DEBTEX Posted January 18, 2006 Posted January 18, 2006 Wow!! I am glad i found this sight. I feel SO alone these days....and find myself hysterically crying almost all day. my husband & I have been together for 8 yrs, He has adopted my 13 yr old son 5 yrs ago, and we just had a baby 18 months ago. since the birth of our baby....not only have things been so distant--I've had to ask him to leave in october (even briefly in september..) he began doing drugs, and NEVER wanting to be home....only wanted to hang out with WHOEVER!! I had caught him in lies for over 2 yrs. usually STUPID lies...but none the less...ones that I asked specifics about-because I KNEW he was lying....and NEVER would i get the truth! I was so angry at him for giving me sh** for money during christmas time b-cuz he knew what little I made--and he made enough cash under the table to keep what he wanted for NO bills. but we were such close friends for years before we even dated...and had spend our last 10 christmas' together, so I allowed him to spend Christmas with us. well, he was acting so strange. LITERALLY right on top of his cell phone....even "slept" with it! so I figured out the password....and heard a message from another woman on their. (MIDNITE ON CHRISTMAS EVE)!! I was DEVESTATED!! He swore she is just a friend...but yet a friend he NEVER wants me to meet. of all the things I never believed in him...the ONE thing I had always trusted was his loyalty. because we were working on a "constructive" seperation. still spending time together with the kids. course there were plenty that we did figth (mostly ME) because of his "new found love" for his freedom. & hangning out...which not that I cared much...but i NEVER got to do. and he always acted like I had to ask him to BABYSIT his own kids! like he just did me this HUGE favor, cuz he spent 2 hours without me there...with him and the kids!... ok...so a few more days of depression..but working out a decent friendship. I go on an road job with him...and while he is doing the job, I find A CONDOM in his wallet!@!!!! THEN a PACK of them in his console!! AGAIN...crushed. I have to see this man because of my kids. but it tears me apart ANYTIME i see him and think of what he is doing with other women!! so this past weekend...he is very sick. course...doesn't he call ME all weekend...and all hours of the night. so I take him to the hospital. Surprizingly he offers his phone so I can call our son. (wow?) and OF COURSE...I look thru the contacts. dont I find a SHEILA on their. ask him a few hours later about it. "she was someone I met while we were fighting, I never talked to her tho"... Well, when I went home...you KNOW I called "sheila". he told her we were already filed for divorce, and he had taken her out to dinner--but that nothing happened. (not that THAT part matters now). and she had talked to him as recently as 2 days, when he got sick!!!! AGAIN...I confont him...he hung up on me. he stayed sick for FIVE days...and again...I feel badly for him...and for even the fact that I want to be his friend. so AGAIN take him to the hospital, where they admitted him. (this is today), so I come home and call "girl #1" from the answering machine. I hear she is a bald chick who is a HUGE drug addict. so I ask her what her relationship with him is....and she RIPS MY HEAD OFF. we've been friends since I was 12, (friends,huh..funny how he didnt hang with you until HE MOVED OUT OF MY HOUSE)...and she called him that night for a FRIEND of hers who wanted to talk to him. (and NOW that I find this out...NOW I know "who" he was with on Christmas night)... I am tired of crying. he is admitted to the hospital where I work. I want so badly to confront him...but I know he is sick. but he isnt relying or wanting anyone else right now...and I DONT want to give him any affection, and I know I would be better of NOT seeing him....but I just dont know "how" to go about doing it??? I'm glad I feel like I have some support. Everyone tries to be so supportive and encouraging...but they are not dealing with ANY of these issues! bless you all!! We are strong! and with support, there isn't ANY wall we cant climb!
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