emceelaszlo Posted January 26, 2006 Posted January 26, 2006 Hey, im a funny guy and im friends with a ton of girls, but when i find myself attracted to a girl my advances are seen as a joke b/cuz ive already established myself as the funny guy friend. how would i overcome this hurdle to actually start a relationship or rather set the wheels in motion for a realtionship
amerikajin Posted January 26, 2006 Posted January 26, 2006 Let me tell ya something about comedy - it's overrated when it comes to the dating scene. I was known as the class clown at my high school and even by some of my friends in college...it never got me anywhere with chicks though. Girls want humor, no doubt about it, but it's not the stand-up, self-deprecating, night at the improv humor. They want someone who can make a light joke and flip some lighthearted banter back and forth, and occasionally tease the girl a little. The humor you want to use with women should show confidence - even a little cockiness. Leave the stand-up to stand-up comics. To be honest, if you're doing the stand-up stuff or the dirty joke routines, you're better off not even being funny. You're much better off just talking to a girl and getting to know her the same way you'd get to know anyone else.
Author emceelaszlo Posted January 27, 2006 Author Posted January 27, 2006 Let me tell ya something about comedy - it's overrated when it comes to the dating scene. I was known as the class clown at my high school and even by some of my friends in college...it never got me anywhere with chicks though. Girls want humor, no doubt about it, but it's not the stand-up, self-deprecating, night at the improv humor. They want someone who can make a light joke and flip some lighthearted banter back and forth, and occasionally tease the girl a little. The humor you want to use with women should show confidence - even a little cockiness. Leave the stand-up to stand-up comics. To be honest, if you're doing the stand-up stuff or the dirty joke routines, you're better off not even being funny. You're much better off just talking to a girl and getting to know her the same way you'd get to know anyone else. yeah ive heard of this cocky and funny style but i dont really know how to turn into that person from the person that i am, thatsa major transition, u know
Taressa Posted January 27, 2006 Posted January 27, 2006 What kind of advances are you making? Are you doing anything to transition the relationship? How do you let a female friend know you're interested in more than friendship?
monkey00 Posted January 28, 2006 Posted January 28, 2006 based on past experiences its possible to jump out of the friends zone and into something more. However it means you will have to be less available and more unpredictable. in other words you have to be seen as a 'good catch'. Even if it may mean creating competition for them, such as being seen or known that you're dating some other girl. And i do agree with what the others have said, humor goes a long way. But you have to use it in the correct context, such as teasing the girl. but remember no insults! this isnt easy and it may take some time, but if you're patient deal with it. if not then have relationships with women who arent one of your friends.
Author emceelaszlo Posted January 29, 2006 Author Posted January 29, 2006 What kind of advances are you making? Are you doing anything to transition the relationship? How do you let a female friend know you're interested in more than friendship? i guess i try to spend more time with them, in a recent attempt, lol the girl and i went out a few times to frozen yogurt, tehre was a dance comin up, she had invited me to a christmas party she was throwing a few weeks prior. i thougth she was kinda into me. so i asked her on AIM bout a week b4 the dance who she liked, she couldnt come up with an answer. and asked me, i think i played a good game of cat and mouse, like what will ig et if i say etc. but finally she was like say what you want to say or the conversaions over, i was like well i lke you , she was taken aback and said she hadnt noticed a thing. she asked if i was going to the dance, isaid maybe, she had a similar response, iasked if she would wanna go with me and there was no response. ididnt end up goin. it wasnt that heart braking , i liked her, but her rejection really meant, not much. @ school we are stil friends and thats chill. but you see she had no idea i was interested, none. there is this other girl that i do like a whole bunch more that ecently broke up w/ her BF, i def have the funny guy friend relationship with her. one thing she says is that her and her ex bf were friends for a while b4 they got togtehr, and she and i are friends. i like her, we've been friends for a while too, i want to know how to transition from the friend to the bf material, like that guy she had broken up with.
Author emceelaszlo Posted January 29, 2006 Author Posted January 29, 2006 also this girl, i see really once a week @ an extra curricular actvity, she sometimes logs onto AIM but thats really it. the guy she broke up with was in the same extra curricular activity
Vincent Vega Posted January 29, 2006 Posted January 29, 2006 girls don't want a clown. they want a witty guy who knows when to be serious. stop trying to joke around so much. a few here and there is a good thing, and i don't mean jokes. say something that is appropriate for the situation or surroundings that makes her laugh. i don't know, it's hard to explain. on one hand, you have guys who try to be comedians and are always making jokes. they may be funny, but they do not get chicks. on the other hand, you have confident guys who occassionally inject humor into their everyday language. they are unpredictable, they are funny without always meaning it. i sometimes say things that i didn't mean to be funny, but the girl will think it's hilarious. i have no problem getting women because i don't TRY to be anything, i just happen to be it. women can sense when you're trying, it's like they're psychic. so just be yourself, stop trying to be so damn funny. if you're not a funny guy...then i'm sorry. but hey, at least you won't have to waste your energy trying to make people laugh.
Vincent Vega Posted January 29, 2006 Posted January 29, 2006 oh and don't ask a girl if she likes you. i know that by asking her who she likes you weren't directly asking her, but she knew. just don't do it, it reeks of desperation.
amerikajin Posted January 30, 2006 Posted January 30, 2006 Basically agree with VV here. I do think that humor is a great weapon if you know how to use it because girls like to laugh and have a good time. But if you're not all that funny, then just be happy speaking like you normally do. There are plenty of guys out there who don't tell jokes and still get lots of lovin'.
Author emceelaszlo Posted January 31, 2006 Author Posted January 31, 2006 gotcha, hey man i live in the SF bay area too, i live in oakland
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