spidercuz Posted July 28 Posted July 28 few things l noticed about guys who have trouble meeting females 1) they were never popular to begin with. that is to say, they never attracted females in school 2) not only are the unpopular with females, theyre also unpopular with men too lota these guys will make goofy excuses, saying "l am new in town" thats why l cant meet females. but how much you wanna bet that they werent attracting any females in their home town either. "l work with mostly guys". well you were in school with hundreds of fertile females, so what was your excuse there?
Gebidozo Posted July 28 Posted July 28 One thing is certain, someone who refers to women as “females” will definitely have troubles meeting them. 4
ExpatInItaly Posted July 28 Posted July 28 "Female" here. Pro tip: you will have an even harder time atracting women if you keep referring to us that way. 1
Carlston Posted July 28 Posted July 28 In my case the converse is not true I've never been a popular guy, never had more than a couple of friends but nd er had issues attracting women, many who were at the top of the attractiveness scale. Then again my lack of popularity and friends was at least partially related to my intolerance of most people in general.
Sony12 Posted July 28 Posted July 28 Person created their profile and immediately posted this thread. Nope they aren't trolling at all. There is a degree of truth to this for school age kids but once people are out in the real world it can become much harder to meet people no matter who you are. 1
Els Posted July 28 Posted July 28 12 hours ago, Gebidozo said: One thing is certain, someone who refers to women as “females” will definitely have troubles meeting them. Right?!?! Especially if that person refers to males as "men" in the exact same sentence... Gross.
Sony12 Posted July 28 Posted July 28 (edited) The OP might be Jason Brown from Last Chance U. Edited July 28 by Sony12
Gina2005 Posted July 28 Posted July 28 17 hours ago, spidercuz said: few things l noticed about guys who have trouble meeting females 1) they were never popular to begin with. that is to say, they never attracted females in school 2) not only are the unpopular with females, theyre also unpopular with men too lota these guys will make goofy excuses, saying "l am new in town" thats why l cant meet females. but how much you wanna bet that they werent attracting any females in their home town either. "l work with mostly guys". well you were in school with hundreds of fertile females, so what was your excuse there? are those guys the same that like to use the word females so much? 1
ShySoul Posted July 29 Posted July 29 On 7/27/2025 at 9:46 PM, spidercuz said: few things l noticed about guys who have trouble meeting females 1) they were never popular to begin with. that is to say, they never attracted females in school 2) not only are the unpopular with females, theyre also unpopular with men too I presume by meeting females you mean forming dating/romantic relationships with them? I have had very few cases of romance with women. However, I have always got along great with women. I have been closer to more women then men in my life, going as far back as I can remember. As a shy and reserved person, I was never Mr Popular. But I got along with nearly everyone I have ever known. And the couple that I haven't were people who had trouble getting along with anyone. My best friend of 20 years is female. I have had females tell me I understand them completely and that they wish more guys were like me. I have been told by women that I would make the perfect boyfriend. And many have admitted to being attracted to me. I even once had someone leave a note on my apartment door wanting to get to know me because she had seen me and was curious. Don't think attracting women is the issue. The reality is that there are many different reasons things might not work out. It takes the right two people, at the right time and place, both being interested and able to start something for a relationship to work out. You can get along well with the opposite sex, be popular with them, but just not meet the right person. Or you could meet someone but one of you not be in the right place for more. It might not be popularity, it could be timing. For that matter, it could be circumstances. Have a friend who is an aerospace engineer. The major, at least when he did it, was pretty much all men. Wasn't that he was unpopular with women, it was that he literally wasn't around many. And yet, he did meet one and ended up married to her. It had noting to do with being popular. What it did have to do with was him beng a caring and thoughful person who showed this woman love and respect. Probably a bigger problem if you look at women and feel the need to comment on them being "fertile." Seeing things in terms of attraction, popularity and fertility will fail you in the long run. Seeing things in terms of respect, heart, and compassion will pay off in the end. 1
enterthevoid Posted July 29 Posted July 29 (edited) They're women. Not females. You call men men, so call women women. You also call them "fertile females" like they're a different species. You would have a better dating life if you just treated them like regular people. Your point about "attracting them" seems like a pickup artistry thing. i.e. you plan on doing specific things to make women attracted to you, because women are the same and they're a vending machine where you push specific buttons and the outcome you want comes out. Instead of trying to "attract them", get to know them as people. And yes, having good social skills will generally help you across the board (dating, friendships, career, etc). That's a given. Edited July 29 by enterthevoid 1
smackie9 Posted August 16 Posted August 16 Guys that were not popular in school due to social awkwardness...most grow out of it as they work jobs, interact with different people...that's how you navigate life. If you keep rejecting what is put in front of you, of course you will be left alone because you bring nothing to the table then. Women want strength and stability. ...a man to take the lead, a man that's not afraid to talk to people.
