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fliritng or friendly?

ikonik

By ikonik
in Cheating, Flirting, and Jealousy

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ikonik Established Member

ikonik

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I work at a gym and I've become friendly with customers, one who, the other day was walking toward the front desk where I was, the whole time she was walking back, she was smiling at me. I looked at her because I noticed her from my side view but I looked back trying to play it cool. She was ultimately just asking for equipment but normally people don't smile that long it's just like a quick one and that's it. AM I reading too much into it or what? Another time she was walking with her friend pass my desk and turned backt to me and smiled, it wasn't like a flirty smile but still more than other customers would do I assume. For context, my first interaaction was when I helped her with an issue I made small talk with her helping her, but not anything too crazy, jsut asked how she liked the gym.

basil67 Established Member

basil67

Posted
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Is this the same girl you previously wrote about?   

It's been six months and neither of you has made a move.  Nothing can possibly come of this unless one of you takes action!   And "playing it cool" is probably the worst thing you can do if you're actually interested.  All it's doing is showing her that you don't care enough to engage

 

 

 

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ikonik Established Member

ikonik

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Posted (edited)
1 minute ago, basil67 said:

Is this the same girl you previously wrote about?   

It's been six months and neither of you has made a move.  Nothing can possibly come of this unless one of you takes action!   And "playing it cool" is probably the worst thing you can do if you're actually interested.  All it's doing is showing her that you don't care enough to engage

 

 

 

no it's a new girl, new gym

Edited by ikonik
basil67 Established Member

basil67

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OK.  So what's with feigning disinterest?  

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ikonik Established Member

ikonik

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5 minutes ago, basil67 said:

OK.  So what's with feigning disinterest?  

?

basil67 Established Member

basil67

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7 minutes ago, ikonik said:

?

Playing it cool means that you are trying to show that you don’t care about an outcome.  It’s a giant “whatever”

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Gebidozo Established Member

Gebidozo

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1 hour ago, ikonik said:

I looked back trying to play it cool.

Well, if you keep doing that, nothing will ever come out of it.

No normal woman will be interested in a guy who “plays it cool”.

Just approach her and ask her out for a coffee or something.

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ikonik Established Member

ikonik

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1 minute ago, Gebidozo said:

Well, if you keep doing that, nothing will ever come out of it.

No normal woman will be interested in a guy who “plays it cool”.

Just approach her and ask her out for a coffee or something.

true. do you think she's interested? i looked back because I thought'd be weird if i locked eyes with her for that long.

Gebidozo Established Member

Gebidozo

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1 hour ago, ikonik said:

do you think she's interested?

Impossible to tell until you ask her out on a date.

The level of interest is always directly deduced from the corresponding acts, never before them.

For example, if a girl says “yes” when you ask her out on a date, then she is interested enough to go out on one date with you. Possibly more, but there is no way to know for sure until more actually happens.

 

basil67 Established Member

basil67

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Posted
2 hours ago, ikonik said:

true. do you think she's interested? i looked back because I thought'd be weird if i locked eyes with her for that long.

Yes, it's weird if you just both stand there staring at each other.  So to make it more comfortable, one of you needs to speak.   Simply smiling and saying good morning/afternoon and asking how their day has been is enough to get a conversation going. 

Remember that a woman who is confident enough to initiate a smile with a stranger is going to want a guy with the confidence to pick up and run with the interaction. 

Of course, I can't tell you if she was flirting or friendly, but the only way to find out is to start a conversation.  

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ExpatInItaly Established Member

ExpatInItaly

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Posted
5 hours ago, ikonik said:

true. do you think she's interested? 

There is not enough interactinon between you to determine that. 

The only way you will be able to tell is if you actually talk to her and feel things out. 

flitzanu Established Member

flitzanu

Posted
Posted

also be careful about being the creepy guy that works at the gym that hits on customers and makes them uneasy.

FredEire Established Member

FredEire

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On 11/12/2025 at 11:30 PM, ikonik said:

true. do you think she's interested? i looked back because I thought'd be weird if i locked eyes with her for that long.

Maybe, maybe not.

The only way you know is if you actually talk to her. If shes polite and a bit disengaged, just shrug your shoulders and move on. If shes engaged and flirty, you can suggest meeting up some time and get her contact.

Either way thats how you have your answer. Nobody on this forum is going to be able to tell you one way or another.

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ikonik Established Member

ikonik

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3 hours ago, FredEire said:

Maybe, maybe not.

The only way you know is if you actually talk to her. If shes polite and a bit disengaged, just shrug your shoulders and move on. If shes engaged and flirty, you can suggest meeting up some time and get her contact.

Either way thats how you have your answer. Nobody on this forum is going to be able to tell you one way or another.

When I was first helping her I asked how she likes the gym and she said "all her friends go here and she goes to nearby so she loves it"

FredEire Established Member

FredEire

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Posted
4 minutes ago, ikonik said:

When I was first helping her I asked how she likes the gym and she said "all her friends go here and she goes to nearby so she loves it"

Ok... and did you abruptly end the conversation there?

You need to have some faith in your ability to judge the vibe between you. Because no woman is going to just jump on you and say "take me now".

It sounds like a pretty normal thing to say whether she fancies you or not.

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ikonik Established Member

ikonik

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27 minutes ago, FredEire said:

Ok... and did you abruptly end the conversation there?

You need to have some faith in your ability to judge the vibe between you. Because no woman is going to just jump on you and say "take me now".

It sounds like a pretty normal thing to say whether she fancies you or not.

No after I was done I said "I think you're gonna have a real good workout" She responded "lets goooo"

basil67 Established Member

basil67

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Posted (edited)

This is all sounding very friendly, but not romantic.   FWIW, I smile and say Hi to people at the gym, but it doesn't mean I want to date them. 

The only way to take it further would be if she tends to want to stop and talk for a while each time she sees you.   That said, I guess you could ask her out at this point but only if you're very prepared for her to say "no" and for it to be awkward for a bit

Edited by basil67
smackie9 Established Member

smackie9

Posted
Posted

Dude this is how you do it....you ask her out/for her number, plain and simple. What if she says no? Well that's how the game works...you ask them out, if they are truly interested they will say yes. That's all there is to it. Sitting around hoping for a clear signal, or trying to read into it is a waste of time. Confident men get dates, men who sit and over analyze are lonely. 

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