resentment006 Posted February 4, 2006 Posted February 4, 2006 I really think that being a doormat for me is the best chance of keeping a girlfriend. Just go along with whatever she decides. Unfortunately alot of women today make sex a reward so the guy has to become a doormat in order to get laid. All a woman has to do to get a man to do what she wants is use sex as a weapon against him. It will work 95% of the time. Afterall a doormat man is a doormat for a reason. He remains a doormat as long as he gets some desirable reward from it. If he's not getting any reward/benefit from being a doormat he will start sticking up for himself. Maybe I am a self destructive individual but I wouldn't be this way if I wasn't getting the rewards I want from it. I think it takes more courage for a man to be a doormat than to stand up for his rights. 1
Cassiodorus Posted February 4, 2006 Posted February 4, 2006 Ferris Bueller said it better then I ever could: "Cameron has never been in love. At least, nobody's ever been in love with him. If things don't change for him, he's gonna marry the first girl he lays, and she's gonna treat him like ****, because she will have given him what he has built up in his mind as the end-all, be-all of human existence. She won't respect him, 'cause you can't respect somebody who kisses your ass. It just doesn't work."
noclobber Posted February 5, 2006 Posted February 5, 2006 I really think that being a doormat for me is the best chance of keeping a girlfriend. If you can keep a girlfriend only by being a doormat then you are probably not worth having a girlfriend in the first place. Sorry if i sound rude but your post is really pathetic!
neek Posted February 5, 2006 Posted February 5, 2006 Why would anyone WANT to be a doormat? Don't you think you have more to offer than submission? And are you really that obsessed with sex (well, who doesn't like it?) that you'd surrender to every demand of hers and not try to take control of your own life? You CAN be in a relationship with someone who lets you be who you are and still will want you in the bedroom. You should look for that instead of someone who will wipe their feet all over you.
I Luv the Chariot OH Posted February 5, 2006 Posted February 5, 2006 If you can keep a girlfriend only by being a doormat then you are probably not worth having a girlfriend in the first place. Sorry if i sound rude but your post is really pathetic! Pretty much. I think you're dating the wrong type of girls.
DWJK Posted February 5, 2006 Posted February 5, 2006 I really think that being a doormat for me is the best chance of keeping a girlfriend. Just go along with whatever she decides. Unfortunately alot of women today make sex a reward so the guy has to become a doormat in order to get laid. All a woman has to do to get a man to do what she wants is use sex as a weapon against him. It will work 95% of the time. Afterall a doormat man is a doormat for a reason. He remains a doormat as long as he gets some desirable reward from it. If he's not getting any reward/benefit from being a doormat he will start sticking up for himself. Maybe I am a self destructive individual but I wouldn't be this way if I wasn't getting the rewards I want from it. Women want confident, independent, emotionally stable, MEN who dont NEED to have sex/approval/attention to be happy, who dont idealize every attractive woman they meet, who are dominant, who are leaders, who dont look as sex as something you "get" from women (rather, an experience YOU can give them), who arent afraid to move foward or take risks, who people RESPECT. You are a horny boy (with a very low amout of self-worth) who will sacrafice what little self-respect you have to get sex. There's your problem. Dont take offense, because (based on what you typed) it sounds very close to the truth I think it takes more courage for a man to be a doormat than to stand up for his rights. ...
Groovy Posted February 6, 2006 Posted February 6, 2006 Some posters are a little harsh, maybe truthful. The guy I am seeing said yesterday I have all these "maybes, these rules and boundaries". It pissed me off a bit but if he is looking for the submissive "yes dear" to everything girl than I am the wrong one for him, simple as that. I told him this is me, people either have to like you for who you are or not. If you get a girl by bending to all these "yes maam's", I think you will be even more miserable. There's compromise and than a lack of being who you are and getting what you want.
hyakku Posted February 6, 2006 Posted February 6, 2006 This wins the most pathetic thread on the internet, congratulations. There's no need to post help here. Just look up david DeAngelo, get his mastery series, listen to the WOMEN especially in that program. The women know what they are talking about if you don't wanna believe another man.