Foxhall Posted August 16 Posted August 16 On 7/28/2025 at 5:46 AM, spidercuz said: they were never popular to begin with. that is to say, they never attracted females in school school days can leave quite a scarring for sure, It is true it can take a number of years to get over the psychological trauma of school days shortcomings, I thought maybe less so in the modern era teenagers appears a whole lot more self assured and comfortable with the opposite sex (but then for the ones who are not as self assured it is probably an even more traumatic time) Not to let school days define us however is the key thing- you might never have a spoke to a girl at school but you could still be dating models by the time you are 30- everyone blossoms at different stages
longdue Posted August 17 Posted August 17 (edited) I get it—you’re hurt and frustrated. Your needs aren’t being met. And sure, the world might say “nobody owes you anything,” but that doesn’t make it sting any less. It’s normal to feel angry or want to lash out. You are that hungry kid on the outside of the restaurant on Christmas looking in on the party through the window. I went through something similar growing up. We didn’t have much money—I often wore pants that were too short as an example—and some of the popular kids could be pretty mean to me. They chased after the rich, confident boys. I was good academically, so I often got used too. The funny thing is, a lot of those same girls are still bouncing through relationships, complaining about how there are no good men out there. (I know I am being mean here but I am human). It was partly my fault because those were the ones I initially tried to interact with. Then I learnt from it. A lot of the quieter people I knew back then, the ones who weren’t chasing status, ended up building more grounded, lasting relationships. I still talk to some of them, they are friends and we help each other out. Not everyone is shallow or only looking for what they can get out of a relationship. The catch is, those people aren’t loud, and you won’t find them yelling on Reddit threads. They’re out living quietly, with hobbies, reading books on a couch, finding zen in low-key places. That’s where you’ll have to look. And because they’re less experienced, just like you, they’ll make mistakes. They might get clingy, communicate badly, or frustrate you sometimes. The easy thing is to dismiss them with our own labels and move on. But if you’re willing to put in the effort, it’s worth it. Treat them the way you’d treat a friend who sometimes gets on your nerves. If friendships don’t come easy, focus on building those first. It’s not your fault if your parents didn’t help much with social skills. Girls usually get a little bit more coaching both at home and in their social circles in these things, while boys are just tossed out into the world and expected to figure it out. And don't get hugs after the arrows in school (though that is changing). But that doesn’t mean you can’t learn. Social skills are like any other skill—you can pick them up with deliberate practice. Most people genuinely want to see others happy. You probably do too. Don’t let cruel people convince you otherwise. Yes, you’re hurt, maybe even bitter at times, but that bitterness can push away the kind of person who might have been right for you. If someone is mean to you, that says more about them than it does about your worth. I know it’s easier said than done, but try to remind yourself of this at least a few days after a painful moment. It’s better to be alone than stuck in a relationship with someone who tears you down, because such people will, constantly. There are kind people out there, and when you meet one, be ready to meet them with kindness and forgiveness in return. And for perspective—plenty of women were also unpopular in school. They were teased for being poor, quiet, or not dating the “right” guys. They carry their own scars. Some of them are bitter, just like you feel now. Sometimes when someone snaps at you, it’s not really about you—it’s their past. That could even make you kindred spirits. Over time, you’ll get better at telling the difference between someone who’s just another “Mean Girls” sequel character and someone who’s just hurt. That skill is worth developing. I was a pretty awkward guy myself. I got called every name for it. I had some rough experiences, but also some good ones, and I grew from both. You wouldn't know my background looking at me now. I get called charming, friendly, compassionate, zen and other kinder names now. And when my partners say that I always remember myself as that awkward, hurt boy in school, I would have never thought I'd hear it. You’ll get there too. You’ve got your whole life ahead of you. So keep looking for the kinder ones. Sorry for the wall of text, but I just wrote what I wish someone had told me then. Edited August 17 by longdue 1
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