KickAssJane Posted January 22, 2006 Posted January 22, 2006 Hey, I'm a 25 year old lawyer, great personality, attractive and I love life. I have never had a serious boyfriend as I have never met anyone I truly spark with. Anyway, I did meet a guy about 2 weeks ago at a party - we ended up talking for over 4 hours and had a pretty good make out session later on. I was pretty excited about him. He asked me out to our local bar last Tuesday. We met up and had a few drinks then he walked me home. The night went pretty well - no awkward silences, interesting conversation, and a good pash at the end. However now it is Sunday and I still have no heard from him. What the hell is that?? I can't think of anything I did to stuff things up on Tuesday. I followed all the rules - looked great (not too overdressed), didn't dominate the conversation, played it cool but still let him know I liked him etc etc. I feel so rejected. It makes me never want to bother going on a date ever again. I mean, why bother?? At least when you're single you have nothing to lose. I cannot do anything more to impress someone than I did with this guy. I never find someone I like and the first time it has happened in over a year - it falls flat. Any clues as to why this guy rejected me??
Weye Posted January 22, 2006 Posted January 22, 2006 It could be for any number of reasons. Maybe he decided to go back with his ex, maybe he met someone new, maybe he just felt like something didn't click when you were out. You say you followed all the rules, but sometimes following rules can backfire. Its Sunday, and he didn't call you. Did you try calling him? If not, try calling, he could be overjoyed to hear from you. Another possibility. You say you're a 25 years old lawyer, attractive, and have a great personality. Many guys, unfortunately, are intimidated by successful women. Perhaps you just haven't met a man who was good enough for you yet Keep look and he's bound to turn up.
Outcast Posted January 22, 2006 Posted January 22, 2006 Someone not calling you back has nothing to do with you. You can't expect everybody you meet to fall for you. You have to keep fishing and throwing them back until you get a keeper. Doesn't mean the ones you threw back weren't any good, just that they weren't to your taste.
konfuzd Posted January 22, 2006 Posted January 22, 2006 You only met this guy 2 weeks ago. I say this from experience, 5 days between phone calls doesn't always mean he's rejecting you. Many guys don't want to jump into a relationship with a girl he's just met. Maybe he's testing you (guys like to do this, consciously or not, I still am not sure, because they rarely fess up to it)... he wants to see if you are the clingy, obsessive type, or if you have the ability to go out and have fun on your own without him. IMO, I think you should go out continue dating or just hanging out with friends, but I don't think you should write this guy off. You do, however want some good conversation pieces for when he calls you. The last thing he'll want is a conversation like this: Him: "Hey, how's it goin? Sorry it's been a while since we've talked, but I've been kind of busy, what have you been up to?" You:"nothing, just sat on the couch eating ice cream wondering why you never called me." If, on the other hand, you can talk about some great little cafe you and your friends found, or a great movie you saw, it eases the conversation along a lot better, and he'll know that similar to your professional life, you are a strong, independent woman in your personal life, and he can decide whether he is the type to embrace it, or run, but it's a good time to find all that out. Good luck to you (from a single architect who's in the same boat) I really hope he calls!!!
Realist Posted January 26, 2006 Posted January 26, 2006 Chances are that if he wants a "relationship", he's not going to want it with someone who "puts out" on the first date. He'll be thinking that if you do it with him, you'll do it with everyone. Not many guys want to settle down with someone who's easy. I know I wouldn't. Chances are you'll hear from him when he wants to make out. Next time you meet a guy that you really like, try waiting. Show him that you've got some self respect.
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