No Stress Lady Posted January 17, 2006 Posted January 17, 2006 http://www.women.timesonline.co.uk/article/0,,17909-1988387_1,00.html Not sure what everyone will think of this but it's another perspective I guess...
lindya Posted January 17, 2006 Posted January 17, 2006 http://www.women.timesonline.co.uk/article/0,,17909-1988387_1,00.html Not sure what everyone will think of this but it's another perspective I guess... That was like reading an extended version of a typical Loveshack post. Perhaps the writer is one of our many lurkers?
bluechocolate Posted January 17, 2006 Posted January 17, 2006 Microwave Man often writes in an abrasive & tongue-in-cheek manner, but a pretty good perspective, I thought.
Author No Stress Lady Posted January 17, 2006 Author Posted January 17, 2006 Yes, he's certainly got strong views but I think he does raise some pertinent points - we've all got a different story to tell but I think there are quite a few posters here that may find it uncomfortable reading. I know some MM DO leave their wives eventually but it does seem to be the exception rather than the rule.
Sami_D Posted January 17, 2006 Posted January 17, 2006 Well it didn't hold my attention long enough to dodge the stupid adverts that kept trying to obscure the text. I thought it was glib and somewhat outdated and sexist. Then again I would say that, since the three other people I know who are having affairs are actually OM... and all of them are in a worse emotional state than I am at the moment. He'd have done better had he not restricted it to the MM/OW angle. OM might not be posting on LS, but believe me, they're out there.
bluechocolate Posted January 17, 2006 Posted January 17, 2006 He'd have done better had he not restricted it to the MM/OW angle. OM might not be posting on LS, but believe me, they're out there. He didn't restrict it to the MM/OW angle - if you had read on you would have discovered that he has been the OM, more than once.
Author No Stress Lady Posted January 17, 2006 Author Posted January 17, 2006 Exactly Blue Chocolate I thought this comment was quite funny - and spot on - coming as it does from a one-time OM: "The first thing, I suppose, is a question of quantity over quality. I have had one or two (OK, four or five) relationships with happily married/boyfriended women (occasionally, more or less simultaneously), and I suppose the effect of this has been to dilute my emotional and/or physical reliance on any one of them. And then I haven’t exactly been moping around, polishing my nails and preening my bikini line, waiting for any of them to leave their partners" I think he's hit the nail on the head here - if you're going to get involved with someone who's already attached/married then at least acknowledge the fact that they're already taken - and in most probability always will be - and at maintain your own life too - I think that's very good advice
travellingman Posted January 17, 2006 Posted January 17, 2006 http://www.women.timesonline.co.uk/article/0,,17909-1988387_1,00.html Not sure what everyone will think of this but it's another perspective I guess... Thanks for posting, interesting read.
BUTAFLY Posted January 18, 2006 Posted January 18, 2006 There are some excellent points in here. Theses are my fav. the smarter the woman, the more likely she is to fall into the trap. It’s not just women’s sensitivity and innate romantic inclination that is their undoing. She believes in herself so firmly that she finds it impossible to see how any man in his right mind couldn’t fall for her. OK ladies and OM ....you know you like that one. I never, in a million years would have thought I would be in the emotional state I was in. He doesn’t set out to be cruel, but sooner or later he will tell her he loves her (because, after a while, it just gets embarrassing if you don’t) and, once she starts putting on the pressure, he will say almost anything to forestall the dawning of reality. How many times did I find myself say to may gf's "But he hold me he loved me!" I can laught at it now, but then I was devistated. If he really cared about you, do you think he could bear to see you suffer? That’s why he always goes back to his wife. He loves her, and he couldn’t bear to see her suffer. The man is speaking the truth. All in all good article and thanx for posting.
Adunaphel Posted January 18, 2006 Posted January 18, 2006 Thank you for posting a link to the article. A very interesting read. And a good wake-up call.
Sami_D Posted January 18, 2006 Posted January 18, 2006 He didn't restrict it to the MM/OW angle - if you had read on you would have discovered that he has been the OM, more than once. I did read that in a short paragraph near the end..? The one where he says that OM never get involved in these things in same way that 'cat pee smelling women' do..? Yes, of COURSE they never do. He's using a sample of one man here. Himself. And he's been involved with HOW many married women..? lol.
