Tips for moving on

[Vilja]

Hello.

Im fresh out of a relationship and am at a bit of a loss. Im 22. My ex and i were childhood friends. Dated in teens. We were always close, but now that its over, i feel like i dont quite know how to approach new people, how to put myself out there for a restart.

Im pretty sure ontop of that, im quite sure im cutting a big chunk of the pool out, cause i dont want kids. At all. No desire for it. This was the reason for me and my ex breaking up aswell. 

So yeah, id appreciate tips on how to restart. Maybe people who had similar experiences have something to share? Idk. Ill take any tips i can get.

Thanks.

[Sanch62]

Have you built a healthy, well-rounded social life?

If not, start there, from the ground up, over time. Let the dating incorporate itself into that naturally as your scope expands and you keep meeting new people.

[ShyViolet]

On 3/11/2026 at 2:25 AM, Vilja said:

Im pretty sure ontop of that, im quite sure im cutting a big chunk of the pool out, cause i dont want kids. At all. No desire for it. 

 

You shouldn't think of it this way.  You phrase it as if you're doing something wrong by not wanting kids.  Everyone is "cutting a chunk of the pool out" in some way.  The people who want kids are "cutting out" all of the people who don't.  People who only want to date someone tall are "cutting out" short people.  Everyone has criteria, preferences and non-negotiables in dating.  Since you know you don't want kids, don't compromise on that.  And there is no point of saying that you're limiting yourself or cutting out a chunk of the pool..... you're not going to compromise on something as important and fundamental as this, so what's the point of thinking of it as a negative?