PlentyLV007 Posted January 19, 2006 Posted January 19, 2006 There's a person that's been in my life for almost 10 years! GREAT GUY!!! GREAT PERSONLITY, EVEN QUITE ATTRACTIVE!!!! We've been in a relationship (8 years ago) but I didn't feel it (probably too young) but,....he's too needy, insecure, thought I was always cheating, not into what I like (dancing, nightclubs), I'm more of a hip hop Girlie girl, and he's more of the Pubs, rocker and live bands kinda guy. I see nothing wrong with our interest, being different and variety is good! I love talking to him and being around him...he is fun! WAY FUN! Now we've been great friends...but, last night he says...he can't be my friend anymore because he still cares for me and can't see me with anybody else. I was in shock! Em I being selfish just being his friend!? What's the best thing to do?
bluechocolate Posted January 19, 2006 Posted January 19, 2006 What's the best thing to do? Respect his decision. It doesn't have to mean forever. Time away from you may be what he needs to either get over you and/or meet someone else, then you can be friends again.
Author PlentyLV007 Posted January 19, 2006 Author Posted January 19, 2006 He's like my partner in crime, we talk about everything....girls, guys, relationships and everything!!!
Weye Posted January 19, 2006 Posted January 19, 2006 Sounds like he wants you back. Give him his space for a while and he'll likely get over it sooner or later.
Gator762 Posted January 19, 2006 Posted January 19, 2006 Either what's been said before, or he can't take it, and it's an ultimatum. He could be going for broke to hook up. If you are going to lose the friendship anyway, I'd consider dating the guy! Your lover should also be your best friend anyway, and you do say you find him quite attractive!
Author PlentyLV007 Posted January 19, 2006 Author Posted January 19, 2006 I've dated him and like I said he had insecurities, didn't trust me, very needy and didn't like me being with my friends w/ out him. Have you ever had a friend of the opposite sex who you are just cool with and always found comfort no matter what? Or maybe it just happens more with women...who knows!? Yeah I know he's a good looking but there is just no "spark" there. We make better friends than lovers. We can lean on each other and it's great. He just had an epiphany and it dawn on me that he can't be my friend after so long. I also did look at it as an ultamadum...telling me "date me" or "just don't talk to me". Which so sucked!!!! He made a comment..."men and women can't be friends" I think what he was trying to say is "men who are attracted to women cannot be friends" I mean is this true? I feel that is what he is saying..?
camel Posted January 19, 2006 Posted January 19, 2006 Give him some time. I've been in the same situation. After a while or after he meets someone else, he will be able to hang out with you again. Respect him and his agony...leave him alone.
noclobber Posted January 20, 2006 Posted January 20, 2006 If you are going to lose the friendship anyway, I'd consider dating the guy! is it not like an emotional blackmail? PlentyLV007, what would you do if your friend makes such a statement?
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