agnf666 Posted February 2, 2006 Posted February 2, 2006 Well... I knew that we were falling apart... He stopped coming to see me about 2 to 3 weeks ago . Started saying how busy he was. So, then he dropped a few hints about doing things without me and then I knew that things were ending. So, We talked and he starts off by telling me that he is too busy because his band is going to take up most of his time... Then I said "If you really like someone then you find time no matter what!".... Then he said that "I see you more as my friend then anything... " Then after I realized it I did as well... It was awkward kissing him, and other things... Personally I think that we waited to long to date and we did get stuck in the friendszone and tried to get out of it but couldn't....So, he basically lost all his feelings for me... Do you think they can come back... I don't know why I want them too becuase It wouldn't have worked no matter what... but it is still nice to know. Then we had a mutual agreement to stay friends in which that is what he needs more then anything. I went into this relationship knowing that I was going to get hurt so when it ended I wasn't all that upset. I didn't really cry. He got out of a 4 year relationship with "The bitch" about 7 to 8 months ago. So, he had tons of one night stands and stuff, but I think I was the first real relationship after that break up. So, He would talk about her sometimes. There was so many warning signs that I should have picked up on but I didn't want to hurt him so I basically let him do it... He was never over "The bitch"... He even mention her last night when we broke up... So, we decided not to do the NC thing. So, when do you contact each other. My though was I was going to give it a few days and then drop a message to him. Then after we had that conversation we went on to talk about everyday things... Kindof wierd... I will miss him but emotionally I don't think I was that attached to him since I have not cried... Plus, I think I was just dating him to have a boyfriend since I was single of a long time... Now, I feel a little better... That is why I like this site... I can just write what I need to and it makes me feel better...
blind_otter Posted February 2, 2006 Posted February 2, 2006 Good, honey. I'm glad things didn't end badly.
morrigan Posted February 2, 2006 Posted February 2, 2006 Vent and get it out of your system. Then blast the loudest music you have and go out with your friends. Give yourself a little time and space for now. In a couple of weeks or months, you'll be able to view this even more clearly and decide if you want a friendship with him or not.
Becoming Posted February 2, 2006 Posted February 2, 2006 Thanks for the update from the other site. I checked on you there. You kinda knew then, didn't you? So what have you learned about yourself from being in this relationship that you can take into the next?
Author agnf666 Posted February 2, 2006 Author Posted February 2, 2006 I have vented out online and to my close friends. I'm feeling better... From my attitude yesterday to today I see a major improvement with myself. I feel like he was holding me back.... I went to bed last night and woke up this morning a little upset becuase by then it all set in.... So, The next move I made was this and I really wanted to do this just so he knows that I feel this way... So, I messaged him this... Hey...I don't know if you will read this or not but I was true to what I said and do want to remain friends. That would be awesome... You take care of yourself... Let me know how this band works out?? Do you have a name for it yet? Starting a band sounds like fun... You know what I'm still dragging your ass to HFS no matter what!!!!! Unless you don't wanna go... LOL... Oh well..Take Care... Keep in touch! P.S don't fall off the face of the earth! To me that makes me feel better saying that and he knows that I will always be his friend... That is what he needs is friends not a girlfriend. Once he is emotionally and physically over his ex then that is when he should date agian. I have learned alot of things... 1. Watch out for Emotional Baggage.... That can kill a relationship. 2. Do not be afraid to say what you think at anytime... 3. Sometimes being friends is alot better then being anything more... Thank you guys... If I would have never vented on here I would still be a little upset. I feel like a big wieght has been lifted off of me... I feel like I can continue to move on with my life. I feel like I fell into a big rut with him. I was afraid of him leaving me 2 to 3 weeks into the relationship. Since I had that feeling I should have been done with it... but we live and we learn...
Author agnf666 Posted March 11, 2006 Author Posted March 11, 2006 well... we went on to No contact... after the both of us decided we didn't want that, it is what happen. He replied back to the message I wrote to him the day after we split. Then I replied back to that and basically I have heard nothing out of him since... Since there wasn't really a big friendship before this relaionship, I guess I shouldn't look for being friends with this... It sucks too... It's only been a month though...
Becoming Posted March 11, 2006 Posted March 11, 2006 Sorry you lost a friend. That hurts. I hope you also learned not to take care of someone else's feelings at the expense of yours. Here was why I say this: There was so many warning signs that I should have picked up on but I didn't want to hurt him so I basically let him do it...
Author agnf666 Posted March 11, 2006 Author Posted March 11, 2006 I realized that... I know I should have broke it off with him way earlier then when it actually happened... Loosing him as a friend is not the end of the world... I just hope I get to talk to him on maybe a friendly bases one day... It does hurt though... I mean before we dated we had some interesting times together...
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