SmoochieFace Posted January 25, 2006 Posted January 25, 2006 I don't think I will ever understand people in general and they probably will never understand me. I suppose that means those who are only having problems understanding the opposite sex should be grateful in that at least half of all people *understand* them. This *understanding* thing for me isn't gender-specific.
d'Arthez Posted January 25, 2006 Posted January 25, 2006 It takes a lot of time (and effort) to indeed understand people; to know what drives people, to know what people hate and detest; to not be blind to our own perceptions and rationalizations we offer for our own appalling behavior at times. Often, however what seems to be the case, is that we are thinking people are (or should be) similar to ourselves. And with that, of course have similar beliefs about all kinds of social matters and conventions. And we tend to judge those who deviate from the norm(s) we subscribe to.
SmoochieFace Posted January 25, 2006 Posted January 25, 2006 Often' date=' however what seems to be the case, is that we are thinking people are (or should be) similar to ourselves. And with that, of course have similar beliefs about all kinds of social matters and conventions. And we tend to judge those who deviate from the norm(s) we subscribe to.[/quote'] Well, I tend to go against the grain in many ways and that is a major factor in why people do not understand me and why I do not understand them. A lot of it has to do with the fact that I do not want the same things most other people want out of life in general.
Outcast Posted January 25, 2006 Posted January 25, 2006 Yes, there is that unfortunate tendency of many humans to try to force all other humans into conformity.
SmoochieFace Posted January 25, 2006 Posted January 25, 2006 Yes, there is that unfortunate tendency of many humans to try to force all other humans into conformity. It should come as no surprise that I am a certified non-conformist. Always have been and always will be one.
bluechocolate Posted January 25, 2006 Posted January 25, 2006 It should come as no surprise that I am a certified non-conformist. Where can I sign up?
SmoochieFace Posted January 25, 2006 Posted January 25, 2006 Where can I sign up? You'll have to look up the location of your nearest Non-Conformist Society Branch in the Yellow Pages/Paginas Amarillas/Pages Jaunes/whatever and sign up in person at the branch. I'm sure they will have all the necessary forms at your disposal.
bluechocolate Posted January 25, 2006 Posted January 25, 2006 You'll have to look up the location of your nearest Non-Conformist Society Branch in the Yellow Pages/Paginas Amarillas/Pages Jaunes/whatever and sign up in person at the branch. I'm sure they will have all the necessary forms at your disposal. Nah, all that activity will conflict with my membership of the Association of Apathetics. 1
SmoochieFace Posted January 25, 2006 Posted January 25, 2006 Nah, all that activity will conflict with my membership of the Association of Apathetics. Or... you can do what I elected to do... and that is to just BE a non-conformist. I am really not one for formalities anyway... big surprise, huh?
Ladyehawk Posted February 26, 2006 Posted February 26, 2006 Hate to be a real downner, but right now from where I'm at. MEN SUCK !!!!!!!!
jen_jen_heartbroken Posted February 26, 2006 Posted February 26, 2006 Hate to be a real downner, but right now from where I'm at. MEN SUCK !!!!!!!! Agreed. Let's kill 'em all off. We can keep the human-woman species alive with all the frozen sperm and gender-selective reproduction. We women can live without them. They can't live without us.
Becoming Posted February 26, 2006 Posted February 26, 2006 You know, in looking back over this thread, I see why Woggle thinks the way he does about women. He asks an honest question worthy of thoughtful responses, yet we women give this to him? We are better than this, aren't we? If the post were about whether men understand women, we'd be all over that thread. We do the struggle for equal rights with men no favors with male bashing. It only makes it more likely that men will continue to put us down in ways that are even more heinous than what our foremothers fought to be liberated from. We have done nothing but prove Woggle's beliefs about women (as stated elsewhere) right, I fear. If we want to vent against how one or a few men done us wrong, then let's do that elsewhere.
cal gal Posted February 26, 2006 Posted February 26, 2006 I don't think most men can be simply defined as the happy, chomping, shagging animals you seem to be categorising them as - much as some of them like to fall into the comfort zone of that stereotype from time to time. No more than women are the collection of disruptive histrionics you seem to be labelling most of us as (and, by doing so, implicitly disassociating yourself from....) Your post seems to suggest that as long as a woman loves, feeds, waters, allows the beast a good night's sleep and avoids bringing any drama into his life...then everything will be peachy. Is it really that simple? For the men that I generally choose to have as part of my social circle, yes it is that simple. Most of my friends and family are loving men that are caring and considerate of women, children and others feelings. For the most part it has been proven that if the women follow simple guidelines such as these (and it does take a certain attitude to make a man feel important, empowered and a worthy addition to a family unit) then he is more willing to please his wife and family. He would certainly find value in her allowing him to feel in charge. The key is a balance between being submissive and standing firm about your basic value system and beliefs. I know this will be misconstrued, but I'm not saying bow down to his every whim, it is a partnership to be respected. I know it sounds simplistic (and it's not) but I suppose it works if the men don't bring some hard issues into the relationship... a healthy choice in the man to begin with helps in big doses.
