Looking for others experiences of affair to relationship

[Bobby]

We met when we were at the end of long 30+ year marriages. 

We met nine months ago.  I left my husband two months later.   He left his wife five months after we met, which is now four months ago.  

We are still a secret.  Only a couple of close family members are aware of our situation.  We would like to move to a traditional, normal relationship without anyone ever finding out.  This is mostly to preserve the relationship with our adult children, and relationships with other friends if possible.    

There's been a lot of waiting, and it's hard, but at some point we want to stop waiting and let people know we have "met someone".

So, to those who have been here before, any tips on how to do this?  What timeframe will people think is acceptable?  I would dearly love to move in with him now, but it's probably way too soon.

[Gebidozo]

My experience with my current partner has been similar in some ways. We started an affair when I was in a long-term relationship, then broke up, then reconnected a year and a half later, which caused her to get out of her relationship.

We aren’t secret, but her relatives still refuse to accept me after almost 3 years. They think her ex was a much better match.

I can only imagine how much harder it is for the relatives of someone who’s been married for 30 years.

i definitely don’t suggest to move together so soon, and take your time making this relationship publicly official. As long as it’s official between you two, and as long as it doesn’t affect the actual time spent with your current partner, it doesn’t make much difference who knows about it and who doesn’t.