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Am I going to screw this up?


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Posted

Last night I went on a first date that I thought went really well. A glass of wine turned into 2.5 hours. If I want to call her again tonight and ask her over for dinner at my place later in the week, am I screwing it up (both for calling her the next day, and by asking her to dinner at my place on the second date)?

Posted

I wouldn't rush it. A day or two delay won't do any harm. Besides, it will give her a chance to call you!

 

A second date dinner at your place may be moving a wee bit too fast. Slow down a bit. Build strong foundations first.

 

THEN jump her bones!

 

Note for the literal minded - just kidding! :)

Posted
Last night I went on a first date that I thought went really well. A glass of wine turned into 2.5 hours. If I want to call her again tonight and ask her over for dinner at my place later in the week, am I screwing it up (both for calling her the next day, and by asking her to dinner at my place on the second date)?

 

Yes, you would screw it up. Huge mistake. I'd call Thursday and ask her out for bowling or pool Sunday. You've got to keep it very light and move slowly in the beginning. Calling her the next day and inviting her over for dinner is disasterous.

Posted

Calling the next day will tell her what you want to tell her - that you enjoyed her company and want more. If she is equally enthusiastic, ask if she'd like to do something on the weekend. If she continues to be enthusiastic, ask if there's something she'd like to do. Nothing whatsoever wrong with calling the next day. But for sure don't invite her to dinner at your place yet. Leave that for several dates hence.

Posted

I agree with Outcast..

 

Nothing wrong with calling the next day..

 

It is a relationship that you are supposed to be building.. not a game platform

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Posted

Okay I'll take her ice skating instead.

 

Still confused about calling today :) Two for and two against.

Posted

I say call her. I personally like to receive a phone call the next day after a date. It lets me know he's actually into me. If she really likes you calling the day after a first date isn't going to scare her away.

Posted

is your name ...?? j/k

 

I had a 2.5 hour glass of wine a few weeks ago with a new guy. He didn't call but I saw him on msn and said "thanks again, i had a great time". He was marked "away" at the time.

 

Then I got an email a week later ... he got my msn message and he said he looked in his phone and didn't have my number, and asked if he may have it, so I emailed back with my #.

 

I suspected he didn't have it because I called him first...we were on msn and agreed to go out, and it would have been long dist for him, so i said I'd call when I was on the way...and he didn't have call display.

 

But, he still hasn't called me...prob one of those guys thinking "if she's interested, she'll call"....why else would he ask for my # and not call?

 

Call her sometime before the weekend...but tell her you're booked this weekend and make a date for the following week or wknd...don't wanna look to anxious, yet polite enough to call.

Posted

Ice skating is an excellent idea. As far as when to call, here's the reason I say wait three or four days. You know you're very interested in her. What you don't know is how interested she is in you. A very important distinction. The way you find out is to just play it very cool and take it slowly. This is an example of being a challenge. Calling the next day makes you look very eager, and if her interest level in you is lukewarm, then a call the next day is only going to lower her interest. If, on the other hand, she really digs you and can't wait to hear from you again, you have nothing to lose by waiting a few days. In fact, she'll be more intrigued by you. You can call it a game if you want to, but that's what dating is, whether you like it or not. If you don't play to win, you'll be posting under "breaking up" instead of "dating."

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