Not supporting wife when I believe she’s wrong - and her reaction

[glows]

13 hours ago, BMI03 said:

Totally agree. Like I said in my earlier post, my mind always goes to understanding cause and effect. That desire to understand ‘why’ is sometimes mistook by some as looking for an excuse. I am not. It doesn’t excuse it. It was plain old inappropriate as I have stated. What that explanation is, is an explanation to why I continue to stay despite her inappropriate behavior…because I understand the life sequences that have brought her here.
 

She. Has started the path with her first psychologist appointment. It maybtake a few to find someone aligned correctly for her but I’m happy to see that. 
 

thanks again

You’re both very different. She just needs to understand that her actions and reactions affect the people around her and learn to react proportionately to the situation not flip out like a total maniac bc she’s asked to move by professionals doing their job. Controlling the alcohol intake is a start and embarrassing for her to think she’s above everyone else just because she has childhood trauma and is a doctor. Please. That’s plain arrogance and lack of respect for others in the first place drinking herself silly like she’s a teenager allowed to sleep over at besties for the first time with no parents around. 

I can appreciate you love her and built a life with her so your lenses are all kinds of colours and special fondness. It doesn’t negate the fact that she’s a shitty human who doesn’t mitigate risk factors(alcohol) that exacerbate the problem(her spiralling mental health). 

I hope you continue to take care of yourself without getting lost in this person’s issues in all the analysis. It helps to take a breather and balance things by having healthy family and friends relationships and being around others who do not put you in these positions and give you the time to recover from such episodes.

[flitzanu]

i jsut wanted to add, @BMI03 i appreciate you openly taking all the criticism and not being defensive about it.  

it seems clear you know there's an issue, and as the others have pointed out this isn't going to be something that YOU can "fix" and i'm assuming that if this topic is brought up it will be a case of her not "having a problem" and refusing to admit that she was wrong.