What to do if you don’t know where the two of you stand with each other? Has anyone had a positive outcome?

[Amtguy]

I know I want her, I know I want her to love me back; however I sure she’s not interested in me. Instructors and friends at school think we’re a cupped and are surprised to find out we’re not. I grew up in a judgmental family and therefore I’m afraid to ask her what  we are. I’ve told her before I’m interested in the possibility of a relationship and that I trust her completely. What should I do? Has sticking it out ever worked for you?

On the positive side  she called an afternoon we had together a date, and she had a good time (we have known each other for five months this date took place a month ago,). We go to the gym together from time to time. She often will let me share/buy lunches. She’s introduced me to her closest female friend. I know her sister knows of me by name (in a good way). As mentioned before friends, strangers and structures think we’re a couple although we’re not. She is willing to be around me in privet although she doesn’t have to be. From day one she has sat alongside and continues to study with me.

On the other hand, I’ve heard her say that she’s not looking for relationships. I shouldn’t get too used to having dates, and I need to tone it down around her, and my actions haven hurt the fendship. 

please before you say talk to her, I’ve been conditioned for thirty five years to just stay quiet in case of judgement. We have another year together to get through our program, and develop a career; or focus more at your schooling (I have a 4.0 and have sent the school record). 

she has had a profound change in quality of life including, but not limited to, getting me fit by working out at the gym, taking better pride in my appearance, and doing things on my own.

How should I deal with the ambiguity and fear of rejection? Should I just wait it out and see what happens? It’d be nice if I had a success story.  
 

 

[Gebidozo]

2 hours ago, Amtguy said:

Has sticking it out ever worked for you?

Not for me and not for anyone else. The longer you stay in the “friendzone”, the less she will see you as a potential romantic candidate.

“Waiting” for a woman who doesn’t have romantic feelings for you is creepy and humiliating. Please don’t do that.

 

2 hours ago, Amtguy said:

How should I deal with the ambiguity and fear of rejection?

There is no ambiguity. She isn’t interested in you romantically. Stop meeting her and find someone who reciprocates your interest.