Curmudgeon Posted February 6, 2006 Posted February 6, 2006 Any woman worth being with wants a man ~~ not some chest-beating, knuckle-dragging throwback ~~ a man who is confident but compassionate, strong yet tender, stalwart yet not afraid of his own emotions. I can think of only one synonym for a doormat -- WUSS! Trading doomat status for sex is akin to prostitution.
mrB2006 Posted February 6, 2006 Posted February 6, 2006 Resentment: OK...I don't want to be too rough. I certainly don't want to dogpile you. But here goes.... Sheesh....You would rather be a doormat? Are you kidding me? I guarantee you that your 'girlfriend' will be 'outta there' soon....sorry to say. To everyone: you have read my pathetic posts a while back....I wasn't this bad....please, tell me I wasn't this pathetic LOL....At least I had a modicum of self-resepect.....I was just an inexperienced Lad with a sensitive heart. This guy, WHOA....... Well, resentment, whatever floats your boat.....I still wish you the best of luck...cause you are going to need it..... MrB
jen_jen_heartbroken Posted February 6, 2006 Posted February 6, 2006 Successful romantic relationships come in one mold: Two inter-dependent (not co-dependent) people who respect each other and hold each other's hearts tenderly with care. All other versions tend to fail in one way or another. Either they split up, or one or both partners feel unhappy and unsatisfied in the relationship.
Neptune Posted February 6, 2006 Posted February 6, 2006 The only thing that should be honored to be called a doormat is a flounder:D
CaliGuy Posted February 6, 2006 Posted February 6, 2006 Ferris Bueller said it better then I ever could: "Cameron has never been in love. At least, nobody's ever been in love with him. If things don't change for him, he's gonna marry the first girl he lays, and she's gonna treat him like ****, because she will have given him what he has built up in his mind as the end-all, be-all of human existence. She won't respect him, 'cause you can't respect somebody who kisses your ass. It just doesn't work." Truer words were never spoken. That Ferris was a genius!
amerikajin Posted February 6, 2006 Posted February 6, 2006 I think it takes more courage for a man to be a doormat than to stand up for his rights. Any coward can comply...it takes balls to stand up for yourself and to confront your own insecurities and to figure out who you really are and what you really want out of this life. Real courage is to confront those demons and conquer them so that you don't allow other people to invalidate you. That's courage. My guess is, you don't know what you want from a relationship (aside from sex, of course). You are looking at other women as a way of compensating for holes in your ego and they see through that. If a woman is merciful, she'll just see it, identify it and reject you before becoming entangled in a relationship. If she's got her own issues, she'll probably see it, identify it and use it as leverage in any type of relationship that results afterward. You can avoid all of this by figuring out what kind of woman best fits you, go with the feeling and just pick women based on that criteria. 1
Author resentment006 Posted February 7, 2006 Author Posted February 7, 2006 Women want confident, independent, emotionally stable, MEN who dont NEED to have sex/approval/attention to be happy, who dont idealize every attractive woman they meet, who are dominant, who are leaders, who dont look as sex as something you "get" from women (rather, an experience YOU can give them), who arent afraid to move foward or take risks, who people RESPECT. You are a horny boy (with a very low amout of self-worth) who will sacrafice what little self-respect you have to get sex. There's your problem. Dont take offense, because (based on what you typed) it sounds very close to the truth ... That is unless she's a feminist. Feminist women are power hungry and love doormat men.
amerikajin Posted February 8, 2006 Posted February 8, 2006 Why would you date a feminist? Why not date a woman with a healthy dose of self-respect, and in return someone who can respect you too? But man, no woman's going to respect a guy who goes into a relationships with a grudge. I know you're hurtin' man...we've all been there. I keep screwing up with women right and left, but hey, I take responsibility for it. The problem here is that you're putting all the blame on the other party, and that's just not going to work. People can see right through that.
