New close friend has a gf but constantly flirting & “pursuing” me

[tonichilds]

So I became friends with this guy who started off as just my coworker over the summer. When we met we were just cool until about a week or 2 into the job and he starts flirting with me and making flirtatious jokes about me to our coworkers/mutual friends at first I didn’t think much of it since it’s known he was a gf so I just thought I was thinking of it wrong until it was a everyday thing & everyone else started pointing it out to me also. Eventually he tries to “confront” me sort of saying he wants to “respect his relationship” blah blah and we should stop flirting. I really didnt like this approach because I wasn’t the one initiating  anything so I kept my distance for the next few weeks before he comes back apologizing saying he jumped the gun & only said that out of misplaced anger. But then continues to flirt with me the rest of the summer going as far as to check in on me when I had an exam (summer classes) & constantly call me and find me on Instagram. He even called out of work once when I said wasn’t going to be going in. 

Fast forward to now we don’t work together anymore and have hung out a few times with mutual friends. Until just recently he’s been calling me everyday/all day like wanting to stay on the phone/ falls asleep on FaceTime, when I mentioned I was going to a Halloween party at this club he came and says “he only came out because of me”, when I don’t answer the phone he questions it, etc. 

He never mentions the gf not just to me but to anyone else, no one has ever seen her, he doesn’t post her, they’re never on the phone, and some of his friends I've met have also said they don’t know about her. We just recently hung out in his dorm and there is no sign of a woman being in there and I noticed the app tinder on his phone. 
it feels weird to spend this much time/ talking to someone who supposedly is someone else’s man.
I know should probably just come out and confront him about it but how do I do that or just what should I do? 

Edited Monday at 09:31 PM by tonichilds

[stillafool]

1 hour ago, tonichilds said:

It feels weird to spend this much time/ talking to someone who supposedly is someone else’s man.

I bet.  Why are you spending your precious time on a man who you already know has a girlfriend?

What should you do?

Find a guy who doesn't have a girlfriend and spend time with him.

[tonichilds]

18 minutes ago, stillafool said:

I bet.  Why are you spending your precious time on a man who you already know has a girlfriend?

What should you do?

Find a guy who doesn't have a girlfriend and spend time with him.

Honestly because on my end I only view him as a friend before anything else so I feel bad trying to just completely cut him off. But you’re absolutely right 

[Gebidozo]

I don’t quite understand why you haven’t cut off your connection with him.

You do realize that it is not friendship, right?

Friends don’t hit on each other and don’t have obviously conflicted, ambiguous feelings for each other. The guy likes you romantically and keeps bouncing between you and his girlfriend, because he wants to keep you both as options.

This is not how friends behave.

[ExpatInItaly]

This guy would give me the creeps, honestly. This is not normal behaviour: 

7 hours ago, tonichilds said:

constantly call me and find me on Instagram. He even called out of work once when I said wasn’t going to be going in. 

7 hours ago, tonichilds said:

just recently he’s been calling me everyday/all day like wanting to stay on the phone/ falls asleep on FaceTime

7 hours ago, tonichilds said:

I mentioned I was going to a Halloween party at this club he came and says “he only came out because of me”, when I don’t answer the phone he questions it,

Do you not see the shades of unhinged here? 

 

[Sanch62]

The guy might be 'restraining order' material.