. I have Never been in a situation like this. Any advice on what should i do. Pleas help!!
BigB Posted February 5, 2006 Posted February 5, 2006 How do you make a Girl Dump her boy friend for you? Simple answer, you don't. You can't make her do anything. She may choose to leave him, she may not... it's up to her, and there really isn't anything you can do except get hurt. I've tried this in the past and learned my lesson the hard way.... My suggestion, walk away.
hyakku Posted February 5, 2006 Posted February 5, 2006 Hey don't suggest breaking them up or forcibly try. Instead keep being ****in awesome, providing her with tons and tons of fun. When she realizes she is enjoying herself with you more than him, she'll say, "Screw this guy I'm not enjoying myself". And you won't be the cause of the end of a relationship. Instead you will be the provider of fun and you win, she wins, and the junkie wins (He has more time to do his own drugs, come on what junkie wouldn't want that).
Fester Lungblood Posted February 5, 2006 Posted February 5, 2006 I don't know how your story with this girl will unfold but I do know how it will end: with you getting punched out by the 36 year old junkie.
monkey00 Posted February 5, 2006 Posted February 5, 2006 i've been in a similar situation myself. im not sure the exact situation/relationship she's in with the other guy or if he's an actual bf. But we both talked about it and brought it out to the open. We agreed to continue seeing each other but no strings attached. and im equally opening myself to other opportunities as well. my advice to you is to not get involved too much with her. as others have said, you cant force someone to do something she doesnt want to (you think that hasnt crossed my mind?). knowing the facts that she has a bf, hasnt dumped him yet, it means she's not willing to jump into a relationship with you (yet). i suggest 2 options for you. avoid all contact altogether. OR keep seeing her and see other women at the same time. if she gets jealous/angry on you, you can use the 'u got a bf' line on her, so she has no right to get angry. The tricky situation about this is to avoid putting your heart on the line with only this one girl. if you do it'll get stepped on.
DWJK Posted February 5, 2006 Posted February 5, 2006 Hey whats up guys. Ill give you a basic run down about this girl. I met her in school a few years ago. We would always say hello to each other. This summer we got to know this girl pretty well. And we hit it off perfectly. But it turns out she has a boy friend. The boy friend is a 36 year old junkie. she is 20. I dont this guy is right for her. I think i have fallen for her, and i think it would work great if i had her. I know she likes me she is constatly flirting and making passes when her boy friend is not arround. I have been trying to talk to her but her boy friend is always arround so i really cant. I have been thinking of letting them be. But i really like this girl and i think she is the one for me. I think its foolish to devote your time and energy into (of all the billions of women in the world) getting a women whos dating a 36year junkie. But if I were you, I'd date other women (a preferably let her know about it), and make plans to see eachother. Lunch, coffee, whatever You need to give her a reason for her to leave the other guy. So acting needy/desperate etc.. is like shooting yourself in the foot.
whichwayisup Posted February 5, 2006 Posted February 5, 2006 You tell her point blank, "I like you alot and at some point in the future if you and your boyfriend break up, I'd love to start dating you when you're ready to date again." and leave it at that. The last thing you need to do is get involved with her while she is with someone else, let alone a 36 year old junkie. I also hate to say this, but don't you have to kinda question the type of person she is??? Having a boyfriend as a junkie? Or does she use as well? Say what you need to say to her, feelings wise and then back off. See other people...IF she has feelings for you, eventually she'lll find her way to you. I think though, if you're "waiting" for her, she won't come to you. 1)the boyfriend thing, 2) She could just turn to you at certain times and you could be something on the side for her, which you don't want to be 2nd best!
Becoming Posted February 5, 2006 Posted February 5, 2006 Simple answer, you don't. You can't make her do anything. The sooner you learn BigB's simple answer the better you'll be at all relationships. (like the avatar BigB:) )
jerbear Posted February 5, 2006 Posted February 5, 2006 Can't really force a girl to like you. I did do what hyakku suggested and it didn't work then. Funny thing... out of the blue she called the other day saying she is now divorced with two kids after all these years. I think it does work but people change and life goes on. I told her I have no interests in her.
Author Timbero Posted February 5, 2006 Author Posted February 5, 2006 You tell her point blank, "I like you alot and at some point in the future if you and your boyfriend break up, I'd love to start dating you when you're ready to date again." and leave it at that. The last thing you need to do is get involved with her while she is with someone else, let alone a 36 year old junkie. I also hate to say this, but don't you have to kinda question the type of person she is??? Having a boyfriend as a junkie? Or does she use as well? Say what you need to say to her, feelings wise and then back off. See other people...IF she has feelings for you, eventually she'lll find her way to you. I think though, if you're "waiting" for her, she won't come to you. 1)the boyfriend thing, 2) She could just turn to you at certain times and you could be something on the side for her, which you don't want to be 2nd best! Hey guys i left a few things out. . She is a really cool girl. She is not a junkie.the only reason she like this guy is because. She fell in love with this friend of mine, and my friend had no feelings for her. So she got totally depressed. So in walked the junkie. The junkie got her on the rebound. Hes a nice guy. He is trying to be my friend. I have no clue what to do... I was thinking about ignoring her completly and every now and then give her a compliment. Her boy friend is 100% possivie follows her every where. So its kind of hard to talk to her..
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