HotCaliGirl Posted January 18, 2006 Posted January 18, 2006 I did read that in a short paragraph near the end..? The one where he says that OM never get involved in these things in same way that 'cat pee smelling women' do..? A great article, very entertaining too...I like his style of writing. Yes, towards the end he does mention that on many occassions (like "four or five") he has been the OM but makes the difference that whereas OW sit around desperately waiting for their man to leave their wives, he being in the OM situation, along with other men, knOw not to expect that. He didn't sit around waiting for them. " And then I haven’t exactly been moping around, polishing my nails and preening my bikini line, waiting for any of them to leave their partners. " (Jonathan Gornall) He says whereas men play PlayStation and get their frustrations out elsewhere, women put all their emotions into the relationship hoping for the impossible, believing that their OM will leave their partner for them, becoming an emotional wreck. He says whereas women see more of a future as far as having children are concerned - occupied at fantasizing about having and raising them hence a future to look forward to - men only see death ahead and have affairs to postpone or distract that thought. A lot of it is tongue in cheek before a lot of women get all hyped up about it. (PS to Gold Pile there is a reference to a blow-up doll you might find of interest LOL:lmao: )
Sami_D Posted January 18, 2006 Posted January 18, 2006 Yes, towards the end he does mention that on many occassions (like "four or five") he has been the OM but makes the difference that whereas OW sit around desperately waiting for their man to leave their wives, he being in the OM situation, along with other men, knOw not to expect that. He didn't sit around waiting for them. " And then I haven’t exactly been moping around, polishing my nails and preening my bikini line, waiting for any of them to leave their partners. " (Jonathan Gornall) He says whereas men play PlayStation and get their frustrations out elsewhere, women put all their emotions into the relationship hoping for the impossible, believing that their OM will leave their partner for them, becoming an emotional wreck. He says whereas women see more of a future as far as having children are concerned - occupied at fantasizing about having and raising them hence a future to look forward to - men only see death ahead and have affairs to postpone or distract that thought. A lot of it is tongue in cheek before a lot of women get all hyped up about it. Yes... a lot of is IS tongue in cheek. And hopefully no-one is taking it as some kind of relationship Gospel. lol. As I said... I know three men who are all involved with MW. One of them has been in that position for 7 years, and believe me, he's not happily playing on his Playstation when he's not seeing her.
HotCaliGirl Posted January 18, 2006 Posted January 18, 2006 ... As I said... I know three men who are all involved with MW. One of them has been in that position for 7 years, and believe me, he's not happily playing on his Playstation when he's not seeing her. LOL ... no kidding!! funny.. Also, even though I'm not an OW I think he underestimates the number of men who may in fact be in love with their OW. But I HAVE unfortunately wasted a lot of time buying into words and promises of men who say they'll eventually marry me when they had no intentions of it. A lot of it I can sadly relate to, waiting for him to 'come to his senses' or take the next step, especially after they say "I love you" and you don't know that they didn't really mean it. I wonder how common that is for men.
bigdummy Posted January 21, 2006 Posted January 21, 2006 I have seen a lot of guys in my town leave their wives for other women and then stay with them. It happens. What I can't believe is that if you look likeyour photo why any guy would leave you. And, judging by your posts, you seem very reasonably, funny and smart. ?????
littleflowerpot Posted January 22, 2006 Posted January 22, 2006 I thought it was glib and somewhat outdated and sexist. . yes, it was glib, outdated and sexist. it was some of the most mysognistic pap i've read lately. i don't even care what good points he may have made - his stereotyping just put me off.
My_Other_I Posted January 22, 2006 Posted January 22, 2006 Good read. Thanks. It's very interesting to read the replies. You can tell where each person stands, and also who felt uncomfortable reading it. Funny how the same article/thing has a different effect on people - depending on experience and recent situation. Very interesting.
littleflowerpot Posted January 22, 2006 Posted January 22, 2006 it's sexist pap. sorry, but i'm calling it like i see it.
My_Other_I Posted January 22, 2006 Posted January 22, 2006 it's sexist pap. sorry, but i'm calling it like i see it. I didn't say that it was either - good or bad. I just said that the replies are interesting. I've been on both sides of the boat, I can relate to most of the comments.
Author No Stress Lady Posted January 23, 2006 Author Posted January 23, 2006 It's written tongue in cheek - if you miss that then you're one of the uncomfortable readers lol
Author No Stress Lady Posted January 23, 2006 Author Posted January 23, 2006 Last post not aimed at My_Other_I l;)
My_Other_I Posted January 23, 2006 Posted January 23, 2006 Last post not aimed at My_Other_I l;) Phew! I was starting to feel uncomfortable reading your post!
HotCaliGirl Posted January 23, 2006 Posted January 23, 2006 What I can't believe is that if you look likeyour photo why any guy would leave you. And, judging by your posts, you seem very reasonably, funny and smart. ????? Good looks do not equate to high levels of happiness and a successful relationship! as to your comment that I'm reasonable, funny and smart, thank you to that! LOL I think the majority of the population goes through a lot of ups and downs before they find themselves in a happy, healthy relationship!!! My heart is all banged up with bruises but I have hope that I'll still meet the right man one day who will treat me right:love:
BUTAFLY Posted January 23, 2006 Posted January 23, 2006 I often find men are intemidated by good looking women. They think the women will leave them for someone better so men tend to treat them as temporary fun, a conquest if you will, and don't like to get to attached. This was explained to me by a few male friends of mine like being over qualifiyed for a job...the company will have to pay you more and there is always the threat of you being recruited by another company. (This is not meant to sound conceited so please no bashing.)
bluechocolate Posted January 23, 2006 Posted January 23, 2006 It's written tongue in cheek - if you miss that then you're one of the uncomfortable readers lol Ha! I was thinking the same thing. His schtick is usually wrting about being a middle aged single bloke (I think he was married at one time) and The Times describes him as Bridget Jones' sleazier older brother. This from an interview: Who/What is your biggest influence? After my penis...............
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