Is there a good solution for me in all of this or should I not even bother trying?

[Gebidozo]

1 hour ago, TheEternalPessimist said:

Yes I understand what being vulnerable means, I would have no problem being vulnerable once in a while when I actually get into a relationship someday but that's not the case right now.  

Err… no, you clearly don’t understand what it means in the context, otherwise you wouldn’t say you’d be vulnerable “once in a while”. The whole point of being vulnerable is that it is a permanent state of putting yourself out there and being who you are, without fear or pretense.

If instead you prefer to play “alpha male” games with women to hide your insecurities, feel free to keep doing that, but don’t be surprised that this high school tactic doesn’t work with mature people and is essentially obliterating your hopes of having a normal relationship.