Shandy Posted January 29, 2006 Posted January 29, 2006 Hi all, I'm wondering if I should be upset over this. My boyfriend and I are long distance, about a 5 hour drive away. He visited me in December for my birthday, but he showed up with no birthday present. This is the first time he has not gotten me anything for a special occasion. I casually asked him about it and he got defensive, saying that he just drove 5 hours to see me. I didn't mention it again. It's not about the present itself as much as he didn't think about me enough to be thoughtful. Should I be upset over this? watch and see if he'll make it up later?
hyakku Posted January 29, 2006 Posted January 29, 2006 He did drive FIVE hours to you, that wasn't the gift?
jen_jen_heartbroken Posted January 29, 2006 Posted January 29, 2006 He did drive FIVE hours to you, that wasn't the gift? NO! That's not the gift. That's about doing what is necessary to be in an LDR. Really, it doesn't take much effort to go to the store to pick up a card and a box of chocolates. She has a right to be hurt. And he had no right to get defensive.
brandon Posted January 29, 2006 Posted January 29, 2006 i beg to differ. if i drove 5 hours to see my girlfriend on her birthday, i think that means a helluva lot more than a box of chocolates and flowers. he got defensive because you're telling him that what he did was not enough! think of it this way, would rather have gotten a box of chocolates in the mail? or have him make the effort to spend some time with you? thats what i thought
whichwayisup Posted January 29, 2006 Posted January 29, 2006 I see both sides here. Can I ask, did he say happy birthday to you? If he did, then maybe the drive and romantic night together was your bday. Still, a quick stop to even buy you flowers would've been nice. Try to let it go. I don't think he did it on purpose.
jen_jen_heartbroken Posted January 29, 2006 Posted January 29, 2006 Let me put this into perspective for you. I once drove four hours to celebrate the birthday of a family member. Do you think I showed up without a gift, proclaiming that my presence was their gift? Hell no!
Forever Searching Posted January 29, 2006 Posted January 29, 2006 I agree with Jen, I think he could have at least picked up some cheap flowers or something. I mean it's just the thought that counts and sure driving to see someone is nice but it's a special day and he could have been just a little thoughtful.
jen_jen_heartbroken Posted January 29, 2006 Posted January 29, 2006 Thank you WWIU. And FS is right...he could have picked up some flowers at the Quickie Mart when he stopped for gas along the way. How hard would that have been? It doesn't take much effort to show someone that you care.
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