Author Woggle Posted February 26, 2006 Author Posted February 26, 2006 You know, in looking back over this thread, I see why Woggle thinks the way he does about women. He asks an honest question worthy of thoughtful responses, yet we women give this to him? We are better than this, aren't we? If the post were about whether men understand women, we'd be all over that thread. We do the struggle for equal rights with men no favors with male bashing. It only makes it more likely that men will continue to put us down in ways that are even more heinous than what our foremothers fought to be liberated from. We have done nothing but prove Woggle's beliefs about women (as stated elsewhere) right, I fear. If we want to vent against how one or a few men done us wrong, then let's do that elsewhere. Say what you want about me but I never advocated killing off all women. This is why I try to stop the woman bashing. When you trash an entire group of people you do your self no favors. This is how the feminist movement shot itself in the foot. It became consumned by hate and alienated more and more people.
Becoming Posted February 27, 2006 Posted February 27, 2006 Say what you want about me but I never advocated killing off all women. This is why I try to stop the woman bashing. When you trash an entire group of people you do your self no favors. This is how the feminist movement shot itself in the foot. It became consumned by hate and alienated more and more people. Precisely. Bashing folks, regardless of gender, just leaves everyone bloody, battered, and bruised. And, really, haven't we had enough of this? I know we all vent on here, etc., but maybe LS helps us see that our words have power to hurt and heal and that each of us needs to be responsible for them. Just because we've been victims of someone else doesn't give us the right to use our power to hurt others. This I have learned the hard way, of course.
serial muse Posted February 27, 2006 Posted February 27, 2006 Precisely. Bashing folks, regardless of gender, just leaves everyone bloody, battered, and bruised. And, really, haven't we had enough of this? I know we all vent on here, etc., but maybe LS helps us see that our words have power to hurt and heal and that each of us needs to be responsible for them. Just because we've been victims of someone else doesn't give us the right to use our power to hurt others. This I have learned the hard way, of course. Becoming, if I could give you a rep point for this, I would. Beautifully said. Not that I miss the rep point system. But it had its uses.
Outcast Posted February 27, 2006 Posted February 27, 2006 Actually, but for the bitter rantings of a couple of recently-hurt people, most of the thread was quite fine. And the rantings just serve to remind Woggle of his persona when he joined. And the rest of us of how illogical we become when wounded.
jen_jen_heartbroken Posted February 27, 2006 Posted February 27, 2006 Is it illogical or wise? I think it's the wisdom that comes with being dumped over and over again. Finally realizing that you're not going to fall for that "love" BS ever again. It doesn't effing exist....at least not for me.
Outcast Posted February 27, 2006 Posted February 27, 2006 A few bad experiences never justify generalization. And in a few months, you'll be saying that to the newest member of the 'bitter club' as you make your exit.
Author Woggle Posted February 27, 2006 Author Posted February 27, 2006 Actually, but for the bitter rantings of a couple of recently-hurt people, most of the thread was quite fine. And the rantings just serve to remind Woggle of his persona when he joined. And the rest of us of how illogical we become when wounded. I agree with this. I don't like it when some women get on that manhating stuff so I try not to bash the female. Truthfully I am kind of surprised at how many women on here actually seem sympathetic to my issues. Hate and bitterness never do anybody any good.
jen_jen_heartbroken Posted February 27, 2006 Posted February 27, 2006 I didn't hate them until they hated me.
Author Woggle Posted February 27, 2006 Author Posted February 27, 2006 jen if somebody like me could learn to love again anybody can.
Outcast Posted February 27, 2006 Posted February 27, 2006 People if he or she doesn't love you back the way you deserve to be loved YOU DON'T NEED THAT PERSON IN YOUR LIFE!!!!! They just have exceedingly bad taste and you're better off without them. Hatred is pointless. Pity's in order - look what they missed out on by missing out on you! But it's their loss, not yours. You two should have gone out and celebrated with champagne and chocolate that those jerks are not in your lives!!!
Becoming Posted February 27, 2006 Posted February 27, 2006 People if he or she doesn't love you back the way you deserve to be loved YOU DON'T NEED THAT PERSON IN YOUR LIFE!!!!! They just have exceedingly bad taste and you're better off without them. Hatred is pointless. Pity's in order - look what they missed out on by missing out on you! But it's their loss, not yours. You two should have gone out and celebrated with champagne and chocolate that those jerks are not in your lives!!! Touche! Right as usual, OC.
SmoochieFace Posted February 27, 2006 Posted February 27, 2006 I didn't hate them until they hated me. When you say *they* are you meaning *all men* or just the ones you have been with or the ones you want?
Recommended Posts