Yamaha Posted February 8, 2006 Posted February 8, 2006 Doormat men tend to have low self-esteem and are too nice because they think it's the only way to hold on to a relationship. But no one wants to date a guy they can walk all over. Actually, some women do -- but this type of woman will remove your testicles and wear them as charms on her bracelet. Unless you enjoy constant harping, avoid this type of woman. The other type of doormat guy is the bastard. This is the passive aggressive prick who thinly veils his hostility with false niceness. His specialty is emotional blackmail. Do you tell women that whatever they want to do is fine with you and then pout and complain about what they choose? Do you argue all the time because you are constantly doing nice things without being asked and yet you feel that you do not get the recognition you deserve? Do you consider guilt tripping another person a recreational activity? You're not really being nice out of the kindness of your heart -- you're doing it to manipulate the other person and most people will see through you. Guys who are too nice do not get dumped for bad boys, they get dumped for guys who have backbone. Guys who realize this don't have to be a doormat to get someone to spend time with them. If you you fall into this category, try counseling to deal with your self-esteem and hostility issues. 1
I Luv the Chariot OH Posted February 8, 2006 Posted February 8, 2006 amerikajin: I believe feminists are the ones with TOO much self respect, if you know what I mean.
noclobber Posted February 8, 2006 Posted February 8, 2006 What is wrong in dating a feminist? I have gone out with a woman who is a feminist and I didn't find anything wrong with her. I did observe certain traits like aggressiveness, extra dose of self-respect, wanting to do everything that a man does (like motor-cycle riding) etc.. and I don't think there is anything wrong in it. May be dating a radical feminist might be a bad idea...
noclobber Posted February 8, 2006 Posted February 8, 2006 amerikajin: I believe feminists are the ones with TOO much self respect, if you know what I mean. hi chariot right on!
SmoochieFace Posted February 8, 2006 Posted February 8, 2006 What is wrong in dating a feminist? It's wrong if she uses her *feminism* as a cloak for contempt of men (putting them down, thinking she's *better* than them, etc.). No self-respecting guy would want to be with a woman like that. Been there once and will never go back.
alphamale Posted February 8, 2006 Posted February 8, 2006 I really think that being a doormat for me is the best chance of keeping a girlfriend. Just go along with whatever she decides. no sweat man...why not just castrate yourself while you're at it... Unfortunately alot of women today make sex a reward so the guy has to become a doormat in order to get laid. i don't think thats true at all. there are hundreds of factors at work here. All a woman has to do to get a man to do what she wants is use sex as a weapon against him. It will work 95% of the time. maybe....but remember that the man can get sex elsewhere....thats a big weapon also. Afterall a doormat man is a doormat for a reason. He remains a doormat as long as he gets some desirable reward from it. If he's not getting any reward/benefit from being a doormat he will start sticking up for himself. door mats get walked on, rained on, snowed on and generally have no shelter whatsoever. they are open to the elements, so to speak. Maybe I am a self destructive individual thats the understatement of the year! I think it takes more courage for a man to be a doormat than to stand up for his rights. so you think african-americans would be more couragous if they did not ask for their rights and equal treatement?
noclobber Posted February 8, 2006 Posted February 8, 2006 It's wrong if she uses her *feminism* as a cloak for contempt of men (putting them down, thinking she's *better* than them, etc.). No self-respecting guy would want to be with a woman like that. Been there once and will never go back. I agree with you. I wouldn't put up with that behavior either. And I think there is a general misconception that feminists hate men. But I guess its just that, a misconception. May be radical feminists that choose to be lesbians fall under that category.
Becoming Posted February 8, 2006 Posted February 8, 2006 Feminist who likes men here responding to OP: eeeeewwww. :sick: I like men who are real people, not the ones Yamaha so aptly describes: Doormat men tend to have low self-esteem and are too nice because they think it's the only way to hold on to a relationship. But no one wants to date a guy they can walk all over. Actually, some women do -- but this type of woman will remove your testicles and wear them as charms on her bracelet. Unless you enjoy constant harping, avoid this type of woman. The other type of doormat guy is the bastard. This is the passive aggressive prick who thinly veils his hostility with false niceness. His specialty is emotional blackmail. Do you tell women that whatever they want to do is fine with you and then pout and complain about what they choose? Do you argue all the time because you are constantly doing nice things without being asked and yet you feel that you do not get the recognition you deserve? Do you consider guilt tripping another person a recreational activity? You're not really being nice out of the kindness of your heart -- you're doing it to manipulate the other person and most people will see through you. Guys who are too nice do not get dumped for bad boys, they get dumped for guys who have backbone. Guys who realize this don't have to be a doormat to get someone to spend time with them. GROW UP. Being a good little boy may get you a taste of Mama's milk but again, :sick:
Recommended Posts