in gradschool and 34 years old. feel fcking hopeless because I never had a girlfriend and now I'm screwed living with parents :(

[cashny3]

forgive me as I posted this in the wrong section before. I'm at the point where I just feel like ending it. I never figured out what I wanted to do in life, have mental health disorders, and now I'm scrambling to get my life together because of it. After this semester I'll be half way done with this public health program if I can continue and then I would get my masters. I only got into this because it was 42 credits and didn't have any prerequisites. I only have entry level experience and no experience to get a better job. but the salaries don't sound promising.

 

I'm honestly ready to end it all. I'm tired of being single and miserable. My therapist says it shouldn't affect my dating life at all but I no that isn't true. almost every woman on reddit says its a dealbreaker. At this point I'll probably be living here until my parents are dead. I honestly don't wanna be alive anymore either because of this. idk what to do.

 

All my peers are thriving and here I am....a worthless pos loser who fcked his life up.

Edited yesterday at 03:26 AM by cashny3

[FredEire]

I understand feeling behind in life. I'm 32, nor married and only had one serious relationship that didnt work out. Im also in an industry that doesnt pay great and struggling to find my way in the employment sphere.

What I find useful is to think of it this way: today is always the first day of the rest of your life. You could be an executive with 7 figures in the bank, a wife and a happy life and in the space of a few weeks or a few months your wife leaves you, your company goes bust and you are broke and starting at square one again, basically in the same place you find yourself now. I have met many such people. Life is not linear progress but thats the way people like to depict it to comfort themselves.

Age gives us generic markers for where we "should" be at a certain point in your life but we are all so different and on different paths, and many of the people we think are ahead are struggling in their own ways.

There is really no use limiting yourself because you feel you haven't done enough, the past is gone and the important thing to focus on is that you are here alive and kicking, today. Whether you are 14, 24, 34, or 74 the same still applies, you have to focus on living the rest of your life to the fullest, and there are still many doors open to you if you can bring yourself to pursue them

Edited 8 hours ago by FredEire

[cashny3]

2 hours ago, FredEire said:

I understand feeling behind in life. I'm 32, nor married and only had one serious relationship that didnt work out. Im also in an industry that doesnt pay great and struggling to find my way in the employment sphere.

What I find useful is to think of it this way: today is always the first day of the rest of your life. You could be an executive with 7 figures in the bank, a wife and a happy life and in the space of a few weeks or a few months your wife leaves you, your company goes bust and you are broke and starting at square one again, basically in the same place you find yourself now. I have met many such people. Life is not linear progress but thats the way people like to depict it to comfort themselves.

Age gives us generic markers for where we "should" be at a certain point in your life but we are all so different and on different paths, and many of the people we think are ahead are struggling in their own ways.

There is really no use limiting yourself because you feel you haven't done enough, the past is gone and the important thing to focus on is that you are here alive and kicking, today. Whether you are 14, 24, 34, or 74 the same still applies, you have to focus on living the rest of your life to the fullest, and there are still many doors open to you if you can bring yourself to pursue them

I appreciate your in depth response that goes beyond "call the help line" which wouldn't of been a bad suggestion either. and yea it's hard because I'm addicted to social media and can't stop focusing on all my peers who make close to 6 figures, moved out, have happy relationships and get to travel the world.

[Gebidozo]

2 hours ago, cashny3 said:

it's hard because I'm addicted to social media and can't stop focusing on all my peers who make close to 6 figures, moved out, have happy relationships and get to travel the world.

Maybe you should start by understanding that much of what you see on social media is an illusion. Checking some actual facts about how most people live might help get a clearer picture of it.

For example, there are only a couple of countries in the whole world where the average annual income is low 6 figures. Which means that even in those countries, most people don’t make that much (since averages are skewed towards the higher numbers because there is always a tiny amount of people that are unimaginably rich).

And we’re talking about abnormally rich countries like Monaco. In Burundi, average annual income is about 300$. Yes, three hundred dollars. Per year.

Only a small percentage of people can afford travel. The majority of people on our planet stay in the same location and work very hard just to stay alive.

Moving out? Try living in one house or even one room with several generations of your family. That’s how most people live. Grandparents, parents, a bunch of kids. Very few people can afford to live independently.

As for happy relationships, I hope you don’t need to browse through statistics website to realize how absurd it is to assume that most people have them.

Being in a genuinely happy relationship that lasts many years and doesn’t end in a break up is a very rare occasion. Most people in the world are stuck in relationships because they have to, due to religious and cultural prescriptions, social stigma, and financial considerations. Many of them didn’t even choose to be in those relationships.

Those that have freedom to be with people they actually choose and leave whenever they want to struggle immensely and spend a lot of time and effort to find the right partner, which is anything but guaranteed.

Their small chance of success decidedly depends on their mindset. Complaining about one’s own life and envying the lives of others is deeply unattractive. Start by counting your blessings and loving yourself and your life.

 

 

Edited 4 hours ago by Gebidozo

[ExpatInItaly]

On 2/7/2026 at 4:24 AM, cashny3 said:

almost every woman on reddit says its a dealbreaker.

Says what is a dealbreaker, exactly?